What happens when you ask a blind guy to drive you somewhere? What happens if you ask a blind guy to drive? You will end up in a four way accident with 8 people dead 2 of which children and 1 baby. You might survive but the blind guy won't so you will have to go to court for him on the issue. You realize that you are terrible when it comes to the law and you get yourself thrown in jail for 2 years. When you get out you are so tired of getting butt raped that you go out and do it to someone else. Then you go back to jail an the process repeats it's self because this is the American justice system. We could work on it a little bit. But yeah, don't ask a blind guy to drive, your butt says thanks.

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-Knock Knock -Who's there? -It's just Linda from nextdoor. -Oh hi Linda come on in.

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What's red and looks like a bucket? A red bucket. What's blue and looks like a bucket? A red bucket in disguise.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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Q: How many Babies does it take to paint a garage? A: babies do not have good motor skills therefore, they can not hold a paint brush.

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Chuck Norris never shows emotion!!!... because he is a pragmatic person and thinks in a more logical manner.

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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Why was the emo kid sad? Because he gets raped by his dad every night

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Wow you look beautiful in that picture..... Let me see your tits. Sorry, I thought I was still texting.

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A Jew finally tipped He was in a canoe

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how many large people can you fit in a bath tub ... 1/16

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Why didn't the TV turn on? Nobody switched it on.

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What's the hardest thing to do while masturbating? Having sex.

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Why did the girl cry? i took her happy meal.

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Why do ducks fly south for the winter? because its to far to waddle

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What was John Lennon's last hit? The pavement.

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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What did the captain say to the priest? We're on a boat.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. -Knock Knock. -Who's there? -Not Sally.

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What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

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roses are red, violets are blue, hes for me not for you, if by chance you take me place, ill take my fist, and smarsh your face.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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What do you call it, when a jew makes fun of a black guy? Racism.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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