Q: Why does the man smell so bad? A: He doesn't shower

What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

1. Look at the size of his putter. 2. Oh, dang, my shaft's all bent. 3. You really wacked the hell out of that sucker. 4. After 18 holes I can barely walk. 5. My hands are so sweaty I can't get a good grip. 6. Lift your head and spread your legs. 7. You have a nice stroke, but your follow through leaves a lot to be desired. 8. Just turn your back and drop it. 9. Hold up. I've got to wash my balls. 10. Damn, I missed the hole again.

What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

How did the black guy get knocked out? He was hit by a fridge.

Why did the boy get hit by a bus? HE didn't. He watched where he was going.

Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

Fuzzy wuzzy was a bear, fuzzy wuzzy had no hair. Fuzzy had no hair because he had cancer and died 3 weeks later.

why did the chicken cross the road? it wanted to why did the bubble gum cross the road? it was on the chickens foot

what has fore legs and cant fly a cat you idiot

What did the lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers.

Why am I constipated? I ate fiber glass insulation.

Why did the princess kiss the frog? She really wanted a wart.

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

A man walks into a bar. He has a nice drink and leaves.

Why did the Mexican cross the road? He was on his way to America Why did the black man cross the road? He was just running to his car you racist.....after he had robbed the bank

Why did the chicken cross the road? His family was being held hostage on the other side.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is hard to know things like that.

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

What makes George Michael gay? The fact he engages in sexual intercourse with other men.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the cock was on the other side.

What is black and blue, with nothing to do? The prostitute in my basement.

What did Johnny get for Christmas? Drugs, Johnny was a convicted drug dealer, age 19.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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