What is big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

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Whats worse than going to jail for the rest of your life? Going to jail naked for the rest of your life.

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

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Why did the catholic preist take all the little boys out in the woods? They were going on a camping trip.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

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What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

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what is the difference between my girlfriend and my black pet bunny .... i raped my black pet bunny

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What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

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Why did Samuel drive his car into a tree? Because the tree was being a total jerk, blocking the road.

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Why doesn't Austin have sex? Because when his wife gets hot he puts dirt on her and hits her with a shovel

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread.

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Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

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Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

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Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

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You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

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Hey! Do you like fishsticks? Me too :)

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How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

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what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

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Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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