Want to hear a joke? Obama

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why did the girl like dick? Because Dick was a nice boy.

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once i was a dog and u were a flower........... i raised my leg and gave u a shower :)

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Have you seen stevie wonders new house No Neither has he

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm Helen Keller Everything's black

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Where was Susy after the bombing? Everywhere.

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How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? That's right.

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What's the difference between a leopard and a jaguar ? The rabbit flies faster, while the pigeon can breathe underwater.

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Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, I'm a schizophrenic, and so am I.

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Q: What did Bobby get for his first birthday ? A: Adoption papers

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A man in an airport asked me if i wanted my bag to be carry-on. So i said yes.

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q. why did the guy forget what he did at the paty last night? a. because he had short term memory loss

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How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

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i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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A sheep croses the road It gets hit by a car.

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Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

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A priest enters a bar moments after a young teen walks into the same bar. The priest scolds the teen, warning him of the possibility of arrest, alcoholism, and other bad life consquences. The teen apologizes to the bartender, and much later in life, he thanks the priest.

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How do you get clean dishes? You wash them.

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Why was there no girl on the swing set? She decided to get off of the swings.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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Roses are red, Violets are violet

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Why was the man burnt? Cause he fell in a fire

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Why was the girl crying? Because I raped her

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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