Why can't black people swim? Because there are sharks in the lake.

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What did the dinosaur say to the caveman? Nothing. Dinosaurs were wiped off the earth due to a tragic, world wide extinction about 65 million years ago while small mammals which would eventually evolve into humans survived.

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what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

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I don't know about the rest of you, but I HATE funerals.

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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Mom mom momie mom mom mom mom momie mother mother. What! Hi.

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What can hurt you if you pee on it? A rabid grizzly bear

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They say that there's more than one way to skin a cat...so far iv only found the one.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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KCLTLMBAIMWSSHTCAWGAHW

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A cheerio gets a job at McDonalds and after working for a while, he gets employee of the month and goes to the district ball. While there, he meets a female(frosted) cheerio whom he asks out. She refuses because she only dates frosted cheerios. So, the male goes back to work for the next year, and his boss is happy with his work, so he asks him if he would like anything. The cheerio says yes, i want to be frosted. The boss says ok, i'll make you frosted, so now that he's frosted, he goes back to the ball. He asks the same female cheerio out, she says yes this time. He then asks her if she wants something to drink, she says yes. She wants some milk. So the guy stands in line for about 15 minutes, when he gets to the front, there is no more milk left. So he asks her if she would like some tea. she says yes. So he goes and stands in line for another 15 minutes only to find out there is no more tea. So then he asks her if she would like some punch, shesays yes. So after an hour of searching, he finds out there is no punchline......

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Death by kayak

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What's the difference between your mom and a table? The table isn't a whore.

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Why don't you make like a tree, and get out of here.

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Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

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if u read this u r bent A. Now your bent

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What's the difference between a panda and a baby? I don't have a baby in my freezer

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Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

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Hey look i just made a jo... shit.

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Why did Suzie's friend put rubbish in her mouth? Because Suzie is a rubbish bin.

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There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

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Did you hear about Osama Bin Laden? He's dead.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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