There was an Englishman, a Scotsman, and an Irishman. Now there's millions of them. And women too.

What's funnier than Tom Cruise laughing like a badass? Chuck Norris

Walt disney Walks Into A Bar, The Bartender says "WOAH ITS WALT DISNEY!"

Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

Why is Apple so successful? Well, that is not a question that can be answered simply. Many factors are involved in this, including but not limited to marketing, customer support, and smart business strategy. For more information, please visit Apple's website.

how many girlfriends does robert dupra have? none becomes his sister doesn't count trololololol

How do you describe a cranky rapist? Cranky and rapist

A Jewish person had a robber in their house. Who broke in? Adolf Hitler

A dog walks into a bar, the bartender asks, "why the long face?" The dog replies, "because I am a dog you idiot, my face always looks like this"

What do you call a Jew talking on a cellphone ? Well one should mind his/her business and shouldn't call people names and discriminate against them on religious or ethnic grounds .

Why did the woman throw a stick of butter out her window? She was mentally unstable.

What's worse than reading? A lot, but there are too many things to name

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

Knock knock I don't even have a door just walk in

why did the man break his arm? he didn't, someone else broke it for him

Awesome! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> minecraftnow.us <

Are you from Africa because you sure look likes you've got Ebola

How do you make a pool table laugh? You cant it is'nt a living thing which means emotions.

a black man pays his child support

whats worse than dropping your toast butter side down ? being ripped apart from the anus upwards by a large black man

Why do undertakers wear ties? Because their profession is very serious, and it is important that their appearance has a degree of gravitas.

Knock knock Who's there Guess who? Billy, is that you? Yeah baby I'm home! OMG!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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