Your mums a potato

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Q: Why Marc can't run? A: Marc is a leaf.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im really bad at poetry Your mums a whore

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What's long hard and full of seamen? A boat, or possibly a submarine.

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what do you tell a woman with two black eyes? nothing, you already told her twice.

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Q: What did the black kid get for Chirstmas? A: Your bike

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Attack her with a sanding machine.

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RECTUM? Damn near spelled "Wrecked Him" the wrong way!

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am a bitch, and so are you!

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what is the worst thing a priest could do to a little boy? brutally murder him

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Chuck norris doesn't make his own butter he roundhouse kicks the cow and the butter comes straight out.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a tire? It depends on the size of the tire.

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What is the biggest lie in the world How the **** should I know

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

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whos best at KS3 irish and is sexy? tiarnan i lied about the sexy part

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there were two cyclists cycling down a main road in china at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace, one being chinese and the other irish. why did the irish man get stopped and the chinese man not? because the irish man had in fact raped and murdered a young child in his native home town and then fled the country to china.

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Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

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Jew logic fail: Jew: We have endured suffering for thousands of years! Guy: And how old are you again? Jew: eight. Moral: If you see a goddamn moral in this one then post it yourself :P

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A man goes to the doctor's office. The doctor says, "I have some bad news, and some worse news. The bad news is you have alzheimer's. The worse news is you have cancer." The man breaks down in tears, realizing that his life as he knew it is over, and recognizing the horrible burden he is about to become on his family, both financially and emotionally.

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i have a black man in my family tree. i am 25% african american among several other ethnicities.

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How did the chewy cross the road ? it was stuck to the chickens foot.

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? "shit"

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What's brown and sticky??? A brown stick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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