Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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What do you call a black man flying a plane. A pilot.

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Why did the Egyptian woman not manage to work the washing machine? The instructions were in English.

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Why couldn't Jimmy go bowling with the rest of his friends? His parents shot him.

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How many anti jokes can you make from one joke? 1. 2. 3. 4. 5. 6. 7. 8. 9. 10. 11. 12. 13. 14. 15. 16. 17. 18. 19. 20. 21. 22. 23. 24. 25. 26. 27. 28. 29. 30. 31. 32. 33. 34. 35. 36. 37. 38. 39. 40. 41. 42. 43. 44. 45. 46. 47. 48. 49. 50. And so on.

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Three drunk llamas wearing sombreros are walking down the street. They walk in silence, lost in their own thoughts.

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Haikus are good poems, They don't always make sense though, I saw a squirrel.

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whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? getting stranded on an island with your best friend and realizing several days later that you will have to eat him to survive. hours after eating your friend a boat saves you and now have to live the rest of your life knowing you ate somebody.................... oh and the Holocaust

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A boy grows up loving tractors. For birthday and Christmas each year he got a tractor toy of some kind, until the age of 17, when he finally gave up tractors and got himself a CD player. One day, listening to all the latest tunes with some headphones, he looks outside to see his neighbour's house on fire. He goes outside to find firemen trying to put out the blaze. He jumps into the blazing house and inhales as much as he can, which astonishingly puts out the blaze. A fireman confusing asked "How did you do that?" The boy replies, " I'm an ex-tractor fan."

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What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

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A white man, a black man, and a brown man are all in an elevator. The white man laughs "this is like the start to a racist joke or something." The other two men strangle him because he is white.

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(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

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Q:why did jimmy fall of a swing? A:Because someone threw a fridge at him

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What do you call a penguin sliding down a hill how should i know.

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Roses are red violets are blue your dads got hair what happened to you

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My grandma has this joke where she says "knock knock." I say "who's there?" She says "I can't remember" and starts to cry

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What do you call a fish with no eye? Blind.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

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What do Miley and Bill Ray Cyrus have in common? Half their DNA

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How many black people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one

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Rose: Mom, why was I named Rose? Mom: Because when you were born a rose petal landed on your head. Rose: Than why is my brother named Brick? Mom: I liked the name.

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Why couldn't the driver start his car? Because the driver was a tree

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How many beavers does it take to paint a house blue? 0, beavers cant paint.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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