How do you blindfold an asian? step 1: Fold your blindfold into a triangle step 2: Wrap blindfold around the head of the asian step 3: Tie the blindfold on the back of the asians head step 5: You forgot 4 step 6: Your finished step 4: Tighten the blindfold Now you know how to blindfold an asian ˜´??

A man walks into a bar. He buys something.

Three children had stumbled upon a magic slide. There was a sign on the slide stating that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "JELLY" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of jelly when he reached the bottom of the slide. The next child, so excited to go down the slide began sliding down. She shouted out "LOLLIES" and sure enough she landed in a large pool of sweets and chocolates at the bottom of the slide. Finally, the youngest girl in the group mounted the slide. As she was going down she was enjoying the slide so much that she shouted "POOS POOS" forgetting the rule of the magic slide and finally landing in a large pool of excrement.

Jim: Kevin, how old are you? Kevin cries because they are twins. His Brother was hit in the head with a bat yesterday and does not remember anything.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a brick at him.

What is the definition of child abuse? Ms Bazan

bite me

How do you put an elephant in a fridge? Open it up and stick him in. How do you put a giraffe in a fridge? Take out the elephant and put in the giraffe.

An elephant walks in a bar. The bartender and everyone rushed out as soon as they saw the elephant

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

In order to find a woman, you need time and money. Woman=Time&Money The longer you spend at work, the more money you get. Time=Money Money is the root of most problems in the world today. Money=Problems Therefore Women=Problems

What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

What do you say to the man break dancing?? You don't, call an ambulance he is having an epileptic fit.

Why was the doctor unable to perform his surgery properly? Because he forgot his scalpel

My friends and family all recommended me for alcoholics anonymous, but all i had to say is that my father didn't raise me to be quitter.

How do you starve a black man?.........take away his food!!

Hey! Do you like fishsticks? Me too :)

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple Finding 2 worms in your apple

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

You mama's so fat, that the doctor suggested that she go on a diet.

What do a baby and a slinky have in common? They both bring a smile to your face when you push then down a flight of stairs.

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at Mcdonalds? Because I don't have a job, are you hiring?

why were the niggas in paris? rhetorical question. everyone knows they aren't french

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...