What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

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What would George Washington say if he were alive today? WHAT THE **** IS WRONG WITH THIS COUNTRY!

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When a mommy and a daddy love each other very much... and after being married for 39 years... They get divorced

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Friend: Do you want to go to the bar or see a movie first? Me: Yes.

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What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

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Don't you hate it when you have 5 dead bodies, and you don't know which one to shoot your load on? -no

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How do you tell if an albino baby is black? Check his genetics.

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What do black people and tornadoes have in common? - It only takes one to destroy a neighborhood.

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whats worse than a pile of dead babies?...... A carrot

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Q: what's worse then stubing yout toe? A: getting raped by godzilla

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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i know the best knock knock joke! you start! other person: knock knock me: whos there ........

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. Fortunately, the bra was on display in a clothing store and was not actually being worn at the time.

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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Yo mama so fat because it's in her genes.

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Why cant the guy drink his beer Because he hasnt opened it yet

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Roses are red Violets are blue I love you so much That is a an example of the 2nd person and the identification of plants and their colors

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Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

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What time is it when you run out of ice cream? Time to get more ice cream.

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What do the holocaust and new born babies have in common? Nothing. Except some babies are born in Germany.

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A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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When life gives you lemons, That's physically impossible. Life cannot physically hand you lemons.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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