How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? One second let me count them.

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A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

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A man had two kids who he loved very much but would always come home in a bad mood. On a Friday after returning home, he tells his wife, "I hate my life," then proceeds to take his anger out on her. If you were expecting for this to be a joke, then you clearly have some messed up humor. Abuse in the household isn't to be taken lightly.

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joe paterno doesn't walk into a police station

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White NBA players.

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there was once a time before tht time when there wasnt bonerss there were erectionss CC

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what did the soup kitchen give people for christmas Meatloaf] -Fluzturnusturbusturcusterdustur

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why did javonne choose club getaway madonna wanted to foster

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What's brown and sticky? A black man covered in syrup.

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What's worse than Bogans? Boat people.

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What do you call two spaniards talking in French. Bilingual.

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A pirate walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Hey, did you know you have a steering wheel down your pants?" The pirate replies, "Arrrgh, there's been a horrible nautical accident. Please call an ambulance immediately."

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A blond walked into a bar. A guy picker her up and then they had sex.

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How did Helen Keller's parents discipline her? Hopefully not too sternly. There's not much trouble a blind and deaf girl can get into, one would imagine.

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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What's Red, Smells like Blue Paint, What tastes like the sea, and has been doused in the essence of the 80's? If you can come up with something, don't bother; This is a trick question. The space was to give you time to think. Forget your answer.

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What's been hit millions of times? A woman married to an abusive husband.

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A plane crashes on the border of the U.S. and Canada, where were the deceased buried? It turns out that there were passengers of several different nationalities on board, all of which were buried in their respective homelands.

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A black, Kenyan man enters a race. He comes in second to last as he didn't practice as much as the other contestants.

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Why was the sock sad? Impossible. Socks dont have emotions.

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how do you make a cat get out of a tree you shot it

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Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs going down a mountain? A: As good as dead.

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what's the difference between a zebra and a horse They are spelled differently

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What did the biker do when he heard about Kony 2012? He became a social activist and did his part by contributing to the cause.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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