how many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? --probably just one, unless cerebral palsy runs in her blood, therefore her aid would assist her.

What's the diffrence between a hockey puck, and an african child? They're both black, but usualy african children aren't round!

just a man and his thoughts....and a smart phone app, and a loving family, thats not the point.

2 guys at a funeral. "did you know the girl?" asks one of the guys. "No" replies the other. "Me neither."

Why did the gay kid drop his ice cream Because he got punched in the face.

A black guy, a Mexican, an Arab and a white guy walk into a room and embrace cultural diversity.

Why did the first Monkey fall out of the tree? He was dead. Why did the second Monkey fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Monkey. Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

How are elephants and plumbs the same? A: They are both purple, except for the elephant.

Why did the duck cross the road? It followed the chicken.

Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

Timmy eats 32 cookies and eats 30 of them. What does he have? Type 2 Diabetes.

What do u when life gives u lemons? U put them in your iced tea.

what do you call your mama at the gas station

What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

What is black, white, and red all over? A penguin that someone shot with red paintballs.

Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

What's worse than being forced to drink your own urine and eat a disabled kids poop? James Holmes (Ironic that the text I had to type in to post this was "I'M BATMAN".)

I'm not saying your mom's ugly, but I like pancakes.

Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

what do you call a blind man who buys a caller i.d.? handicapped

how many jews can you fit in a car? 2 in the front and 3 in the back depending on how many people decide to go

a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

When is a car not a car? When it's scrapped and turned into license plates.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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