Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Yo mama's so ugly, one day she looked in the mirror and her face was a wreck. Later that day she committed suicide.

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Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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roses are red, violets are blue, im a bad poet, text me. LMFAO

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Why does the Easter Bunny hide his eggs? So nobody finds he's been fucking hens.

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what do you get when you you put a knife in a head? a dead body

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Why did the lion get lost? Because the jungle is massive

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What did I say to the joke? What? Correct.

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A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

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Why the african children was sad? - Because an octopus bite his arm

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Why was the Saudi Arabian terrorist flying a plane in America? He was going to visit some family on a ranch in Kansas.

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The man goes to the doctor after just losing his job because his company went under because of the econmic crisis. His house is being foreclosed because without the money from his job he can't afford to pay for his house. His girlfriend also just left him because of recent conflicts about money and she was looking forward to having a family and with him jobless it was just out of the question. Man:"Doctor I could really use some good news" Doctor:"You have aids"

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Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

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How does a cancer patient bathe? He can't because he lives in an arid climate where water is scarce.

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If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

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A man walks into a house, and the next day was taken to the hospital for a minor concussion and a possible vision deficiency.

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What do you call a Welshman with a stick up his arse? A very odd man

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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