Why did the chicken cross the road? Because his monthly car bill is too freaking high and can't afford to take car to work, where all of his co- workers are waiting to tease him!

A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

What did the homosexual farmer say when he answered the phone? Hello

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

What do you get if you put a baby in a blender? An Erection

Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

What is easier than making pie? Making cake!

- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

What did the cat say to the dog? Miaow. What did the dog say to the cat? Miaow.

You know what's funny? Rape

Why was the teacher sad? Because her boyfriend broke up with her.

"I'm gonna fight fire with fire!" "won't you just get more fire?" "True..."

How do you starve a Mexican? You stick him in a secure room and deprive him of food resources

A 14 year girl enjoys exploring the sexual regions of her body, whilst having one of her intimate sessions her brother walks into her room. Her brother was a rather sexual 17 year old, who has had sex with several different girls, and is not afraid to try new things. the brother says " get a room to his sister... oh wait" and walks out

How many Polacks does it take to screw in a light-bulb? One. A person's ethnicity or country of origin, or religion for that matter, would have no bearing on one's ability to perform the relatively simple task of installing a light-bulb. Furthermore, there is no reason to use the negative slur 'polack' when referring to a person of Polish descent.

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

What did a Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know, I don't speak Chinese.

Why was Joe lying on the ground? Because he got shot.

A blonde, brunette, and a redhead are taking a chemistry exam. They each get a solid B on the test.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

Once there was an egg by the name of Steve. His name was Steve the Egg.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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