Why did Sally fall of the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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A blonde asks, "How come i cant get this to go in there?" However no one replies because no one is there.

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what did a poor guys get for christmast ? brain tumor.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm bad at poetry, ELEPHANTS!

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relatable: school : 2+2=4 Homework: 2+4+2=8 Exam: oscer has 4 apple his train was 7 min early now caulate the mass of the sun

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Whats green and fuzzy and will kill you if it falls out of a tree? A pool table

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What's the difference between a statue and a real human? The statue can't run if the birds shit on it.

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A black guy, a mexican, and an arab are all in the same car, Whos driving the car? The black guy because he politely offered and his friends were happy to ride with him.

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A man rode into town on Friday and came out on Friday how did he manage this? He stayed for a couple of hours

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A man goes to the pound to adopt a dog and sees a very shaggy dog and says "WOW! Thats a shaggy dog I'll take it!" So the man takes home his new dog and decides to enter the dog in the towns anual shaggy dog contest. and wins. After winning the town shaggy dog contest he moves up to the county shaggy dog contest. theres no competition. Now the man and his dog enter into the state shaggy dog contest, the states shaggiest dogs are all competing. the man wins. Finally the man and his dog are in the prestigious national shaggy dog contest. The judge walks up to the man and says "your dog isn't very shaggy"

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What starts with F and ends with U-C-K? Firetruck

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Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

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Thats so awesome, I was totally not not going to tell you and when I saw I did not not type it I totally did it anyways, but why did it last even though stuff timed out? I am like so wet.

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What do you call a plane going to Africa with 100 black people on it? A plane, the contents of the plane is irrelevant...

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How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

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Q: Whats a spanish teacher who cant speak spanish A: duhh. it called an english teacher

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HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

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Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Getting yours asshole clawed by a grizzly

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I FEEL LIKE I'M RIDING ON A CLOUD actually it's physically impossible to ride on clouds because they are sparsely situated ice particles.

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what do you do when a blond throws a grenade at you? run

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops