A bartender sees Jesus Christ, George Washington, and Adolf Hitler walk into his bar. The bartender is drunk.

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whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

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Why are babies like shake weights? Cause If you shake them long enough, they both end up being inanimate objects.

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A priest, a rabbi and a mullah walk into a bar. The bartender looks at the three, laughs and says "Please leave now, God is dead"

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why was there a fish in a fish tank ? because if it wasnt it would die

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A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

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Q: How many elephants can fit inside a Volkswagen Beetle? A: Four.

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well use a tissue!

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What's the difference between a pair of slippers and a pair of dead babies? Essentially nothing.

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Why didn't the Mexican dwarf eat his taco? Well, he actually started, but he had already had one earlier. So, he gave half to his friend who gladly accepted the free taco.

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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no rasist joks

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side XD

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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awkward moment when someone pretends to be Mr. Bear and stuffs up his own joke

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Roses are red Violets are blue Columbine was funny

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Q: Why did Tom bought a new sweeper? A : because his grandma fired their maid

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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Your mom is so stupid, she didn't know the answer to 2+5

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Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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Q: Do you know how to save a black man from drowning? A: No. GOOD!

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops