Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

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What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

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I once saw a small Italian man wearing trainers with a smart suit. He looked like an idiot, but I considered the option that he may not have had any money left after buying the suit to buy shoes. Exercising diplomacy, I left him be and enjoyed a nice meal with he and his trainers.

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Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

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If Johnny has 4 dollars and Clarissa has 7 dollars, how many dollars do they have all together? 11 dollars Knock knock Who's There? Johnny Johnny who? Johnny and Clarrisa, all together we have 11 dollars.

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Oh, go away

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why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

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What do you call a black man with no arms? Trustworthy.

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What did the talking muffin say to the other talking muffin? Ah! A talking muffin!

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Person1: Man I had the worst day ever. Person2: Worser than the holocaust.

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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Isn't a coincidence that the signing of the Declaration of Independence and the 4th of July are on the same day? Weird

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what do you call the quadriplegic man who went water skiing? Skip

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Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

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I like my wine like I like my women. Not at all.

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What's the difference between a radio and a bowl of potato salad? If you put batteries on a radio you can turn it on and listen to some music. If you put batteries on a bowl of potato salad it's not gonna give you any music.

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What would Bruno Mars do if he was on the moon? Gasp and grab his throat in an attempt to get oxygen flowing into his lungs with no avail.

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Why did the man die after getting his picture taken The camera was a gun

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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Yo mama is so old, the bone structure of her spine has decayed significantly since she stopped growing and has therefore shrunken in height considerably. Her face and hands have accumulated abundant visual wear; wrinkles, and has arthritis as well.

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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josh- your a strange boy. liam- yes. due to by up bringing i have been exposed to unusual situations that most people do not encounter therefore affecting how i behave. Secondly the definition of normal is varying from person to person making being normal to every human being difficult to even the most capable of people. Essentialy Josh i care little for you comment. *josh was a black man who died of cancer 6 weeks after this incodent*

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what would happen if american army lost their air supprt ? lmao

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A priest and rabbi walk into a bar. The priest leaves because they don't have wine.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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