A man walks into a doctors office He has AIDS

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: This is actually a really good question which leads me to wonder why the farmer let the chicken out in the first place.

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What Did Gretel say to Hansel? Stop having sex with Ariana Grande!

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What's black and runs fast? Newsflash: Most of you are racist.

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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A frog walks up to Steve, and says "Hey, Steve." Steve is terrified because a frog knows his name, and is walking.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a Fire extinguisher? One puts out a fire the other one fuels it.

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No smoking No eating No drinking On this bus Didn't say anything about sniffing

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A Muslim walks into a bar No-one survives the blast

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A man works at a Doritos factory hes worked there for a few weeks and hes made the most Doritos in his line now and the head of the company gives him a promotion he now runs his own line a few months later the head of the company bob comes back to him and promoted him again to now our friend Carl is head of the Factory about two years later bob comes to Carl and hes promoted to head of the east coast he is head of 27 Factories about a decade later bob asks Carl if when he retires Carl will take over the company and he accepts bobs offer 23 years pass and bob retires Carl is the new head of the company so he is about like 65 at this point and he wants some wine so him and his buddies go for some wine Dan says Carl this lines two long so they decide to have some soda and then Jason says this lines longer then the last one so Aiden says to Carl why don't we go get some punch so they all got into line but there was no punch line a.w. j.p.

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Whats the definition of not winning? Charlie sheen losing custody of his son because he is a coked out, old man douche bag, who only gets told what he wants to hear because he forks out lots of money to gold digging hookers.

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from the slaughter house.

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What do you call a black man that is on fire? A Man on Fire. The fact that he is black has no relevance in this situation.

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Why couldn't the cat drink it's milk? Because it didn't have a face.

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A Finnish guy and a Russian guy go into a sauna. The Russian died.

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Why didn't the jew spend his paycheck? He wanted to save money for the future

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When The bus came by Jimmy went bye-bye

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Roses are brown. Violets are brown. Who pooped in my garden?

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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