Mike: Hey Dave knock knock Dave: Come in!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have chlamydia, and now so do you!

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Why did the old man throw the clock out the window? Because he didn't want to go to a store that could repair it, so then he thought that it was better off on his yard where it could compost.

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Stop driving smart cars you fags

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How did Whitney huston die? By eating a turkey sasandwich and then put a car jump starter in the bath tub.

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Yes

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A man was struck by lightning. What did you think he got super powers or something? No. He died a horrible death

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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Q. Which famous celebrity has had the most children over the last 10 years? A. Michael Jackson

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Why is Michael J. Fox so go at dance? Because he took lesson as a child

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http://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&cd=1&ved=0CAsQFjAA&url=http%3A%2F%2Fhomepage.eircom.net%2F~cronews%2Felep%2Felep.html&ei=1aAjVMrJJcePoQS99ILADg&usg=AFQjCNEy4qvnhug3LTGYLGylpoRhxjk_zg

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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If an ugly person got raped. What would that be called? Nothing. It is never gonna happen. Kelvin Yang.

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i actually read the terms of service before i posted this

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was getting chased by nazis.

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What happened when the man fell off the boat? He went into the water and was viciously mauled by 5 alligators then ran over by another boat.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? Because she has no arms. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? Because she had no arms.... Knock, Knock, Who's there?: Not Sarah

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Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

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Why did the tomato fall off the swing? Because tomatoes don't have arms.

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What do you get if you mix a baby with a blender? A prison sentence.

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speacking of cheese... steve jobs died

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops