This statement is false.

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Mr Mac reminds me that no matter how hard you try you will always lose your hair

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What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand, as asks the man running the stand, "Hey, got any grapes?" The man suffers a heart attack from the shock of a talking duck

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- Mommy look, I built a sandcastle! - Who cares, you have cancer.

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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Roses are gray Violets are black Don't judge me I'm color blind>.>

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What's worse than dropping a dollar down the drain? Getting constantly tortured for hours non-stop by getting your eyebrows plucked out one by one and getting your teeth pulled out and getting your arms cut open by a razor and getting your nose twisted off and getting your nipples ripped off by a pair of pliers and getting your toenails scraped off by a knife and getting a needle shoved into your eyes and getting a sword stuffed up your arse and getting your penis split in two like a hotdog and getting your balls smashed up by a sledgehammer so the sperm inside goes everywhere. I think that would be worse than dropping a dollar down the drain.

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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Why was the door opened? Because I opened it

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THIS ONE TIME MY DOG ATE A WHOLE CHEESECAKE

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What happens when you search andreas' mum in google? You are redirected to man porn

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How do you kill Lady Gaga? There is no point in trying, she is too heavily guarded.

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Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Nobody because a pineapple is not a proper home

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato

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Why can't black people get sunburned? Natural selection allowed ancient Africans to develop a darker skin shade that would counter strong UV rays.

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How many candles did Johnny blow out on his birthday cake? The same number of candles which corresponds to his age.

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hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

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"Knock Knock" "Who's there?" "Knock Knock Knock" "Knock knock Knock who?" "Just let me in, you twat, it's freezing out here!"

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Why would a dog sniff another dog's butt hole? Because that is what they do.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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