What has eyes but can not see, and rolls everywhere it goes? A man who fought for your freedom and lost both his eyesight and legs in doing so. Have some respect.

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What did micheal Jackson get for Christmas?a restraining order!

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Q. What do you get if you cross a suspicious person with a paranoid person? A. Who wants to know

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An Ethiopian fell into an alligator infested river. He ate 7 of them before he got out.

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What happened when Tim's house caught on fire? The fire department was contacted and they put the fire out.

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I gotta friend named Michael Nugyen and he dishonored his family. Did I mention he was asian ( he live in tampa fl )

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U are with a jew a Christian and a muslim, you walk in chicken shop, thw lights close, and all of a sudden, hitler and a vampire pop up. Which one do you kill? The jew.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What is worse than finding an apple in you worm? Biting into an apple and finding 2 worms

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Why couldn't the towel talk? Because it didn't have a language.

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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Q:Why did the kid drop his ice cream A:He was hit by a car

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How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

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I have a really good knock knock joke. You start. Knock knock. Open the door see who it is and then slam the door in your face THE END

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What did the black man say after he swallowed the bicycle? He didn't say anything. Swallowing a bicycle is physically impossible.

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

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At the Asthma hotline. Caller: Aahhh aahhh *gasp* *gasp* I need you... Woman: *slams phone* DAMN I WISH THESE PERVERTS WOULD STOP CALLING!

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

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What did the boy say to the elders at the senior center? Dayum, you're all ugly!

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How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

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your mom is so ugly that she is still a virgin, you don't exist you are just a figment of my imagination.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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