I am pleased and honored to hear you speak that beautifully straight from your heart Nero, you are without equal, unmatched. And he who is unmatched, also stands alone.

Can we pretend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars? No, we can't.

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? No one, because a hollowed out pineapple carcass would not be able to last longer than a month in that high concentration of sodium.

What's a fry cook's favorite day? Saturday. It's his day off.

What is said about the man who is addicted to online gaming? He plays more than 5 hours per day and doesn't have any social contacts or whatsoever.

What do you call a black man on the moon?? Never going to happen

What is the funniest shirt Emil heskey has ever worn? A shirt that had this joke on it

Why was the little boy hit by a bus? I pushed him

Does your iPod have zoom on it? Yeah, but it doesn't have a camera

Allah walked into AK Bar

Hey I just met you and this is crazy but here's my chew toy throw it maybe!

Hazel and Gus are two teenagers who share an acerbic wit, a disdain for the conventional, and a love that sweeps them on a journey. Their relationship is all the more miraculous given that Hazel's other constant companion is an oxygen tank, Gus jokes about his prosthetic leg, and they met and fell in love at a cancer support group.

A Man Gets Cancer He eventually Loses all his hair and drops dead

A 10 year old underpriveledged boy goes to the second mile camp and meets his new counselor: Penn State defensive coordinator Jerry Sandusky. The two bond very much and talk a lot. Sandusky invites the boy back to the locker room to shower because the boy got muddy. The boy takes a shower, gets clean, and goes back to his cabin. The boy has a great time at the camp and goes home.

Why did the chicken cross the road? We will never know because he got hit by a car.

jim davidson , nick griffin , and bernard manning walk into a bar , and order a bitter, a lager, and a stout respectfully

5 Italian guys from Long Island

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead walk into a bar. They order a few drinks, chat, and walk out.

What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

I'm black and I will beat your children. (This is not an anti-joke)

What's worse then getting followed by a creepy man in a van? Getting followed and raped by a creepy man in a van.

What's more boring than watching grass grow? Watching grass not grow.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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