Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

A Jew finally tipped He was in a canoe

what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He flapped his wings, hovered, and the road crossed beneath him.

Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

What did the star say to the asteroid? Nothing, astral bodies can't talk, you dipshit.

Why did a girl get an STD? She had sex.

Gay rights.

Why did the cook throw up at McDonalds? Because his pay check was made out to the Ronald McDonald Foundation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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