Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

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swag

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Daisies are red. WHY IS MY GARDEN ON FIRE?

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender.

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What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

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I don't drink. I'm not 21.

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

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Gregory: Hey, aren't you that pretty girl I saw from the party? Jenny: Huh? Gregory: No wait, it can't be you. Because you are WAY prettier. Jenny: Aw, that's so sweet, lemme give you my phone number. Gregory: Okay I'm ready to copy Jenny: It's 1-800-get-a-life-loser Gregory: Biitch

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how did sally die? she starved because she cant get in to get the nuggets.

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in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

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A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

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So I was flirting with a girl at a bar the other day when this huge black guy walks up and says "Hey honey". I realized that I still had some un-addressed prejudices in me as he shook my hand, pointed out that it was a mistake anyone could make, and introduced me to a girl he had met at the college he works at.

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Why did the potato cross the road? It didn't. A potato is a vegetable. It cannot walk, think or speak.

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How did the the the police know Princess Diana had dandruff? They found her head & shoulders in the glove compartment.

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Two guys walked into a pub... and they totally redecorated it! It was brilliant.

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why did the black man fall down the stairs? he was blind, do to loss of vision from cancer

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What did the drug addict say to the doctor? I am a drug addict and am in need of help and rehabilitation.

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A man falls off a building and dies on Impact

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whats worse than finding out there's mold in your bread? finding out the holocaust is in your bread

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what did the sock say to the shoe? Get your tongue off me.

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If Donald Trump was in Game Of Thrones, he'd probably be a part of The Wall.

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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What did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? X box Kinect

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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