Why can't Helen Keller read? Because she is dead.

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why was the boy sad his whole family just died in a plane crash

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia And so do I..

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I hate Mondays, the man said as he drove to work. Fortunately for him, it was a Wednesday.

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What do you give a gay guy on his birthday? a invition to strait camp

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why should you not shake a baby? because if it dies it wouldnt know that its parents hate them.

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David Cameron

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What do you call Chuck Norris being killed? This is impossible so we are not give it a name.

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The black man at the narcotics anonymous meeting said, "oh, this isn't bingo is it?" then walked out of the room feeling mildly embarassed.

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How do you make a clown stop laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

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Knock knock, Who's there? The constable. Your husband was killed in a car crash.

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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Jack: Hey, you know what sucks? Jill: Vacuums Jack: Hey, you know what sucks in a metaphorical sense? Jill: Black holes Jack: Hey, you know what just isn't cool? Jill: Lava?

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why could the black person jump higher than the white person. because the white person had no legs

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Why was the black man in school detention? For sleeping in and showing up late accidently

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

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My dad is lactose intolerant. He shouldn't eat cheese.

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I used to have a shirt just like yours, except it was green. And it was a bicycle.

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Why did 5 members of the Al-Qaeda walk into the bank? To make 5 seperate cash withdrawals

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A blond, a brunet, and a red head jumped off a bridge. Which one hit the ground first? In order to solve this problem you would first need to figure out witch of the three had more of a body mass. Then you would need to calculate the accretion in case one brought along a cow. However, in the end the outcome is always the same: 3 dead bodies on impact and 3 mourning families.

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What is green and red and is going super fast? A frog in a blender.

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I slept through the Dark Knight movie....turns out I was pretty tired.

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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