HAVING OTHER LESBIAN'S OVARIES C AUGHT A AROUND U MBRELLAS SITTING TREES

What do you call a man with no arms or legs in the ocean? Bob

Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

NEVER

3 men in a boat One day there were a American, Mexican, and a Chinese men in a boat. The Chinese man threw over a fortune cookie and said we have to many of these in our country. The Mexican threw over a taco and said we have to many of these in our country. The American threw over the Mexican and said we have to many of these in our country. The End

I'm schizophrenic and so am I. I also happen suffer from multiple personality disorder. Schizophrenia refers to separation of mental functions, manifesting in anti-social behavior and delusions, and is unrelated to the separate disorder of dissociative identity disorder, popularly known as multiple personality disorder, characterized by at least two distinct and enduring identities and dissociated personality states. Both are crippling to normal behavior and function due to lack of public awareness and funding. Now get out of our ghost train or we'll cut you.

How do prevent a nun from walking through a revolving door? Put a spear through her head.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, there are many theories as to why the aforementioned chicken crossed the aforementioned road. The most plausible is that the chicken was wandering around, when it came upon a road. Being a chicken, it did not know the dangers of crossing it, and proceeded to.

Why did the cop pull over the car full of black people? Because, they were going 65 in a 35 mile per hour speed limit zone, Which is against the law.

Why couldn't the little boy tie his shoes? He had no arms

Yo mama is so fat that her doctor advised her to get some exercise or risk developing a heart condition!

You know what's real bullshit? That stuff that comes out of a bull's ass.

Yo momma so fat she couldn't even fit in a house

A man walks into a butchers and asks for a loaf of bread the butcher replies " no im a butcher" The man says " its ok my bikes outside"

Two members of the KKK walk into the bar into a bar. The bartender asks, "what do you think of Obama?" One of the KKK members says "he is my President, I respect him."

Q: what sport has a bunch of white guys sitting on a bench? A:the NBA

A black man bites into a watermelon. Just kidding he was white.

roses are red. violetss are black. a knife would go good in your back

Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

what do you call a black man sleeping on a park bench at 2 in the morning? Homeless

A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

why was allison crying? because her mom's dead.

Doctor, doctor, I just swallowed a roll of film! That was an incredibly foolish and dangerous thing for you to do. I would be surprised if you survived another day before the chemicals corrode your stomach lining and release hydrofluoric acid throughout your body causing sepsis.

Ask me if I'm an orange. Are you an orange? Nope! I'm a person! - SMC Digital

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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