How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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A man walks into a bar. He asks for a beer. One of the bar tenders twlls him they are all out. He takes out his gun. He has 1 bullet and there are 3 bar tenders. He wants to kill them all. What does he do? A: Shoots 1 and pegs bricks at the other two.

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What does the Priest say to the little boy? Size doesnt matter

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? ........finding a worm in your apple.

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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Why did Li Chong get an A on his math test? He studied.

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Oh, no! There is a ginger jew within 2 meters of me!

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Q: How did the man walk across the road? A: With his own 2 feet!

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Why did everyone die in the world? Its 2012.

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Thanks, I admire your sincerity, and I am happy to see that I got a lot more in common with you, than with well, my nerdy and geeky friends, which are not reading this here and now unless they are going against their orders and messing up their own work schedule. I just want you to know that I have fallen in love with you Nero, and if that is a problem for you, please let me know ASAP.

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Dog Dog wh- wait how did you knock? *mindblown*

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Superman and Batman get in a fight, who wins? No one the world has just lost a superhero.

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what did the astronomer say when he lost his telescope? where is my telescope?

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Q: What are the best kind of jokes? A: The funny ones.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I like funny jokes but I tend to ruin the punchline by just talking too much and that's probably why no one likes me and...

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Mother Theresa, Billy Graham, and Joseph Smith walk into a bar. Just kidding, no they didn't.

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What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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give me a gun or i will shoot you i dont know what with but i will kill you so run run or i will come and get you

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says nothing to the man running the stand. Realizing that the duck might potentially keep patrons from approaching the stand, he packs up and moves elsewhere.

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why are some people black? Because god decided there needs to be different people in the world therefore none are congruent

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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