There's a football player who walks into a bar and sees a gay guy. The gay guy says, "So you're a football player, right?" The football player says, "Yes." The gay guy says, "I have a game of football myself. It's called fart football. It's where you drink a mug of beer in less than five seconds and then you drop your pants and fart for the extra point." The gay guy goes first. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds and farts. The football player goes. He drinks the mug of beer in less than five seconds then he drops his pants and before he farts, the gay guy says, "BLOCK THAT KICK! BLOCK THAT KICK!"

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What do you call 100 dead babies in my garage? Murder.

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your mommas so fat she jumped for joy and got stuck

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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Nathaniel Nugnes walks into a bra

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

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What did the worm a fisherman used to catch fish called when the worm killed a trout? Master Bate.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

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What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

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How did the seal die? It went clubbing ... Then overdosed on ecstasy, it was very sad.

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what comes in a can ? Beans Where do beans come from ? Cans

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Did You Hear about the Black Guy That went to College?....Neither Did I...

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Correct grammar and proper use of capitals on the internet. Oh yeah, and a horse walked into a bar. It didn't think much of it.

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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how does chuck norris eat an apple Just like every other person

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Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

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Two men walk into a bar. An hour later another man sees them knocked out on the ground. Q: What Happened A: They walked into a BAR.

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Why did the piece of gum cross the road? It was stuck to the chicken's foot.

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A little boy had a candle by his bedside. It fell over. The candle was fake, and it didn't burn down his house. When he woke up, he picked up the candle, put it back on his nightstand and had a wonderful day.

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A black guy stands outside the Tigers stadium with a cigar and tries to sell tickets... noone buys them... I have a comlplete raging boner and I'm gonna go beat off!

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Why was the little boy late to school Cause he walked on a landmine

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A white, black, and Hispanic man walk into a bar at 2:00 in the morning. Unfortunately the bar closed at midnight, so they were charged with breaking and entering, and were sentenced to 2 years in prison.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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