why did the baby cross the road? he was stapled to the chicken

How are grapes and squirrels similar? They're both purple. Except for the squirrel.

If bananas are purple, then what color are oranges? I am not going to tell you the answer because this joke has no significance whatsoever.

What happens when a man farts a fancy memorial party in a ball room in England... At least 1000 people die somewhere on earth in the time his butt squeezed out that fart. And I'm sure someone gets raped.

You in love with me? Like platonic? Fine, we will move operations elsewhere, you really got to tell me who you are working for someday.

God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

You mom is to dumb when she herd about Walgreens she thout all the walls were green

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where is my tractor?

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

Q:what do you call someone who spends 7 hours a day playing video games? A: Someone who takes pride and joy from gaming

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

What does the blond say when she walks out of the salon Nothing, she is hit by a car, and promptly goes into a coma and hasnt said anything since

A. Why did the boy cross the road? B. Why? A. I don't know! That's why I'm asking you.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

This girl came up to me and said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. Her name was Jill.

Q. Why did Jimmy fall off his bike? A. Because he had alzheimer's and couldn't remember how to ride a bike.

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

XD That one was awesome Nero, for a moment I was really wondering if you refer towards a tough guy as yourself as a boy. Now you pretty lucky I like tough guys, and you always have a savage joke at hand don't you?

What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

What do you call a dog with two tails? ...Depends on what you named it.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling Why did the cow cross the road? Cause he had madcow disease Why did Chuck Norris cross the road? Cause he's Chuck Norris Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank Why did the horse go to the other side of the field? He liked green grass

How did the black man survive the Train crash? He didnt, he died liked everyone else

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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