roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

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why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

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Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

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What's worse than finding half a suicide tablet in your apple? Finding half a worm.

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So Colton Yepma walks in to Accounting and proceeds to read jokes

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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The secret to McDonalds success is all their customers are to fat to leave

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What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

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Roses are red, Violets are violet.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

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Why do thieves shower before undertaking a robbery? Probably part of their morning routine.

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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A black man logs on to facebook. He checks his news feed then logs off

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What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

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A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

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2 black guys, a colombian guy and a white girl are sitting at a bar. They are friends.

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When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

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What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

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Why did the plane crash? Because a loaf of bread was the pilot.

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How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

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what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

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Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

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What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

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Why was the Mexican man in the rich man's garden? Because he enjoys flowers.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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