What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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What did the atheist say to the jew. Well first they had a long discussion about religion and the jew was actually made an atheist. Truly the work of God.

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Why did the blonde fail her drug test? She's actually never did drugs before but since she didn't show up for appointment, that counts as an automatic fail.

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what is the best way to stand out from the croud? open up your butt hole and take a video for to put on dat jumbotron

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What's worse than putting stones in a blender? Putting a baby in a blender.

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whats worse than having the flu? having cancer

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Why was the chicken sad Thanksgiving

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What do you call a fat cat? Nothing if you are a good person

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It's bright in here *puts on? sunglasses* Ahhh, that's better...

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There was a papa tomato, a mama tomato, and a baby tomato. Coincidentally, it was also Tuesday.

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so if your riding down a big hill in your canoe and your bicycle falls out how many pancakes do you have left? you would have 200 pancakes left --sticksack

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Why is a bulldog so aggressive Because it was raised for dog fights in basements Dog fights aren't right kids, and you should never get involved but if you find yourself in the cage fighting one of the dogs, you should really think about how you got there.

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If you were in a room with Osama bin Laden, Hitler, and a black guy and you had two bullets, who would you shoot? Seeing as this situation is logically impossible considering that Adolf Hitler died in the year 1945 and Osama bin Laden was born in the year 1957, I would be in a room with just a black guy and two bullets. Then I would proceed not to shoot the black guy on the fact that I enjoy the talking and learning about cultural diversities between the black and white races.

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There was a golfer at the field where people usually golf. he had a golf club. so did the man next to him. The man i spoke of first hit the guy that was next to him with a golf club. Why? because he was angry at the man for shoving socks down his daughters throat and extracted her eyes with a melon scooper. This should not be humorous, the girl got blood and eye juice on her fathers new shoes when she came home.

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Yo mama is so fat she lost 100 pounds and now she's not fat.

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like if your cool

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What starts with 'd' and ends in 'ick'? dick -XH

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why was the girl unhappy? because she was stapled to a shark.

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Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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A man walks into a park. He gets abducted and raped by flying asparagus.

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a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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