I'm rubber and you're glue, neither one of us say anything because inanimate objects can't talk.

A man walks into a bar. Something funny happens.

What's the difference between a tree and a lamp? One is a tree, one is a lamp.

Knock knock Fuck off!

What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

DO U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD BIRD BIRD, BIRD IS THE WORD? DON'T U KNOW ABOUT THE BIRD? EVERYOBODY KNOWS THAT THE BIRD IS THE WORD! Oh, no i did not know that the bird was the word.

Q: What's orange, hairy, and covered with gasoline? A: Definitely not a chair.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Daisy's are white, Metallica.

why did the crops die? because a deranged clown sprayed them with liquid nitrogen.

So, there's a black man, an Asian man and an Irishman who are in a bar, politely discussing wether the Asian's phone would break if it was thrown from a plane in the Pacific Ocean. The black man says "Of course it would break." The Irishman says "I have no opinion on this..." The Asian man says "I think it would break, you are right John." Suddenly, a man enters.

So, a man walks into a bar. His alcoholic habits are slowly tearing apart his marriage.

Why are ginger's jokes not funny? Because they're gingers.

What do you call a orange BAD GRAMMER

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

Four blondes began their road trip from NYC to Europe and promptly drowned.

Q. What do you call a headless boy in a river A. A headless boy, in a river.

Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

Did you hear about the guy that had his entire left side cut off? He's all right now. Dead but all right.

Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

Knock knock. Who's there? The bailiffs, we have come to take your house

How do you get a blond out of tree? Shoot her in the head.

Lollies are sweet warheads are sour, open your legs and feel my power

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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