Why didn't the policeman stop the bank robbery? He wasn't there

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Bill: Hey Bob guess what? Bob:What? Bill: your adopted

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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A man walks into the bar and orders a drink. This is what you do in a bar.

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What's the difference between a black guy and a bench? A black guy is a living, breathing human being, and a bench is an inanimate object

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Your mother smells so bad that if she were alive in 1919 she would most likely be outlawed in the Geneva Convention or at least banished from conventional warfare among nations that adhere to the restrictions imposed by such a document

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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i'm here at a school my friend is eats a pool fuck yeh

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George Washington, a priest, a nazi and a jew are on a plane that's going to crash. There is only one parachute. George Washington says "For my country" and jumps off without a parachute. The priest says "For God" and jumps off without a parachute. The nazi says "For Hitler" and pushes the jew off and takes the parachute.

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Brandon Bass's career average for assists is 0.7 a game. guess what his nickname is bassy

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How many Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One.

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Q: what did the dog say to the cat? A: nothing dogs can't talk

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Your mother is so fat, when she stepped on a scale, it read quite a large number. She resolved to live healthier and exercise more.

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Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

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Q: What did the banana say as it was being eaten? A: Nothing. Bananas are inanimate objects and therefore are incapable of talking.

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Why did Timmy drop his ice cream cone? Because a skyscraper landed on him. Yes. A skyscraper.

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Why did the blind man have a poo Because he needed one.

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a pan of muffins comes out of the oven one muffin says "hey im really burnt" another muffin says "oh my gosh! a talking muffin!"

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7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,7,8

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who is gay wit mon james cornish

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What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

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What do you call a black person who flies a plane? A pilot!

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What did the mexican firefighter name his kids? Jose and Pablo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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