Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

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I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

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Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

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Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

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Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

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Why should you never attempt to rob Chuck Norris? Because he will beat you up as he knows self defense.

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What did the cute little girl get for Christmas? Raped

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How do you wake up lady gaga? poke her face.

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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"Knock Knock" "Who's There" "The Police" "The Police Who" "Ma'am your son just died in a car accident"

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why did the person cross the road? to catch the chicken

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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What did the surgeon say to the patient? Nothing. The patient died on the table.

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Yo mom is so stinky that when she gets in a room every one leaves the room

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why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

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Why did the dish run away from the spoon? None of them ran neither one has legs

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An Asian with a big dick.

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Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

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a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

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What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

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A skeleton walks into a bar and orders a whiskey sour and a mop.

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Why did the woman go out of the kitchen? She did not because she had a curse put on by a man off the streets of Greek row a Yale that said u may never leave the closest kitchen near this very spot, and it turns out that the closest kitchen was in a frat house across the street so now she is stuck in the kitchen making sandwiches for all the frat bros at this Yale frat house, So basically she was in her place

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A black man walks into a bar with a lovely parrot on his shoulder. The bartender asks "hey where did you get that Africa says the parrot...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops