Yellow People !!

The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

What's the difference between my girlfriend and a dead baby? I don't make out with my girlfriend after sex.

Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

Roses are red Bob is dead My name is Dave Your a microwave

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

Justin Bieber

What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

Q: What do Captain Jack Sparrow, Captain Crunch, Captain Morgan and Captain Kangaroo all have in common? A: They are all caucasian

Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

what do michael Jackson and little boys do in the dark alone? they turn on the flashlight

Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

Why do women have boobs? So you've got something to look at while you talk to them. That's sexist... I'm sorry.

what did the poor guy get for christmas POVERTY

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

A horse, a duck, a pig, and a muslim walk into bar. The horse ducks, the duck's hoarse, the pig's in a blanket, and the muslim has a can, being surprised at how far a can can preach hate in chicago. The bartender reminds the muslim that he is keeping company with a swine, and the muslim feels offended for the poor horse.

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

Why did the clown fall off the unicycle? Because I shot him in the face.

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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