roses are red, violets are blue, I suck at rimes, refridgerator.

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when the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, that's a black eye.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Two Jews walk into a bar. They order martinis and have a wonderful time.

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Why is Santa's sack so big? His doctor recently diagnosed him with testicular cancer.

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whats worse than a worm in a rotten apple? 2 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 2 worms in a rotten apple? 3 worms in a rotten apple. whats worse than 3 worms in a rotten apple? the haulocaust. whats worse than the haulocaust? 4 worms in a rotten apple. wait wait...that was rascist,nevermind this joke.

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why did the chicken cross the road.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I suck at poems nice tits.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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How do you starve a black person? Hide his food stamps in his work boots

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How do you make the perfect anti-joke? Don't tell it.

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If you have 10 fish and you drown 5 how many do you have left? 10... you can't drown a fish, and even if you could you would still have 10 because there would still be there, they would just be dead. 5 alive, 5 dead

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Q. What's black and white and red all over? A. Certainly not a newspaper. Nobody reads those anymore.

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What's longer then Kim Kardashian's Wedding? 73 days.

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There are two types of people in this world. People who can count, and people who can't.

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knock knock. who's there? whoer whoer who? whoer you?

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What do you do to a duck with no bill? Please, leave the duck alone, it's bad enough for him having no bill.

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How did the Pollack die? Cardiac arrest.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive Cause she's a woman

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why did we start questioning the philosophical reasoning of chickens?

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What does a girl with no arms on a swing? Falls.

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why did the arrow hit the knee? the same reason pigs cant fly.

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The awkward moment when you notice its 2012 and we're all gonna die, so you buy and elephant and name him John.

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Then there was that caveman that ordered a whiskey on the rocks...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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