Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

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Allah walked into AK Bar

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5 Italian guys from Long Island

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jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

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I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

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An alligator was found wearing a vest. The investigator had no comment... As alligators are incapable of speech. ^^^

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Chuck Norris was in a staring contest with the sun. He's blind now.

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How long does it take for light to travel a light-year ? A year.

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What's black, white, and red all over? A lot of things, you just gotta keep your eyes peeled.

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A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

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A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

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Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

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Why did the Mexican mow lawns? He needed money to pay for his college tuition.

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Why is the bowler right handed? He has no left hand.

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Yo mama so stupid, she scored poorly on her SAT exams in high school. She was unable to recieve a college education. She now works as a full time waitress at a small diner. She earns minimum wage and is still getting nowhere on her search for a better job.

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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A blonde walks into a bar. She got free drinks.

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why'd the chicken cross the road It didn't, it was safely placed inside a chook house

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How many days can a pelican whisper? Pelicans can't whisper.

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Q. Why dont people like shane murchan ? A. Because he wears chinos .....

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Want to hear a joke? ...you're straight.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops