Q: What's black and white and red all over? A: Someone who just got stabbed to death reading the newspaper.

what is your moms favorite website? Wait did I say mom. Oh I'm not very sorry.

How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

why does it take 2 woman with p.m.t to change a light bulb? because there both tired , feel bloated , and could do with a bar of choccy

how do you remove a black man from a car? Wash the bumper

How do you make a Dead Baby Float..... ......With 3 scoops of ice cream and 1 cup of liquid stem cells.

Q.How many blonds does it take to change a light bulb? A.1

what's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a trampoline? obviously quite a lot due to the fact that they are two completely different ideas with little to no relation to each other.

How did 3 fat women fit under 1 small umbrella and not get wet? It wasn't raining!

what did I say to myself nothing because its very weird to talk to your self

There is my brain said the English man stop leaving it in the fridge and let me mug you now get in the car OK!

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

Why did the black guy drink the kool aid? Because there was a glass of kool aid next to him and he was thirsty.

Friend's are like pinguins, they both die when you stab them in the heart.

Why do women wear perfume and makeup? They smell bad and they're ugly.

Q: Why was the american flag red, white, and blue? A:Because that's how it is!

Whats a never ending Opium for the stupid, mentally depraved un educated population? Christianity

David walks into a bar. Someone shoots him. Now hes dead.

my parents let me say words that start with sh and end in it. shit what else could it be

What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

Your mom is so nce that when you got into college she taught you to be more independent so you could succeed later in life.

Humpty the extreme sized grenade fell off the wall. The universe is now in little pathetic bits.

two guys r talking and the one said *i swear to god* and the other one said *u swear what to god what the hell r u talking about i dont even know u*

Do you play piano? No

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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