A. Knock Knock B. ... A. Knock Knock B. ... A. DING DONG B. Who's there? A. Me, I tried knocking first but you musn't have heard me, so I rang the doorbell.

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A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

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A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

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You dropped something.... Yo lip

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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Q: Why did the mugger kill the bus driver? A: Because he had a gun.

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Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

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what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

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Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

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a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

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A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

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Your mum so ugly that she isn't married

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A light bulb is very similar in shape to a pear. So, when you change a light bulb, don't replace it by a pear.

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A life-sized cardboard cut out of Justin Bieber was in a contest with a cut out of Liam Neeson. It was stiff competition.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall?? A: It depends on how hard you throw them!!

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A man walks into a bar. He hits his head, and then goes to the nearest drinking establishment.

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Want to hear a popular joke? Women's Rights

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

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So two people have conversation Luke: Hi Logan: Hi Snake eyes: ALHSKjagjdaoggj;jdjg;aj;kaj'dgajd Luke: You are so smart! (you retarted piece of poo) Logan: GAAAAAAAAAABBBBBBEEEEEEN

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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What do you say to a disabled man in a lift? Have a nice day.

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Why is Ray Charles always smiling? He's not, corpses rarely smile

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How do you make a baby stop crying for the rest of its life? Shoot it in the face.

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What's the difference between a prostitute and your mom? Your mom is a well educated lawyer who earns half a million dollar a year while the prostitute sells her own body for an extremely small amount of money.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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