Why did the hippo drink the water? Because it was thirsty

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Why are some people so barbaric? Because some people are German.

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What do you call a girl who has slept with five guys? Her name.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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Why did the man get go to sleep? He got hit in the face with a hammer.

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pants on the ground pants on the ground lookin like a fool with your pants on the ground

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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AntiJoke will not let me type this so I will add some spaces. N I G G E R.

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What's just not right? Left

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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Why did the black man scream in church? He felt like it.

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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Sigh, at times like this I begin to ponder what I am doing with my life. I do not look that much like some anime character thingie, she is awfully cute for a anime character though.

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What's funny about Magic Johnson's T-Cell count? Nothing. He has AIDS, and it's a degenerative disease, that will eventually result in death. There's nothing funny about that.

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How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

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If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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