Why did the dinosaur rent a DVD in Redbox about a sex? Because he didn't own a Blu-Ray player.

When is a door not a door? When it is thrown away. Then, it will likely decompose in a landfill or be recycled into another product. In either case, it will no longer be a door.

If John has 10 packs of beer and he drinks 8 packs,what is John left with? Morbid Obesity.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? Stolen cheese

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

How many retards does it take to screw in a lightbulb? No number of them could figure it out. They sit in the dark for hours, scared of the monsters.

Whats green and smells like a red apple? A green apple

How many electricians does it take to fix a light bulb? One

what did the panda say to the poachers? please stop killing my family.

Why didnt Timmy Go to school? He Died.

Rawan what are you looking at, stop reading this

What do you call a kid without any friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

Q: Why do blondes wear hoop earrings? A: Those that wear them think that said earrings positively accentuate their physical appearance.

How many babys does it take to paint a wall red? 7 and 24 paint brushes cause babys need do overs

Why was the woman so hot? she was on fire

this isn't meant to be a joke, but just letting all of you know, inside jokes don't count and kony jokes aren't funny

Why did timmy's face turn red? Early that morning Timmy was brutally attacked by the local street gang which proceeded to smack timmy's face with a baseball bat and smearing the blood with a dirty rag.

Why wasn't the elephant allowed to the pajama party? Because he didnt have any pajamas.

wat do u say to a guy with a 3.5 cm choad wats hot tater tot

Three men were on a plane. Oh wait. You probably already heard this one.

Your mom is so ugly she often finds it difficult attracting members of the other sex.

What did the alcoholic tell his son? Don't do meth.

A: Where does a cow go on the weekends? B: To the mooooovies? A: No, to the slaughterhouse.

why was the tricycle lonely? the mom back over the kid in the driveway.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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