Why'd Sally fall of the swing? Sally's a fish.

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Q. What has 5 chins, 10 eyes, 10 feet, and 50 fingers? A. Five People.

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Did you hear about the three black guys who got run over by a car? No? Neither did Ray Charles!

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What did the unicorn say to the horse? I have a horn and you don't.

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What's worse than getting no up-votes on an anti-joke? Getting down votes

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Why did the little boy fall down the stairs? I pushed 'em.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Well for a chicken to cross a road there would need to be a farm right next a road and, the fence in the farm would have to be torn for the chicken to get out and the chicken would probably end up not crossing the road because of cars.

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This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

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How do you spot a paedophile in a playground? You don't, there are usually a lot of adults around.

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Twitter: @TotalJokes: "So it's been 11 years since the planes hit the world trade centre, time really does fly by."

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Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

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Don`t be mean? WOMAN! DO YOU NOT HOW TERRIBLE THE DEMAND YOU MAKE IS? ...Fine alright, I wont leave you hanging then... So I wont call. Moral: "Seriously though, I am leaving too, but I want the top comment"

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Rap. Skate. Smoke.

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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roses are red violets are blue i am retarded i like pancakes

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Listen Nero, I understand now that this is your real name, actually I know where you live thanks to the good old phonebook... ...My order is fully based on respecting and treating all living beings equally and focusing on actually putting old notions such as Gods and superstition away in order to strengthen humankind`s belief in itself and others. As for Nerometal, well, that was one of my... Lesser followers, I assure you they have been taken care off, they will not be bothering you ever again. What would it take for you to forgive our transgressions? Money? Power? Ask and you shall receive, as far as your identity goes, you shall have it back and I shall use another site in the future.

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What do u get when u lick chicken Answer- Your a retard if you did not figure it out it is obviously chicken taste DERP!

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How do you kill a black man There is many ways

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why do muslims always turn to their left? Because they don't have their rights.

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How do you get to the store, if your car is broken down? Steal a blind girls bike, she can't ride it anyway!

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What's black, white and red all over? A nun that's just been shot.

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What do you call a orphan with no arms or legs in the middle of the ocean? Scrood

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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