Why was the fat man crying? He was sentenced to the electric chair for a murder he didn't commit.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

Whats the difference between a monkey and a baby? Eating a baby tastes better with saltines.

(Something terribly disturbing that people find funny)

Knock Knock? Come in.

A: How can you tell a tree is an aspen? B: 'Cause of the way it is.

Knock Knock Who's there? You have AIDS.

What would you get when you cross a bear and a shark? a highly improbable situation because sharks and bears live completely different environments.

*Walk Into The Bakery* "Excuse me, sir. How much does the challah cost (holocaust)?

A black man in a hooded sweatshirt is sprinting down a back alley. He is trying to get into better shape by exercising and knows a shortcut to his house.

A man decided it was time to quit his job so he put his 2 weeks in and went to look for another job.

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

Why did Sally fly off the swing, She had no arms Knock knock *Who's there* Not Sally

Why did sally fall off the swing? Because her grandfather hit her with a wrench.

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What? Chicken butt Why? Chicken thigh Who? Deez nuts

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

Weaner

You know what makes me smile? Facial muscles.

Hey guess what? What? You're a Tree.

- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...