How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

What happened to the boy with cancer? He died.

Knock Knock Who's There Mailman Mailman who? Sir, I don't have time for this, take your mail.

How are a black man and a banana similar? They are both intelligent human beings, except for the banana.

Why did the blond get fired from her job at the M&M factory? Because she threw out all the M&M's with W's on them.

Q. Why did the lotion soothe the person's skin? A. Because its ingredients were selected because of their propensity to soothe skin.

What is small, red all over and gets shorter by the second? A baby cutting its hair with a potato peeler

did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

Why was the African American man afraid of dogs? He had a terrible childhood memory of being violently dry humped by a german shepherd.

What do you call a white guy in a mostly black neighborhood? His name.

Two girls are in a car together. The one in the drivers seat is texting while driving. The girl in the passengers seat notices this and tells her the she should put it away in case of a risk of a collision. She apologizes and puts it away and the two of them drive to the store unharmed and continued their normal day.

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

What color is the grass on Bob's lawn? Bob lives in a apartment.

How do you confuse a girl? Easily.

Knock, Knock whos there? Jesus Jesus who? Jesus Christ

Why did the black man go to Jail? He was visiting his friend!

What's it called when One Direction wins a Grammy Award? It's never going to happen; so why give it a name?

What happens when you search andreas' mum in google? You are redirected to man porn

What did one lawyer say to the other? We are both lawyers. What did the stupid lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both pineapples.

How do you stop a black person from drowning?.. Take your foot off his head

I wear my sunglasses at night. I'm always getting into car accidents.

What did the horse say to the other horse? Nothing, they're both horses

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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