Q: When there's something strange In your neighbourhood, Who you gonna call? A: The Local Authorities!

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What do you call a black guy selling drugs? A pharmacist.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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What do you call a muslim with a gun I dont know his name

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There's a redhead, a brunette and a woman with green hair walking down the street. A man asks them how they all came to have such beautiful and vibrant hair color. The redhead smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The brunette smiles, runs a hand through her hair and replies "It's natural!" The woman with green hair blows her nose, and replies "It isn't natural, I'm rebelling against society's conformist ideals. Also I was not loved enough as a child." She has a cold.

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Q: What was the last thing to enter the bug's mind as it flew into the windshield? A: His back legs.

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Why'd the cop pull over the black person? He made a traffic infraction.

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a blond goes into a taxi, the driver asks where to my friend , the blond says her desired location, gets droped off and trips, falls on her head, suffers major injuries, dies,weeks later the taxi driver drove the family to the funeral, they walk out and one of of them trips and gets back up...

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Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

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What did the frog say to the other frog Your a chode

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Its crackers to slip a rozer and dropsey in snide.

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Your momma is so fat, she should be concerned about her increased risk if a heart attack because of her poor eating habits.

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A man walks into the bar. It was typical day and nothing interesting happened.

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Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

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What's white and sticky.... Jizz

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Why did Hitler Commit suicide? Because he was completely depressed and overwhelmed by the fact he had lost World War II.

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Why was little Alice and her family at the graveyard? Well someone had to come at her funeral...

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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Why is the sky blue? Time to get a watch.

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Hi

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How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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What did the pregnant 16 year old get for her birthday? A miscarriage

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What did the dead woman say to the murderer nothing dead people cant talk

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops