Hey, is that your corvette? No, I thought it was yours.

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So Bob walked into his house after a long day at work and layed a rope on his bed. A few hours later his wife came home and found a beautiful tire swing in their backyard but her husband shot him self in his throat.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, my dick is hard, and it's cumming for you.

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How do you confuse your algebra teacher? Tell her to prove that she exists.

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A blond, a brunette, and a redhead all entered their designated classrooms to begin AP testing. They all worked extraordinarily hard to earn a passing grade and receive college credit. The brunette and the redhead received passing, yet average, grades. The blond also received a score that reflected the amount of effort she put into studying and memorizing the material, because there is no correlation between hair color and intelligence.

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Why did the black man get fired? In this economy businesses are downsizing and outsourcing jobs for cheaper labor.

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Why did the girl fall off of the swing? Because she didn't have any arms.

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what looks, smells, and sounds like red paint? blue paint, I lied about it being red

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My mom told me and my brother to lean up on a commercial...we were watching netflix

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A Jew is a person who adheres to the Jewish faith and claims a cultural or ancestral connection to the Jewish people, and a pizza is an oven-baked, flat, disc shaped bread usually topped with tomato sauce and mozzarella and then a selection of meats, depending on taste and culture.

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What's the hardest part of a vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

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Q: What is the first thing you do if you wake up and meet the entire justice league(!!!) Which tells you that you are the "chosen one" and that only you can save the world once your true powers awaken? A: Increase your schizo medication.

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why can't Amy ride on the rollercoaster? Because she's under the height limit.

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Word Problem Q.John has 32 candy bars. He eats twenty eight of them. What does he have now? A. Diabetes. John has Diabetes.

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What time is it? It depends in your location and time zone

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How do you make a nerd cry? Give him a 99% on a test.

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yo momma so fat dora couldn't even explore her!!!

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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"i once had a rabbit named socks.he was a funny little fellow until one day he got over excited and...well..." "did he...i mean..you know..did he...?" "what?lose a claw,throw up, sit in a pan of warm water until he calmed down?" "yeah! :)" "yes...but then he died."

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What do you call a black man with a gun a soldier who is fighting for his country

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your moma is sao fat that she is gay . nope im sorry thats just mean.

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Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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Why can't you borrow money from a leprechaun? Because leprechauns don't exist.

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Why did the chicken cross the road To walk back

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops