What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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What happened when the boy got caught with his hand in the cookie jar? He gets shot in the face by Santa.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because i shot him. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? he was in front of the monkey

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

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knock knock whos there the game __i lost the game__

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Did you hear about that man who ate 17 cheeseburgers?! I didn't.

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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My former roomate had that game, about some bald guy that can slow down time, but thats like supernatural or something.

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Quinn Grifith Randel lives in Roswell, GA

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What did the blonde order in the restaurant? A cup of coffee.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Jew?

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KANE AUDITIONS FOR BRITAINS GOT TALENT SIMON COWEL REAPES HIM

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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What did the purple dragon say to the unicorn? He doesn't say anything to the unicorn because dragons and unicorns don't exist. Even if they did exist, dragons and unicorns can't talk, unless we're talking about cartoons. Also, even if it was a cartoon or whatever, do you really think a purple dragon has ANYTHING to say to a unicorn?! Of course not! Oh look at me I'm a cool talking dragon, I have something so important to say to this unicorn. Gimme a break...

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What happened to Jillian when she walked out the door? She got hit by a bus A. Knock knock B. Whos there? A. Not Jillian

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Your mom is so fat she decided to get out of bed and exercise because she realized her health would become serious and wanted ot do something about it.

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What do you call a fish with no I Defected at birth

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whats the point of anti jokes? A: the point that it is no point

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Well, it all depends on the size of the bathtub.

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What has ears, but can't hear, eyes, but can't see, a mouth, but can't talk, and legs, but can't walk? A deaf and blind paraplegic with an improperly functioning larynx.

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What did the orphan do on his birthday? He burned down his orphanage, he hated the place because he was severly abused.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm bad at poems... Nice t*ts

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Why does the black man take drugs. Because he is very sick.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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