If u give brandon a stick he will most likely poke u

Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

Why did the chicken cross the road? it was thrown

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

whats worse than getting lost in europe? becoming the middle in the human centipede.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? I'm a talking banana; what more do you want from me?

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

Roses are red,violets are blue, i love the colour red and green but its a pitty because im not so keen.

Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

What happens to a blonde girl who is buying drugs off of a drug dealer? Nothing, she was an undercover police officer trying to arrest said drug dealers on the street.

Think of a number 1-10 Now add 39 Divide that by 20 Subtract two Now close your eyes.. Dark isn't it?

Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue If it wasnt for christmas We would all be jewish.

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

What's wore then finding a worm in your apple? Being the only person to survive a plane crash over Alaska, then having to eat your family in order to stay alive waiting for help to come.

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

why was the 6 year old boy crying? his mother had just passed away from terminal cancer and his stepdad caught him crying so he kicke hm in the face and told him to man up.

Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

Roses are red Violets are purple, and anyone who tells you otherwise is wrong.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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