Why are the deserts so dry? Obama

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Whats brown and sticky? Brown paint,

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How did the girl cross the road? -She didn't, she died because she was blind and didn't see the "don't walk" sign.

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Why'd the guy fall off the building? I pushed him

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Have you heard the one about the blonde and the bear? No. Me neither.

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Scientists have discovered that the state of your hunger can affect what you say. For example, whether you choose to say ‘I’m hungry,’ or, ‘I’m not hungry,’ is based upon how hungry you are.

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What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

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Why did Justin Bieber jump out of the airplane? He didn't, i pushed him

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Why the guy without two hands at the beach was so excited? Because he couldn't scratch his asshole.

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knock knock who's there? Ah Maj. Ah Maj who? (say it outloud)

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Why can't Bin laden drive because he's dead

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Q: What would happen if Chuck Norris was hit by an Astroid A: He would die.

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"Did you fall from heaven?...Cause your face is really messed up."

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If the camel has seven toes and the armadillo has thirteen, why does your mom pleasure herself to a picture of George Clooney ?

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What does "Fiat" stand for? "Fabbrica Italiana Automobili Torino."

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Ok good, just checking. It would be a shame for your perishable foodstuffs to go bad.

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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If a tree falls on a deaf person, does anyone care?

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Really sorry Red, I did not mean to leave you hanging, and I hope you wont leave me hanging either, I just need my meds or thinks can get ugly, my health, I can tell you and even show you what my condition is, and heck show you my meds, but there are certain things even I wont spread on horsehead network, you know, people are so bitchy here on the internet, and if people knew what I got, yeaaah, I may start getting green thumbs, and I HAAAAAAATE those. Seriously, on a scale of zero (my ass) to ten, how insane do you see me as?

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Q: What's the biggest lie ever? A: Saying you read the Terms of Service

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What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

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You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It was commiting suicide.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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