How did Hellen Keller's parents torture her? They made her go to bed when she wasn't very sleepy

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what is worse than finding a fly in your coffee been raped

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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Why was Susie screaming profusely? Susie has autism.

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An Irish man, a Scottish man and an English man walk into a bar ... The Irish man's a bit dim, the Scotsman's tight with money and the Englishman's a bit of a racist.

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When life gives you lemons you leave the earth in search of what strange lifeform sent you them.

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how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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What do you call a man with three arms and three legs and no nose. A highly unlikely instance that no one would believe is real.

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What do you call a black man in a police car? Officer.

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It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

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How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb in WW2. None, the Nazis toke away the power and left them to die a Horrible and painful death.

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A women walks out of a kitchen.

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Why was the monkey sad? Because somebody stole his banana. Why was the monkey happy? Because your parents are dead.

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What do you call a black guy flying an airplane? A pilot.

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whats better than shoes feet

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A cat and a dog walk into a bar. The bartender says "it's refreshing to see perennial enemies enjoying each others company".

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Why don't women wear watches? In the technologically advanced age that we live in, the watch is rapidly being replaced with other electronic devices that tell time, such as cell phones or iPods.

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A man walks into a bar, he drinks, then leaves the bar.

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look at there!! an entire dog!!

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? Actually a lot because a pizza is a pizza andna Jew is a human.

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What's the difference between an alcoholic and a drug dealer? An alcoholic is an extremely corrupted, and unhealthy living person. Though so is a drug dealer... They are both very harmful situations in many ways.

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whats the difference between santa claus and jewish people santa claus goes down the chimney and jewish people go up

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What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

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A man walks into a bar... ...because he is blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops