What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

Whats the hardest part of a vegetable to eat?? The WheelChair

Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

A dancer walks into a barre

what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven was black.

Four blonds are driving to Disneyworld. They got in a crash and died.

a blind man walks down the street and trips on an unsuspecting curb he scraped his knee

Jack be nimble, Jack be quick, Jack has a crippling addiction to Cocaine which ultimately led to his divorce and the subsequent loss of custody of his children.

One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. The fight began and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing you say when you don't want to fight anymore and you let the other person win?" The other guy says to the challanger, "I give up?" Then the challenger yells. "I WIN!"

Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

Knock, Knock. Who's there? Dave. Dave who? Dave proceeds to break into tears as his grandmother's Alzheimers has progressed to the point where she can no longer remember him.

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

“DTF”? Says Will. “No” says Harper.

Sigh, at times like this I begin to ponder what I am doing with my life. I do not look that much like some anime character thingie, she is awfully cute for a anime character though.

what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

How do you make a blond cry? You punch her in the face.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...