What do you call thousands of people running through london? The marathon

2 boy once went to a party. One boy dared the other to suck all the helium out of a balloon. Today this boy is know as Justin Bieber

How do you put a giraffe in a refrigerator? You open the door, put the giraffe in and close the door. How do you put an elephant in a refrigerator?. . . . . . No! You open the door, TAKE THE GIRAFFE OUT, and put the elephant in. So, the lion calls a meating in the animal kingdom and who's not there? The elephant, he's in the refrigerator. You have to cross a river infested with crocodiles, and you don't have a boat. How do you get across?. . . . . . No! You get in the river and swim across because the crocodiles are at the meating with the lion!

Why couldn't the Jew get pregnant? Because he was man.

What do you call cheese that is not yours? It depends on the type of cheese.

why did the black guy talk to the monkey? they were in the same cage.

Santa and a smart blonde jump of a cliff. Who gets to the ground first? Neither, they don't exist.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

A man walks into a bar. He I then taken to the hospital for a major head injury.

Q: What was the last thing to enter the bug's mind as it flew into the windshield? A: His back legs.

So a Mexican a Jew and a Philippino walk across the street What Happened? the border patrol shot them

Knock knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Banana Yoshimoto. A popular Japanese author of the book, Kitchen. She is incredibly talented and it would be a great honor to have her in your house, so you should open your door.

roses are read violets are blue my fanny is orange I have the flu my name is gemma

Guess what? Chickenbuttt hahahah! lolomfg

Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

Hi, my name is Mark and I have dead babies in my garage... Just kidding. My name ia not Mark.

Obama One Big Ass Mistake America

What's black and white and red all over? A Nazi banner.

Q: Wanna hear a dirty joke? A: A kid fell in the mud.

What do you say if you see a black man with blood on his hands and he has a mask on? Thank you doctor for saving my sons life!

why did the cow cross the road because he wanted to go to the mooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooove

What's worse then a worm in your apple? When your apples a human

Q: Why did the little boy fall off the swing? A: Because he was hit by a bus, and then was raped violently. He is currently undergoing psychotherapy.

Why did the Iraqi cross the road? Because he was hired by the CIA as an undercover operative to lead them to a highly dangerous target in the small town of Aziziyah and was leaving the area to avoid the impending Pavelow strike on the town center.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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