I remember my first "I remember my first-" joke

What happened to Liam? He died because of an infected scrotum.

What's worse then a dead baby? a dead baby in a blender

Disregard Females, Acquire Currency.

how do you drown a blonde in a kitty pool? put a scratch and sniff sticker at the bottom

What did the fat man buy at Mcdonalds? A salad, hes on a diet

a man walks into a bar... and he says 'ouch!'

what's magenta and has 7 legs? nothing.

What is black blue and screaming? Your daughter when i kicked the shit out of her

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? I was eating an orange in the park last week when I saw four men brutally murdered before my very eyes.

69

This guy walks up to the bartender, and says to him, " ill bet you $100 that i can piss in this cup from 20 ft away." The bartender laughs, thinking hes gonna get an easy 100 bucks. he says "ok, u do that and ill watch." the guy says "ok but one second." he then walks over to this table full of guys and the bartender see him and them whispering and shaking heads. then the guys walks back over, and says to the bartender, "ok here i go" then he whips out his wang and starts pissing all over the place,all over the bartender, the counter, everywhere but the cup. Meanwhile the bartenders laughing, because he thinks he made some easy money. then the bartender asks the guy for his money and the guy says, "alright one minute." then the guys walks over to the table full of guys and they al start pulling out money and give it to him. so the guy walks over to the bartender and says, "here you are, your 100 bucks" the bartender notices him smileing and says "u just lost 100 bucks why are you happy?" and the guy says, " you see that table full of guys over there? well, i bet them all $500 dollars that i could piss all over you, your counter and all of your things, and that youd not only be happy about it, but youd laugh!!!"

What’s the best part about winning a gold medal? Nothing. You’re on acid and staring straight at the sun.

Why did the 1,000 pound woman start crying? Because her son got hit by a car.

What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? Horse semen

What is green and has wheels? Grass, i was lying about the wheels

why did the mexican slave have cuts and bruises all over her. She fell off her skateboard... Another joke by rangler. thumbs up for more.

What did the man say to the other man? I am unsure of what he said, but it seemed like a pretty nice conversation until one of the men got hit by a elephant.

what did the man say when he got in the car?nothing he lost his voice in an accient that morning

I slept with a girl with aids and now I do and so does everybody else I have sex with

If Roger buys 109 candy bars and eats 65, what does he have? Diabetes.

the awkward moment when Rick Astley gives you up

ur mother

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? With the technology of compact fluorescent light bulbs they don't go out for much longer, so the question is nearly irrelevant.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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