A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Two Jews walked into a bar. Then bought it.

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What did the jerk say to the Mexican? You are a Mexican

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Whats brown and can't ride a bike? A lampshade.

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Banana you glad I didn't say 'Orange?'"

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What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

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How did Nissan show its new car in there commircals By driving very fast and hitting fat kids $

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Roses are red, Violets are violet

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Did you hear about the homosexual that walked out of a hospital? He just found out he was HIV positive. (ic3)

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Why didn't the man get into Harvard? Because he had bad grades

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What do you call cheese that's not yours? Mine.

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Why was Reed sad? His mother has a penis

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wut did the cow say to the other cow thet's get a moo shake

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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I once was told that life is like a box of chocolates, but then realized that it wasn't

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Do they have a fourth of July in England? Yes, but it is just a sad reminder to them that all the cool people left for America.

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What did Jesus say when he was nailed to the cross? Please, not the nails.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Two dogs went out for a walk. Then their master took them home.

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Q: What did the dog say to the cat? A: animals don't talk

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Why don't dinosaurs talk? Because they're dead.

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What did the fat man say to the Spaniard? Nothing. The Spaniard was skinny and so the fat man was jealous and shot him in the face.

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A Hispanic, a Caucasian, and an African American walk into a bar. The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of a joke?"

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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