Roses are red, Violets are red, OH SHIT MY GARDENS ON FIRE

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A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

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Why was the Mexican sleeping? He wishes to decrease his risk of motor vehicle accidents.

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why did the teacher quit her job and become a musician? Because her class was very mean to her and growing up she had always wanted to play music

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what was so bad about hitler? he inadvertently subjected his political officials to death by rope

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A family walks into a talent agency. Talen agent says "Okay, what's your act called?" Dad replies "The Aristocrats!"

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Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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Wath black poeple eat for christmas your food.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Son: i like gaming Mom: you are wasting your life *son jumps in trash can

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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Knock Knock Who's There? Ted. Oh, Hey Ted.

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What's a worse place to be besides the friendzone? On your grandmas lap crying because your parents just died in a car crash.

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What did the Albino get for Christmas? Hair dye.

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why couldnt the jew play basketball? He was handicapp

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If these walls could talk - the public would pay large sums of money to see this marvel of science. On a more serious note, they might also tell the cops about the many dead hookers stowed within them.

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Why did Lucy fall off the swing set? Because she died. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Lucy.

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What is the difference?

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i get knocked down, but i don't get up again. my leg is broken and therefore makes it extremely difficult for me to stand up on my own.

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Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

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What is up, the color blue and has a face? the sky. there is no face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops