Why did the woman come out of the kitchen? She didn't.

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A gay man goes out with a butch lesbian and develops a loving relationship, years later they get married and have kids, adopting them from the local orphanage and lives happily ever after.

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how do you make a baby stop crying? but hot coals down its throat

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What did the girl say before she jumped a bridge? "Do you think I can jump off this bridge?"

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What's the difference between my dog and my wife? I respect my dog.

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What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

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What's 9+10? 19

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What did the Blonde do when she saw train tracks? She walked over slowly, looked both ways, and crossed safely

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whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

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How do you put a baby to sleep? Snap its neck.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Jim: Why did the chicken cross the road? Bill: Why? Jim: To get to the other side! Bill: I don't get it Jim: It's an anti-joke, because you expect a punchline but there is no punchline, you get it? Bill: Hold on, let me tickle myself.......oh okay now I get it hahahahaha!

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What is the difference between a pile of baby's and a new jeep? I don't have a brand new jeep in my garage.

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why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

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If i could re-arrange the alphabet i'd put my sausage in your oven

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What is green and slow Grass.

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What's worse than a dead baby? What a sick question. Most would argue that nothing is worse than the death of an infant.

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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What is the difference between a baleen whale and a black guy? One speaks and one says EEEEEEERRRROOOOOWWOWOWOWOOWRR!

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Why was 6 afraid of 7 7 eight 9

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everyone dislike the first joke on page one

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops