What one thing do the five members of Mystery Inc have in common? They were all raped and killed by REAL MONSTERS! One of the monsters happened to be Chuck Norris. He's a BEAST!

Their were three business men going on a trip, they had only one bed in the hotel so they had to sleep in the same bed. The next day guy on the right said i a great handjob last night and the guy on the left said the same thing. The guy in the middle said last night i was dreaming i was skiing

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other... Uh oh. A car just ran it over.

One day, Jimmy didn't wake up.

why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

Where did Little Johnny go when the bomb hit? Everywhere.

What did the prisoner get for Christmas? A lethal injection.

Roses are black. Violets are black. Black people are black, And you're a douche.

A blond, burnette, and red head walk into a bar. They sit together and enjoy a few drinks while catching up on eachother's lives.

What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

why did kim kardashian get divorced? because she was unhappy with her marrige. and because shes a slut

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

2 men walk into a bar, the 3rd man ducks and ask them if they're ok

What did the cow say to the Businessman? Nothing. Cows cant talk.

Why did the chicken cross the road? That is none of your concern as it invades his freedom of privacy.

Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

When life hands me beef, I make lemon stew.

Why did the white man beat the black man in a fight? The white man was bigger. Also, he was a black belt in Brazillian Jiu Jitsu.

Why couldn't the black man get out of jail? He couldn't post his bond.

Why can't february march Because april may

Ask me if i'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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