A man walks into a bar with a chicken on his head the bartender asks the man why do you have a chicken on your head the man replies the chicken is thirsty

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What do you get when a black man crosses a white man on the street? A black man and a white man on the street..

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What did Marsha say when she ate the apple pie? Nothing. It would be rude for her to talk with her mouth full.

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a man touches girls butt ...... she sharts her pants

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Why did billy fall off his bike? Because billy was a loaf of bread.

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Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

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Roses are black, Violets are black, I'm blind.

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This is Axel, if you are who I think you are, you are late.

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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hey guess what? what ur gay! how did you know ive been in the closet for 5 years!?

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What ryhmes with turtle? räpe

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what did the apple say to the orange? nothing, stupid, apples can't talk

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Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

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why did the hobo want cancer so badly? he really needed a haircut

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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what is black and green and rainy all over? the democratic republic of congo

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What's worst than a worm in your apple? Finding your mom in a porno.

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What do you call a Caucasian in Russia? Russian.

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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Why did the man go to McDonalds? Because he was a pedophile.

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Q: Why was the boy sad? A: An Elephant was sitting on his face

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Chuck Norris and 2 other cowboys were out in the old west. After a long day of travel in the desert, the three of them set up camp for the night. Having sat around their fire silently for some time, the first of the cowboys decided to speak up. "You know," he said, "I believe I am the manliest man here! Why, this one time I was riding all alone through the desert on my manly horse when I stumbled upon a town that had no name. Upon entering the town, I realized that the townspeople were in a panic. Everyone was fleeing for their lives and screaming. So I grabbed the nearest woman to me around the neck and demanded of her, 'What the hell is going on around here?!!!' The woman, terrified, only managed to stammer and point. Low and behold, there was a wild bull skewering people through the heart. So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and grabbed the bull by the horns and looked him straight in the eyes, broke his neck, crushed his testicles, rammed my fist into his chest, pulled out his heart and ate it! That is how much of a man I am!" There was silence quite for a while. Soon the other cowboy cleared his voice and said: "You, know, that's pretty good, but I am more of a man than that! Why, this one time, me and a few of my manly buddies were off on a horse trip. I was bringing up the rear of the line when all of a sudden I heard a commotion at the front of the line. Kicking my fine horse with my spurs, I raced ahead to see what was the matter. Low and behold, there was a twenty-foot rattler that had consumed my friend whole! So, what did I do? I got down off my tall horse and ran over to the snake, grabbed him around the neck, crushed his testicles, bit off his head, sucked the venom from its cold, lifeless body and then spit it upon the dry ground like acid! That is how much of a man I am!" After this, there was another silence. The two cowboys looked one another over, each recognizing the other to be a fine specimen of what it is to be a man. They then both patiently waited to hear Chuck Norris' response. But there was only silence. Off in the distance an owl hooted. A coyote howled. Still, silence. Chuck Norris didn't say a word; he merely continued to sit calmly and stir the coals of the fire with his penis.

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Guy walks into a bar. He orders a drink called "Vampire poison". The bartender gives him the drink. The man drinks it and dies. No he was not a vampire, he was just a man with a history of heart failures.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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