if u ever get arrested by cop, just tell the cop this: "No no officer, you got it all wrong. It was only a game. It's called RAPE."

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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why did the cow cross the road because pigs were not flying i had to write it hurts

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Why couldn't the pirate go to the movies? He had scheduling conflicts

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Why did the monkey fall off? It had no more lives. Why did the second monkey fall off? I dunno. Why did the third monkey fall off? Since the second was unknown, the third does not exist. Why did the little girl died? It's pretty obvious.

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Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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what happened to the man that no one cares about? No one cares

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My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

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bite me

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Why was the black man pulled over on his way to KFC? Because he ran a red light.

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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Hey! Do you like fishsticks? Me too :)

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

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How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

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What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

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What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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