Q: Why did the Asian fail his driving test? A: Lack of concentration on the road and low knowledge of functioning a car.

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Why did grandma drop the dish? She had a heart attack and died, falling to the ground and thus bringing the plate with her to the floor.

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why did the man fall down? because he was shot.

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dont you hate it when your reading something and it doesnt end the way you cactus

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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Knock knock Who's there? Doctor Doctor who? Doctor Adams. You called me about your father's stroke.

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When u send someone fudge, u must send a note along with it! Roses are red Violets are blue Fudge is brown Here's some fudge

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Well it all started when 7 did something horrible to 8 and 9. Always being used for various things and never getting credit, 7 finally snapped one day at the office. He went home for lunch, which was uncharacteristic for him. He came back with a large duffle bag and a trench coat on. He walked into the the middle of the office and opened the bag and trench coat. The events that followed are now known as the office slaughtering of 1992. 7 ended up gutting 8 alive and eating its intestines. 9 was forced to watch then inch by inch was cut up. His heart was ripped out and shown to him before he died. The body was then thrown into acid, and 7 hung himself with piano wire, but lived. 7 also has herpes and 6 doesnt want anything to do with that shit.

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(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

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A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

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what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Mary had a little lamb, The nurse and midwife fainted. Because last year she met a ram, And they got too acquainted.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Irune. Irune who? Irune my life with all this red sand.

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Why did the girl break her leg? Because I pushed down the staircase.

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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How can you tell if your roomate is gay? If he gets an erection when you have anal sex with him.

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Why did the Asian student do well in school? Because he worked hard and studied everyday

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What did the blind man say to the mentally challenged man when he bumped into him? Watch where you're going, retard.

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What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

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Scratch and Sniff [________] smells like glass doesn't it?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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