Yo momma so old that she should be concerned about mesothelioma and asbestoses, as she may have lived during a period of increased asbestos use. She may also be at risk of osteoporosis and should take vitamin supplements daily to improve her rapidly deteriorating health.

Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

why did everyone laugh at the kid in the wheel chair as he entered the room? he was poor

What should you do if you have a 10 inch penis? Subtly tell the world via an anti-joke

What's fat, round and bounces on the ground? A ball. I lied about the fat bit.

Tony Romo

Knock knock Whos there Who Who who Don't stutter it was just a joke

Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

Q: Why did Sally keep falling off the swing? A: She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

How many mice does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Just two, the mystery is how mice can get inside a lightbulb.

Identical jokes get different amounts of votes

whats worse than failing your maths test?

I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

What is the Pirates favorite letter? C

What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

What did one bulbasaur say to one squirtle? Well, first off, pokemon are virtual animals created solely for the enjoyment of entertaining japanese children and causing seizure episodes. This fictional creation then migrated to an american tv market, still maintaining their superficial existence while continuing to promote slavery and the use of round balls that capture your problems and propagate winning through random ball throwing. They are fake, and as they are fake, the bulbasaur said "we are fake"

What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

What did the first Ethiopian say to the other? He asked for some food only to realize that the other one had already starved to death.

A baby seal walks into a club. I happens to be that the club is having their bi-annual PETA meeting, and the baby seal is chosen as the organization's new mascot. After touring the nation and meeting important world leaders, the baby seal still wonders why there was a club at the North Pole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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