You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A gay man watches football.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

You arrive in the middle east. What is the first thing that you want to do? Leave

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: So I don't get it. Do women actually like not having penises and testicles? Do they genuinely enjoy it? A: Silly boy. Women ADORE not having penises and testicles. You just can't get your mind around someone having different preferences in anatomy than you.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

how many flys in a box six --sticksack

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

So two men were drinking beer and one asks "Why are you so sad today, Lenny?" The other man replies "Because I was just diagnosed leukemia." Four days later Lenny dies and his body was buried at Cherryhill Cemetery where his family mourned over his death.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

what do you call a middle-aged man with one blue suede shoe on, purple hair, pink skin, white eyes, no toenails, 67 fingers, 1 eye, a pocket watch, no clothes, and 8978967564567898765432345678765321234568909876543w245678909876543456098765323456-0987654367890-098765435678-09876543456789098765432345678909876543456789098765435678909876543234567898765323456890-987654345678900987654323456890987653234567890765434568909876543456899876543456789098765434568909876545678987654345678987654567898765434567898765478579458765456789876543223456789876543098765432123456898765432678987654230987653-098765434567898765434898765434567898765456787654567876 butt cheeks? bob.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What happened when barba opened the coca cola? The cap flew off and hit the fence then the train then the moon then the pillow then the sun then the pole and the pole fell and hit the baseball and the cap landed on the floor... Then my turtle died

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops