A priest, a minister, and a rabbi all walk into a bar. They all say ouch and then continue walking. Although the minister did hit it at a higher speed and ended up with a black eye.

4501 3346 1687 2292 david0209. never do this.

What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

Scenario: Two guys are out hunting. Two guys are walking and a one falls down. The other calls 911 and the guy still standing asks what to do. The person at the hospital told him to make sure his friend was dead, then heard a gunshot. The guy who called said "Now what do I do?"

Why did two girls need one cup? they didnt feel like washing an extra dish to drink their coca cola

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

a black guy, mexican guy, and asian guy race to hop over a window. Who was the LAST one to hop it? the mexican because he had to clean it first.

A man is traveling to the nearest grocery store. He stops at an intersection and notices a another car beside him. It was a black corvet. So he blew it up and the men inside of it as well. He then proceeded to call the cops as to try to cover the explosion up as if it was not his fault. Unfortunately, the police had video evidence of the incident through video surveillance and the man was arrested for life. He never got a second chance in life and eventually died a slow, painful death in the hands of cancer at the age of 91.

A princess kisses a frog to acquire a prince. Then gets arrested for beastiality.

What has 389,236,587 arms, has rainbow colored fur, and fornicates on your front lawn? Absolutely nothing. That's pretty much physically impossible.

Q:Whats yellow and on the floor in the bathroom? A: A Rubber Ducky

how long does it take chuck norris to watch a 24 hour video 24 hours

Why does Ray Charles always smile? Because he doesn't know he's black.

Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? Because her mother inadvertently left the gate open while gardening.

Q: if it takes a week to walk a fortnight how many pounds of oranges can you fit in a grapegruit. A: None, because there is no bones in ice cream

Why did the German burn the Jew? Because he dropped his tea.

Why did the boy kill his parents? Because he doesn't understand this joke either

Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

What did the strawberry say to the elephant? Nothing. Because it's a strawberry and strawberries can't talk.

You grand mothers so old she going to die soon.

What do you call a one eyed hippo? A do-you-think-he-potamus

Why couldn't the 13 year old get into the pirate movie? He has cancer and is dying in the hospitable.

If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

Roses are red Violets are blue, Eat my anus with a spoon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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