Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

What's windy and sunny at the same time? The weather.

How am I supposed to eat soup without an envelope?

How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

What do you call a popular rap and hip-hop artist? Tunde

why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

Why was the cat meowing at the chicken? Because Sally got hit by a fridge.

What's Worse Than Falling Over? .......Rape.

Once upon a time there lived 3 polar bears; a mummy polar bear, a daddy polar bear and a baby polar bear. Ond day the baby polar bear said to the daddy polar bear "I don't feel like a polar bear, I'm cold!" and the daddy polar bear said "You look like a polar bear."

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

in superbad, why couldnt seth take off mclovin's face and wear it as his own? no one can. theyre fictional characters in a movie

Q: How man Jews can you fit in a box? A:if your German than you tell me.

what did the white singer say to the black rapper? I would like to do a song with you seeing as how we have 2 separate audience types i believe this would prove the song to be successful

Why was the man attracted to other men? Because he was gay, and that is typically what happens when people are attracted to members of the same sex, and it is as natural as a man being attracted to women.

What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

What do you call Charlie Sheen when he's on drugs? Charlie Sheen.

the elephant asks the man, " how do u breathe out of that thing?" the man proceeds to explain to the elephant how he breathes out of his nose.

Why did the duck walk on the moon? Because it was his lifelong goal

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Q:Wanna know a funny joke? A:Womens Rights

A Jew, a Christian, and a Muslim walk into a bar. A good time was had by all, until closing time.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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