Why did the mexican go back to mexico? He grew up there

Why didnt the boy finish the race? Becuase he stepped on a land mine.

How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

What do Justin Bieber and corn have in common? They are both fruits. Except for the corn.

How do you get a camel out of a desert? a helicopter

why did my BFF hate me?i called her an idiot on all the holidays including her birthday

Your mom is so fat shes having trouble getting into her own pants.

roses are grey violets are grey im a dog

A man crawled up to a water fountain but fell because he had no legs

What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

Q: how do you get a clown off a swing? A: You hit it with a axe

Why was chuck norris the anti christ? Christianity was being threatened....

what do you call the breaching of the anal cavity with a penis? butt sex

What's awesome that's awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Ketchup What else is awesome that squirts out of a bottle? Mustard

How old am I? If you guessed correctly, you are psychic. If you guessed incorrectly, I will send flying gnomes to capture and torture you. Unless, of course, you are of a racial minority in which case nothing will happen to you because I am not racist. :P

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

Knock knock. Who's there? Bob, your neighbor. Okay, come in.

What's worse than a worm in your apple That one time I rapped and killed your mom, oh and happy birthday prick

Roses are red, Violets are violet.

Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

What do call something that looks exactly like a turtle but is not a turtle? A picture of a turtle

What is worse than finding dead parents? Not finding them.

When life gives you Pure Filtered Water, Sweeteners (High Fructose Corn Syrup, Sugar), Lemon Juice from Concentrate, Less Than 0.5% of Each: Natural Flavors, Citric Acid (Provides Tartness), Modified Cornstarch, Glycerol Ester of Wood Rosin, Sodium Hexametaphosphate and Sodium Benzoate and Potassium Sorbate and Edta (to Protect Taste), Red 40 Make Lemonade.

A teacher, a lawyer, and a doctor are all at the edge of the cliff. Then they jump off and die.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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