- Anti Joke

If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

What do you call a murderer who killed a black man. kkk

An Aussie, American and Englishman were all drinking beer on a plane to Hawaii. All 3 of them were very excited for their vaction, which they all saved hard for and their breaks from work were well deserved.

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the chicken had just escaped from the slaughterhouse where he witnessed the brutal decapitation of his entire family and in his heightened emotional state was unable to map out a safer and more sensible route.

Q: What did osama bin laden say to the worker behind the gas station counter? A: May I buy this bag of chips?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To run away from ebola

Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

hey i just met you and this is crazy but here is my gun so get in the van

Why was six afraid of seven? Six had severe paranoia.

Why is it so hard to find slim fitting clothes in America? Because not many clothing stores carry them.

A priest, a rabbi, and a minister walk into a bar. The rabbi survives.

Roses are red Violets are blue I love you a lot But you're dead and I have unhealthy necrophiliac tendencies

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

knock knock? come in

Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

Whats green has 4 legs and would kill someone if it fell out of a tree??? A pool table.....

what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

Q: What's brown and sticky? A: Feces

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?