How do you get a bunch of Jews in a car? You tell this family who happens to be of Jewish faith that they are going to be late for the birth of another family member's child. How do you get them out? Tell the mother had a miscarriage. This will make them promptly want to leave the care and grieve with the other family members for the lost child.

A horse walks into a bar. The barman asks "Why the long face?" The horse takes offense and replies "I was born like this."

A dancer walks into a barre

Why was the blind man bored? - He was in a coma

A little boy was walking down the street when a strange looking van stopped next to him and the man driving asked the little boy where he lived, where his mother was, and if he wanted a puppy because he had some in the back seat.... The boy proceeded to enter the van. The man then handed the child a puppy and promptly drove the boy home.

If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

Hey, you know what would be funny? A joke.

Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

Why did Billy kill Joey? Joey had sex with Billy's wife... and Billy wanted revenge.

Q: What's worse than having a terrorist throw a fridge at you? A: World War 5

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says 'Why the long face?' The horse says 'My alcoholism is destroying my family.'

Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

Robin, get in the Batmobile.

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

What's the difference between a chicken? One leg is both the same

Roses are red, and many other colors too.

A man walks into a bar and asks for a drink. The barman says no.

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

What do you call five black me pushing a car? "Very nice young men who helped me when I broke down," according to my grandmother.

Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

Why did the Grizzly bear refrain from attacking the hiker? It didn't. The hiker was torn to shreds within minutes.

Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

Where is Jew University? Berlin, Germany

how do you save a car from falling out of an airplane? I don't know.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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