A gay man watches football.

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonders new house? No neither has he.

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What do you call an Asian who can't drive? Underage, and therefore has not required his license to do so.

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I never made a mistake. I thought i did once but i was mistaken

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What's worst than the finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worst than the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple. What's worst than finding two worms in your apple? Finding seven dead babies in a trash can. What's worst than that? Finding one dead baby in seven trash cans.

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A man walks into a library and asks to borrow a book on suicide The librarian gives him permission and he leaves the library with the book in hand.

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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Why did they bury the fireman at the side of the hill? Because he was dead

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What's better than winning a gold medal at the paralympics? Winning two gold medals.

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Why doesnt Squidward wear pants? Because he likes to hang loose

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What's the difference between jumping off of a 2 story building and a 20 story building? You're more likely to die from the latter.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know.

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Why can't Julius Caesar use a cell phone? Because he is dead.

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how do you make a plumber cry? pull up his pants....

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Q: So I don't get it. Do women actually like not having penises and testicles? Do they genuinely enjoy it? A: Silly boy. Women ADORE not having penises and testicles. You just can't get your mind around someone having different preferences in anatomy than you.

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how many flys in a box six --sticksack

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she didn't have any arms

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What do you get when you mix a polar bear and a dog? A dead dog.

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What did the tramp get for Christmas? Nothing because he's Jewish.

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You know what's funny with rape? Nothing. It's horror.

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How many Mexicans does it take to screw a lightbulb? None, they couldn't cross the border.

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Whats The diference between a park bench and a black man? A park bench can support a family of five hahahhaahahah

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what is funnier than a apple? a talking apple

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops