"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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Jimmy's mom: Jimmy go do your chores now!! Jimmy: You shut your mouth, whore. Get your smelly ass back in the kitchen!!!

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What happened to the homeless guy when a woman gave him five dollars? He shot the woman because he is mentally retarded.

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Yo mama so stupid, she signed an apointment with Dr. Pepper

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A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

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If life hands you lemons... Question yourself what just happened because life isn't tangible and has no way of handing you lemons, and even if it did, why lemons?

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No? Neither have they.

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What is the diffrence between you and I. I am not sure because i have not meet you yet

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Don't you just hate it when a sentence doesn't end the way you octopus?

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Why can't Chuck Norris divide by zero? Because it is impossible, the answer is undefined.

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Why arent guys and girls the same? Cause there different

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why couldn't the girl watch t.v? Because her house burned down

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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What's black, white and red all over? A race war

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Hello

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A kid goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor! it hurts when I do this!" The Doctor says, "Well, because you have been diagnosed with ALD, and to make matters worse you are allergic to rapeseed oil" The child then cries because he will never live past 40 years old

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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What's the difference between a good anti joke, and a bad anti joke? There literally is no good anti joke.

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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I found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school. I said, "Wow, I can't believe I just found an iPhone on the ground at lunch during school." Later that day, my principal gassed the kindergarten classrooms with cyanide while shouting, "GO RAIDERS!"

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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