What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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a fat kid walked up to me today at school and claimed he could do more pull ups than i. i found this very funny because i have known this boy since i was two months old, and he witnessed the day where i lost both of my arms to cancer.

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Q: What's black and hangs from a tree? A: A tire swing.

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A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

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So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

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Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

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why are black people always so funny because they think of funny jokes

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Have you heard of the dog that sounds like Megan fox? No Oh, well ummm apperantally there's this ummm dog that sounds like Megan fox. So ummm yeah. Pretty interesting stuff

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Romney: I think you would raise our debt and make more Americans jobless. Obama: It's just cuz I'm black!

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Patient- Doctor! I feel like a piece of ****! Doctor- What is ****? Patient- It's four dots on the computer screen representing a curse word. Doctor- What computer screen?

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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Q.Why was the fat man sweeting A. Because he just ran and his body is trying to maintain thermal equilibrium

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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Why did the cat scratch the person? Because it's mean.

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What did the farmer say to little susie? I have a gun. Get in the car and dont scream or i will kill you

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Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

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What do the Chinese call "Ping Pong"? Ping Pong

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"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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