Did you hear about the man who discovered the secret to making women happy? Neither have I.

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As far as I know, the day after tomorrow is going to be YOUR lucky day, because you will be tasting sausage for the first time with your lower lips... No seriously, you cant be virgin, you can tell me the truth, you like 24 or something?

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Why doesn't Caillou have hair? Because he has cancer.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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star wars kid

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How do you get down from a horse?? You don't... You get down from a duck.

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what ddo you call someone that has a small dick benjamin

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Q:How do you get better at boxing? A:Get a bigger package Daniel W. Schnurr

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What is the difference between my dog and my girlfriend? I love my dog

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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Why did Jimmy fall of a building without a paracute? Because he lost a bet.

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How do you get a Jew to jump off a cliff? You kidnap his family and threaten to kill them if he doesn’t.

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Q:Why are all of the vampires extinct? A:AIDS is a serious disease. You shouldn't joke about it.

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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Why did the boy drop his ice cream? He did not have sufficient stability in his arm at that moment causing him to loosen his grip and drop his ice cream.

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What's small, black and at the top of a burning building? Oh shit - I forgot my baby

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A black man goes outside to shoot some hoops. He misses all of them because not all blacks are good at basketball.

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noah is a scrub jungle

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede!

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I will see it when I believe it, as far as your order or whatever goes, I have already taken a look, and its nothing for me, you hide behind idealism yet use cruel methods and inhuman tactics in order to justify your means, you hide behind a shell of fucking "charm" and employ people to harass others. YOU ARE NO FUCKING BETTER THAN THE REST! YOU ARE BENEATH ME! As for that sister fucking bullshit, joke is on you, I do not have a sister! I bet that was one of your fucking "Nero`s" all six billion of your fucking personality disorders. Moral: I am the FUCKING MORAL MAN! And while I do not have a sister to rape, ill get down with yours.

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when god created an asian he said 'Crispy"

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A Muslim gets off his plane from Saudi Arabia to New York and walks to customs where a TSA agent asks him "what is you business in America?" The Muslim responds "I am here for a vacation". He walks on, and returns home 10 days later.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? The police, your father just died in a boat accident.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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