Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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What's the best joke of all? YOUR SOCIAL LIFE!!!!!!!

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Nothing. Animals are not capable of speaking.

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What's more boring than watch grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? where's my tractor?

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What do you call Magic Johnson in a wheel chair? A tragedy, especially considering his past struggles with HIV.

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A man had a terminal illness. He died a few months after he was diagnosed.

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Whats big, tall and fat? Most of America.

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Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

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why did Louisa go black and never go back? She got hit by a truck

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It's a scientific fact that if you took all the veins out of your body, and lined them up end to end, you would die.

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why did the boy buy a dirty magizine? he should not have, its been on the floor. who wants to read the rolling stone magizine if it has dirt on it. how dumb of him.

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Steering Wheel Face.

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how do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Jeep? Four.

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Why was the truck covered in blood? The chicken tried crossing the road

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the iPod hand is such a great deal It's only seven ninety-nine..........................................ninety nine for one hundredth of a dinosaur wait a minute...

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25

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How can you tell Egyptian Bees are tired? When they put down their suitcases and yell "IM Tired!"

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Why did the monkey sit on the toilet? To have a bowelmovement

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He farted

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What do Ethiopians do at Christmas ? Starve...

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What did Santa Claus say to the young boy on Christmas Day? Santa Claus is a myth, that was actually a pedophile.

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Some people are like Slinkies: they get really boring after a while.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops