Three girls are walking in the woods they see tracks one thinks it is a bear the other thinks it is a deer the last one thinks it is a lion They all argue till they get hit by a train and realized they were train tracks

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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Why was the little Asian boy crying at the county fair? He had just watched his entire family get brutally crushed beneath the weight of the old ferris wheel as they went to get on. Never would he forget the painful screams of his mother as her blood splashed onto his white t-shirt. Never would he forget the police car ride to the foster home when it all sank in that they were truly gone. And never would he forget the abuse his new parents would inflict on him daily. But what would forever torment him most were those screams. Those persistent screams that woke him in the night until the day he died many, many years later.

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What do a tree and I have in common? We would both be mad if we got turned into paper.

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Where does a one-legged waitress work? Wherever she can get good health insurance.

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A Chinese man fails a math test

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm using my hand but thinking of you.

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Why did Michael Jackson name his kid blanket? Because after years of drug abuse and sexual insecurity led to him thinking unrealistically during the birth of his children.

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Why did the young boy hit the other young boy? Because the other young boy was bullying his friend and he thought it was time he should stand up for himself and take control of the situation.

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what happened to the batsman with bad footwork? he got out what did the batsman do when he got out? he left the ground due to the nature of the ruling

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What was going through the man's head on the 51st floor when the first plane hit? The 52nd floor.

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Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

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You can pick your friends you can pick your nose but you cant pick your friends nose.

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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What did Bob say at Fred's house? "I know where Fred lives."

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How many kids with ADD does it take to screw in a lightbulb Wanna go ride bikes?

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Why did Hellen Keller drive off of the cliff? Because she is a woman.

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Whats funnier than a guy in a wheelchair? A guy on the floor squirming to get back in his wheelchair.

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Q: Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? A: Taking the laws of physics into consideration, most likely nobody

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Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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Yo' Mama is so fat, her driver's license says, "picture continued on other side."

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What's the difference between a ghost and a dolphin? A ghost isn't a dolphin.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops