How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

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Why doesn't Julius Caesar ever use a cell phone? Because he died in 44 BC.

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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Little molly says she wants to have a baby when she grows up because her little baby brother died of ta-sacs 6 months after birth.

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ah-ah. the proper response to an anti joke.

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What do you call a clown with no sense of humor? Unemployed.

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How do u get high, meet a leprachaun, and touch a rainbow? U find a leprechaun shoot him, steal his pot, and run up the rainbow silly!

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whats black and strange a paki

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What did the black man get for Christmas? A felony conviction.

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Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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How do you have se with hellen keller? Very sweetly

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What day is it today? Today. Thank you. You're welcome.

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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Roses are red Violets are blue I haven't been able to deal Since the day that I lost you. Now these roses bleed red And these violets cry blue I think of you in memories Do you think of me too?

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Q. Why did the man walk away from his wife? A. Because he wanted to walk away from his wife.

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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Q Why did the chicken cross the road? A Because it couldn't fly

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Why did Hitler kill himself? He realized what he'd gotten himself into and became severely depressed

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Why did the boy jump of the cliff? He was following the others

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Why was Sally in a wheelchair? Her abusive father beat her repeatedly with a rake.. Then as she crawled out the door to try and get help, the abusive father took his Dodge Ram and ran over her legs reapeatedly. Then began to slap her. Luckily, a vigilante saw the whole thing and slaughtered the father with an axe and carefully escorted Sally to the hospital. After a couple of weeks of beautiful and extraordinary care, Sally made a full recovery and was able to leave.. and all patients have to leave in a wheelchair

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An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

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Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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