Why can't a cat fly Because it doesn't have wings.

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What do you call a dog with no arms and no legs? Nothing, it cant come

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A ginger, a brunette and a blonde all go to the store. They are checking out and the ginger says to the blonde, "Why did you get that cereal instead of the one on sale?" And the blonde says "Because I have a membership card that gave me a discount on this cereal." The ginger gets out of line to return her cereal because she remembers she too has a membership card. And then the brunette pulls out a gun and shoots them all because she has depression and needs psychiatric help.

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Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

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Q: What should you do when life gives you lemons? A: Life would never really give you lemons...

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why did the fat woman die? ... because she tried to commit suicide and the ceiling collapsed on her.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane act

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your life

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Q:What did the midget say to the toll booth operator? A: Is your family dead too?

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a lollipop? 782

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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anti-joke.ru - russian style

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a Corvette? I DON'T have a Corvette in my garage.

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A child walks into a bar. I swear those jungle gyms are too short.

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What did one tampon say to the other? Nothing. They were both stuck up bitches

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When The bus came by Jimmy went bye-bye

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Q. Why did the blonde die drinking milk? A. she was shot in the head by a 22.

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What did the pilot say to the female flight attendant? He told her to never tell his wife about the time they spent in mexico or he'd bludgeon her to death with a hammer.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says had a bad day the man says yes... he orders 10 shots goes home and shoots his neighbors

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civil rights

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Q. What's cold and has no feelings? A. A pole

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

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wanna hear a cat joke? just kitten

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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