Why did the girl make a sandwich for her boyfriend? Because she offered to make lunch in order to save money by not going to a restaurant.

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roses are blue violets are red crap i screwed up dont judge me

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A Polish immigrant goes to the Department of Motor Vehicles to apply for a driver’s license. He has to take an eye test. They show him a card with the letters C Z W I X N O S T A C Z. “Can you read this?” the optician asks. “Read it?” the Polish guy replies, “No, sir. Allow me to put on my glasses."

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What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

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Yo momma so fat shes eating right now

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Windows are likes prostitutes. You can have two in the front and two in the back!

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whats the difference between kroush and a bucket of shit? the bucket

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there are three types of people in this world, those who can't count, and those who can. STFU, you corny loser

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Q: What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? A: A genetic aberration that is an insult to both God and man.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My grandmother has degenerative brain disease, We may need to euthanise her.

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How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

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What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

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Her hair was fine, her scent was great, now show me your fucking ****.......please

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How do you starve a black man? Take away his current food stocks, and means of income.

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(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

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Why did the Mexican sneak across the US border? There aren't many good jobs for him in Mexico, and with the cost of living in his small village, he will be able to provide for his entire family of seven on just minimum wage in California. He will miss his family terribly while he is away from them, but he believes it is worth it in the end. Once he saves enough, he will pay the coyotes to smuggle the rest of his family over so they can be together again. Hopefully none of them will die on the journey.

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Stop driving smart cars you fags

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whats worse then getting a parking ticket? the plague

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. It got hit by a school bus and died.

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LOVING BIRD DIEING BIRD DO NOT FLY AWAY

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Knock knock. "Whose there?" "Dave" Oh alright Dave, two seconds I have got to unlock the door~looks for and finds keys and unlocks door~ Hello Dave, sorry mate not been out yet so not been out, come in.........

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Where do you8 find a dog with no legs? right where you left it

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Q: Who was the most famous French skeleton? A: Napoleon bone-apart.

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what do call a girl with a waterslide nose? Ava Sherman

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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