Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side

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1,2,3,4,5..what comes next? yeah you should know how to count

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Your moms so fat she struggles to to everyday tasks

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Q: What did the boy say to the girl? A: Wanna go to homecoming?

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What's as hard as a rock? A rock

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what happened when joey asked the teacher to go to the restroom? The Teacher said "yes you may go to the restroom," not even putting into consideration that joey was a ginger and discriminating him because of it.

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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What do you call a Gay leprechaun? A homosexual ginger man with a pretty green outfit.

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Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's a free drink, you'll wake up in my basement.

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What did the black man say to the white man when the white man was drunk and naked on the roof dancing? Quit fucking around Brad and get off my roof or I'm calling the police because this is the third time this month.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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Why did the black man go to the back of the bus? The only unoccupied seats were back there.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? Depends on the polar bear and its dietary habits

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What did the jewish man say to the Irish guy at the bar? Are you Irish?

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Why did Susie drop her ice cream? Because she got hit by a bus. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Susie.

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My Texting Convos: "Heyy!" "Hi!" "Watz up?" "nm hbu?" "Same here!" "Koolio!(: So wrud?" "Nothing. Just texting you!" "Yea! Same! I'm so bored! And tired!" "Ikr!" "Yupp!" *No one answers. When this is what you really want: "I love you soooo much!" "Awwwwh!<3 I loe you too!" "Do you wanna go out?(;" "YES!!(:" "ily<3" "iyl2<3" *convo goes on forever(: Moral: Purple tomatoes are books of yellow buttons on hands(;

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Person 1: I'm really sleepy. Person 2: Then go to sleep.

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What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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Q. why did the black man cross the road? A. Cause there is no law saying he cant

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What did the deaf girl get for Christmas? Nothing, she was Jewish

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"I love you terribly!" said the girl to her new boyfriend. "You already had me chained to the bed. You didn't have to break both of my legs, Kathy Bates."

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What noise does a Chinese roller coaster make? Chink Chink Chink Chink chink.....

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What did the fat girl mean when she said, " last night was amaziing?" that pizza pie you shared was very well crafted and baked

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Howmany licks does it take till you get to the tootsie roll center of tootsie pop? Well, The answer is not constant. There are many variables that need to be taken into account. Though the ph level of human saliva is a neutral seven it can vary about 2 tenths of a point from person to person. This is a factor that needs to be considered along with the size of the tongue, roughness of the tongue, and at what speed the licking is taking place at. After taking all these variables into consideration, the average number of licks it would take untill the chocolate center of a tootsie pop is approximately, 3 .

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops