What did the baby do when it crossed the rode? It didn't get across it got hit by a car.

How do you confuse an English Professor? Light your pants on fire and flop around like a fish.

Why did ben 10's omnitrix or watch break? Because he kept slapping it.

What did the towel say to the other towel? Nothing, there was no topic of conversation.

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

Why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

a black guy walks into a bar and sits next to a white guy. White guy: "I don't like your kind here". Black guy: "what kind wound that be"? White guy: "the colored kind". The black guy turns away then looks back at the white guy and says", When I'm born I'm black, when I die I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, and when I'm sick I'm black. You ( to the white guy ) when your born your pink, when you die your blue, when your cold your purple, and when your sick your green and your calling me colored???

One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

What did the man say to his wife while having sex? I don't know.

Nero, I am happy to hear from you again, but it kinda sounds like you are going to get yourself killed or something. Is there something else I can do? If that asshole is suffering, kill him after he is done doing it, I am done with that piece of shit. Honestly, what is going on Nero? You are not going to suicide or something are you? Please respond, right away, or I wont call your wife.

Your mother is so fat, she developed diabetes and was rushed to hospital. She might not make it.

What do you call a fat computer? Adele :)

Why was the unemployed dolphin trainer so sad? His life has no purpoise. In an unrelated topic, how is he unemployed id he is a dolphin trainer?

One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

My ex wife looks like a pitbull.

An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

Why did the magician die when he tried to escape from the handcuffs underwater? Because he drowned and failed his magic trick.

What did one muffin say to the other muffin? I don't know what they said, but one muffin, had a knife.

ok when a fat person say he on a diet i said your on a sea food diet what evert you see you eat now get back to school John f kennedy students

Why isn't Michael Jackson good at chess? Because he's dead.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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