What's brown and rhymes with snoop ? Dr Dre.

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

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What happened to the Asian who ran into the wall with a boner? He ejaculated his sperm, impregnating the wall. The wall went to the authorities, and the man was charged with rape. He is now serving a 10 year prison sentence, with no possibility of parole.

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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Wanna know a Chuck Norris fact? He is 72 years old and likely to die soon

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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What is Blue, Pink, and Green, and sometimes sparkles when wet? Grass. I lied about the Blue and Pink to throw you off...because I can.

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Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

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What happens when u mix water and soda? You get watery soda

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What do you get from M&M bags? M&Ms.

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My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

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How many Anne Franks does it take to screw in a light bulb? None, cause she's dead.

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What did the furry tweet when he went to a furry convention? A: I'm at a furry convention

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How do you acquire a bomb? Go to the bomb store.

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Yo momma is so fat that she is in the guinness records

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why did the girl have pink hair? because she died it purple, but it didn't work.

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Do you know whats funny to say to someone unless they're black. Your ma's in jail.

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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