''I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.''

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why did sally drown? because she had no arms or legs and couldn't swim

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Why was the black man unemployed and in debt? Because current socio-economic realities and systematic racial discrimination place him at a disadvantage in terms of education and employment. Indeed, it is statistically probable that he was raised below the poverty-line, greatly limiting his opportunities from a young age.

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How to open an orange? You don't you peal it

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Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

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Q: Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: Because it died. Q: Why did the dog fall out of the tree? A: Because it was tied to the monkey.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in your pear.

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Chuck Norris shaves with his fists. That's why he still has a beard.

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Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

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If life throws you lemons, get under some shelter so you don't get pelted by flying fruit and worry about making lemonade later.

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Stalin and Hitler went to Kmart to buy mini-toothpaste. Because they schleifen schlafanned on their way to the country club.

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Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? Because she had no arms!

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What do you call a Mexican flying a plane? A pilot

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So a dog walks into a bar.. well thats not true as most bars do not allow dogs.. oh..sorry.

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How does a black man spell Jack J-A-C-K

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knock knock. who's there? interupting doctor. interupting doctor who....you have cancer.

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who has moral fiber? a cerial killer

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Why couldn't the blonde do her homework? She had no fingers.

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Q: What do you brush your teeth with, sit on and sleep in? A: A toothbrush, a chair and a bed

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What did the unicorn eat for a snack? Nothing. Unicorns are a majestic fiction animal.

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Why did Jim go to the hospital? To get an autopsy.

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what do you call a black guy falling down a hill? A hiker with an inconveniance you racist son of a bitch

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Why do bears go to school on Sunday's? They don't, bears don't go to school.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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