What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong WALKS on the moon. Michael Jackson rapes little boys

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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A man walks into a bar. It was his push-up bar that he didn't install high enough. He bumps his head and it hurts.

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Who's Juan? DIS ONE

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How did Ronald McDonald die He was hit by a big mac

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The awkward moment when you are reading these jokes and either it's not funny or you don't get it...

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Why couldn't Bob pick up his pen? Because a nuclear bomb just set off where he lives and it incinerated everything.

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Why was Justin Beiber Booed off the stage. Because I spelt his last name incorrectly.

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Q: What starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? A: "Fred is raping your sister with a puck."

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Q: When did the man realize it was 5:00am? A: When it became 5:00am.

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Tilt your screen back .

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What did the little boy do when he got his test grade? Cried, it was 0

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Imagine yourself in a box with no windows and no doors. How do you get out? Stop imagining.

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what did mickee utley say to micheal bane cnb

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A homophobic man walks into a bar and the bartender asks: "what can I get for ya?" the man replies: "shut up gaylord"

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What did the man say when he saw a alien? "Look its a Alien"

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what's worse than a dead baby? a pile of dead babies. what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath? the live one has to eat it's way out. what's worse than a pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out? more dead babies dumped on the already existing pile. what's worse than the giant pile of dead babies with a live one underneath that has to eat it's way out, but there are more dead babies piled on top? this is all in your basement.

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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XD I TOTALLY CANT BELIEVE I FELL FOR THAT ONE! XD IT WAS LIKE SO OBVIOUS! XD

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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