Q. What's big, green, has four legs, fuzzy, and if fell out of a tree would kill you? A. A pool table

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Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

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What's white and black? Color blind.

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We started this thing together, I do not get it, he is like you said, just a little nerd...

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What did the Mexican, the European, and the Canadian all have in common? They weren't used in this joke the last time someone posted it on anti-joke.com.

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why did the chicken cross the road............ why dont you tell me smartass

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Atheism

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Roses are blurred Violets too I have astigmatism I cant see shit

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What walks on the three legs? Martin, he was born with a tragic birth defect and struggles to make a living.

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A jew walked into a bar Hitler said.... A jew walked out of a concentration camp

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Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

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Just because you do not see the joke, it does`t mean its not here... Ps: It helps us get hookers and beers while wasting your "valuable time" OMG PLEASE BE FUCKING UNDERSTANDING OHMYLAWD!!!!!!!!! Ps: Cry harder you greedy sons of shedogs

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What's funnier than New York City? ADAM STOCK! By Logan in South Dakota

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Wanna hear a joke about my penis? Oh wait I shouldn't tell you, it's too long

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whats worse than finding 10 dead baby's in 1 garbage can... finding 1 dead baby's in 10 garbage can

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Yo mama so fat! She should be concerned because diabetes is a serious problem that can lead to a heart attack. Also STOP EATING MCDONALDS.

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What did the Asian man say when he got a math problem wrong? Damn it

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Once there was a giant Pringle. His family was dead, his wife committed suicide. So one day he was walking to work, when he met a genie! The genie granted him three wishes. The Pringle's first wish was to have lots of money. His second wish was to have his wife back. Before he could complete his wishing, he awoke in a hospital where he was hooked up to life support and was in severe pain. His wife wasn't really dead, but he was out drinking and accidentally walked across a motorway and got hit by a huge lorry.

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Why can't Hellen Keller drive? She was too tired and was afraid that if she got behind the wheel it might cause her to fall asleep at the wheel which would result in an accident.

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What did one muffin say to the other muffin? Oh my gosh a talking muffin.

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Your mother's breasts sag so low that the late great impressionist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

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I like to rape children, then kill them, eat them and defecate them into a toilet

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Why did the little boy drop his ice-cream? He was run over by a bus and died instantly.

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What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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