Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Knock knock Who's there? Jehovah's Witness

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Why couldn`t Sally open the jar? Because she did not have thumbs.

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How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

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Why did the man not get his licence He was blind

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What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

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I still remember the last thing my grandfather said before he kicked the bucket. He said: "Hey, I wonder how far I can kick this bucket."

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What do you call a school bus full of black people? A school bus

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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a man was beating his wife his wife asks him to stop he says no and continues beating her

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How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face.

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A mormon walks into a bar. The Bartender says "What can I get you" The Mormon says "Sparkling Water please. In my religion we don't drink alcohol."

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What did the average man say the the bird? HOODINI

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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If life gives you lemons, You throw them as hard as you can at the nearest stranger. If life gives you melons, You're probably dyslexic.

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies in a truck? A: A pile of dead babies in a truck with one alive in the middle eating his way out.

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people who spank you sure are a pain in the ass.

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A black guy and a Mexican are sitting in a car who's driving??? The Cops

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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