An Irishman walks into a club. "Ow, that was almost as painful as that time I walked into a bar."

What did the lawyer say to the doctor? - I am a lawyer and you're a doctor.

Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

a man walks into a bar, only it was an alternate universe so there were dogs running the bar. the bartender dog called human control because it was unsanitary to have a human in a bar. the human was then escorted out by another dog and was taken to a hotel where he received no continental breakfast.

What's worse than your console not switching on? A mutilated body.

Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

There was 3 friends named Crap, Manners, and Shut up. They all had mental mothers.

Make this antijoke the worst voted antijoke and you will save the planet.

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

An armadillo walks into a bar, and shouts "I hear you don't serve armadillos." "That is correct," the bartender replies.

what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

What did the blonde say when she fell out of a tree? Nothing, she shattered her trachea upon landing.

today in aa we were telling stories one of them was: that a girl put a wet cat (to dry it) in the oven

Q:Why did the little girl jump in the pool and drown? A:because she didn't know how to swim

Why is the sky blue? You like men.

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

Is that a banana in your pocket, or do you just have an erection?

Why was the baby crying? Because he was tied to a railroad track. How did the baby die? He had a bomb strapped to him. How did the bomb explode? It got ran over by a train.

Wooooah! Thats literally the sound I made, anyway, can you like type the entire story in one setting, I feel weird, did you just try to hypnotize me? Anyway, are you trying to, woah, I am like high now...

I wondered why the piano was getting bigger. Then it hit me... I'm sorry I have visual agnosia

Jesus can can WALK on WATER, but Chuck Norris can SWIM in it.

Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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