How do you wake up lady gaga? Poke 'er face.

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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whats worst than a trashcan full of dead babies? A baby eating the dead babies.

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Q: Why did the white mother with a newborn baby lock her car doors? A: Because a black guy walked by.

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what are the best kind of bees none they sting and hurt like hell

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One night, a man dreams that he is a bird that can fly into outer space. The next day the man finds out that his son is a homosexual.

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there's a new drink out called the Bin Laden... it consists of two shots and a splash of water

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Voldemort's nose is so flat, that it looks like he doesn't have a nose.

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What did hitler say to the jacket potato? Your fucked now!

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Q.What is black and white and red (read) all over? A. A penguin in a blender.

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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There is a tree. its still there. your still reading this, i dont know why, ok im getting sick of writing something that isnt even funny

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Two fuses wearing bombs for hats were sitting on a bench with their frayed feet dangling on the ground. A match was walking along and tripped, hitting it's head on the ground and bursting into flame. Luckily the fuses had finished lunch by that time and gone back to work. Unluckily for the match it died from burns to 80 percent of it's body.

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Q: What is the proper name for a female dog? A: Well there could be several names it could be a name on the collar in which case please look for the number so it can be returned to its owner. Another possibility is that it is a stray which you should either run for it could have a disease and you should just forget about the name then or take it in as your own and name it.

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If you spell "ChuckNorris" in scrabble, you get 22 points.

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Burrinbar Smells like incest anal sex!

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Two jews walk into a bar. They drank beer and shot some pool and had a good time.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Grass is green Skies are blue

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What is green and red and flies 100 miles an hour? Super Frog.

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Can a rabbit jump higher than a tree? Trees can't jump

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whats orange and cant talk? an orange

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Why wouldn't joey pay attention in class? Because he was being raped by a grizzly bear.

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Why did the little boy let go of his balloon? Because I was raping his face.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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