What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

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what is bad about being a black jew? you have to sit in the back of the oven

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T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

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How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

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A stranger pulls up next to a little boy walking home from school. The stranger offers the boy a ride home. The boy says yes, gets in the car, and is driven home as promised

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How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

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What's black, blue, and read all over? The newspaper.

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Q:What's brown and tastes like shit? A:Shit

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

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Who is the fastest kid in AA? Alex Solomos

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Well, its allright then, just tired that is all, leave it be, I mean what if your wife sees it? What will she think?

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What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

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Why couldn't the girl eat her pizza? She had no face.

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How do you remind your kids of family? You brand them with the family crest.

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why couldnt the baby walk through the door? because it had a javeline through its head.

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What's most weird about necrophilia? They copulate with dead bodies.

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Your momma's so stupid, she has a lower than average IQ!

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Why are there no casinos in Africa? Because of the exceptionally high poverty rate.

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What is black and white, and red all over? I don't know that's why I was asking.

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It works on whoever I have an emotional attachment with, for example people might be thinking you and I write in the exact same style, but I am actually copying your way of typing (spelling, word composition etc) this because we relate on a deep emotional level with people that like "get us" because they can act and behave like us. This again doubles the effect of the hypnosis, since when I get "super high on trance" and you feel that way, well, we both reach into the same wavelength, literally. Scientists and hypnotists supposedly have no idea as to why this happens, but I know, it is because our brain patterns are so similar, that even though we are at a long distance, your body believes itself to be an extension of mine and the other way around. How do I know this? Yogurt.

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A very rich man had a daughter whom all of the men in town wanted to marry her for wealth. Except there was one man who wanted to marry her due to his love for her. The father let his daughter marry whomever she wanted from all of the men in town, and she chose a man named Wilson Fremblington who wanted to marry her for wealth, because he was physically fit and overall a friendly man.

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Uh... Justin, the most pointless man... I gotta cringe for a moment, I don't want to be mean here, but I think my body cell total opinion pool dropped a large quantity there, its not that I do not want you anymore, but, my body`s mass body cell total is kinda denying me... Actually I am denying IT... ACTUALLY WE ARE DENYING EACH OTHER, (which is totally awesome, united denial fighting against one another FOR DENYING THE MOST! BECAUSE COOPERATION IS FOR PUSSIES!) Anyway, hell I am dead tired, oh yeah, Justin... Man, Uh, who where you again?

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was black.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Never mind that. I have a gun and your child. Come out with all your valuables and he won't get hurt.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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