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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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A man walks into a police station with a gun... He is there to turn it in, he found it on the side of the road and realized that this situation would best be handled by the proper authorities.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Who Who who? Hoodini

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What kind of king has 2 heads? A card!

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wat does T.J.C.S. Mean? leave an comment to answer

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? Clearly the only answer is because he's blind

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Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

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How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Wanna hear the orphan joke knock knock who's there? not you parents

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What's better than "Friday" by Rebecca Black? Hitler's kill/death ratio

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How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

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What is the worst party ever? Nazi.

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Q: What did the nazi say to hitler? A: You like my Auschwitz?

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What's the difference between a baby and my trampoline? I take my boots off before i jump on my trampoline. . .

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Q:Why couldn't little Bobby read the bible? A: His parents weren't into religion and he was blind

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A man walks into a bar He's an alcoholic and it's ruining his family

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Whats the difference between a girl and a guy? one receives and one delivers.

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What's more fun than nailing a baby to a wall? Pulling it off.

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Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

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Whats more funny than 1 bomb on 8 babies? 8 bombs on 1 baby.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense, Refrigerator Sex

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Why did the short man fall down the stairs? He got shot in the face with an assault rifle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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