You know what really chaps my ass? Thongs.

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Knock Knock! "Use the friggin' doorbell!"

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Why do cow say moo? Because you touch yourself at night

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Why did the black man go to portugal? Because he was very hard working and needed a vacation.

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What did the elephant say to the naked man? "Cute, cute, but can it pick up peanuts?"

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Why a polar bear fell over? He drank so much

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why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

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there once was a little boy who lived in a little house with his little parents who ate little food. one day the boy went on a website called antijokes and he started to read a joke, by the time he had gotten to the end of the joke he realized that there was no punchline but it was very lenghty and quite pointless.

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Roses are read, Violets are blue, I have aids, now so do you

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your face belong in the zoo, don't worry I get there too, not in the cage, just visiting you :)

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Knock Knock Who's there? Santa Santa who? Imwatching you!

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My gifts to my gf included: A diamond ring, a sports car, a house in malibu, a new credit card, a private jet, but most importantly, a Refrigerator.

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What sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler.

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Your mumma's so fat she is fat

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Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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Q:why is steven balmont gonna beat up mr fatty goral A:because hes a fat czech Shout out to my mandem lewis hall&moses

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An englishman, an irishman amd a scotsman were walking down the street. What a fine example of unionism

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Whats the difference between platinum blondes? Absolutley nothing they all look exactly the same.

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

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What do you get when you cross isopropil alcohol,ammonia; dish detergent fluid, water, vinegar, and lemon oil? Window Cleaner.

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A black man accidentally walks into a white man. They apologize to each other and carry on with the rest of their day.

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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