Remember that part where Jesus gets angry at a fig three and kills it because it "was lazy" for refusing to grow figs at winter? Brother Jeez, that was kinda mean man! You know it was winter rite? Anti Joke or not, that part is funny, so if Jesus returns and wants you to make him a sammich you better go get that goddamn sammich!

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What do you call an overly-sexual, chewbacca-like creature that smokes cocaine and shoots heroin, while beating its offspring? Mom.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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once upon a time there was a chicken, it crossed a road however unlikely this chicken has become famed for its crossing and will be hailed for eternity. through the chickens actions thus the first anti joke was born

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stinky boner

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You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

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Why are apathy,ignorance, and resentment alike? I dont know and I don't care to know.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

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DEAD ON KANE ITS BEEN ALL YOU ABD CAOIMHIN

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Who smokes a lot of weed and speaks 5 different languages? Rosetta Stoner.

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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This person shaved their head to gain attention. A klansman.

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What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

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whats red and bad for your teeth? a brick.

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why wouldn't the man's car work? because it was broken.

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Does Fall come before winter? There is no defiant answer due to the fact that all seasons are in a cycle and our race has no answer to which season happened first on Earth.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

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What happend to the girl in the corner? Idk that's why I asked!! :P

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A grandfather clock fucked my bicycle!

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what do you call a million black people on the moon? a good start

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How do you make a clown shut up? Throw a axe at it!!

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What is worse than torturing, "forcibly penetrate" and then slowly and painfully kill nine billion people? The Holocaust?

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David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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