a penguin biked to a bakery he walked in and asked for buns the baker said how many 12 or 13 the penguin said it don't matter I brought my bike

So a priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. They order some wine and have an enjoyable evening.

A man walks into a bar and sees a man with a big orange head. The man asks the bartender, "Why does that guy have a big orange head?" The bartender replies," If you buy him a beer, maybe he'll tell you." So the man buys a beer and gives it to the man with the big orange head and asks why he has a big orange head. The man says, "One day I found a genie and my first wish was to be the richest man in the world, my second wish was to be married to the most beautiful woman in the world, and for my third wish, I told the genie,'Ya know, why don't you give me a big orange head."

What's disabled and red all over. The kid I hit with my car.

A. Knock Knock B. ... A. Knock Knock B. ... A. DING DONG B. Who's there? A. Me, I tried knocking first but you musn't have heard me, so I rang the doorbell.

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

Why couldn't the T-Rex clap his hands? Because he's dead.

What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

A black guy, a white guy, and a Canadian walk into a bar what do they all have in common. They are all involved in my Joke.

Jack be nimble. Jack be quick. But Jack still couldn't out run that bullet.

what do you call a mexican with a rubber blanket cold

a man walks into the doctors office and says DOCTOR!, DOCTOR! IT HURTS TO BEND MY LEG!!! the doctor replies then dont bend your leg and the mans great pain eventually heals

You dropped something.... Yo lip

A guy walks into a bar- he walks out of the bar because the beer was expensive and he didn't feel like getting drunk.

What do you call an African man with no legs? Murderer

Roses are red Violets are blue I look down My pants are brown.

What do you call a horse with two legs? A kangaroo

Q: what do you call a mushy green circle that tastes good? A: An avocado

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's orange and sticky? An orange. What's red and sticky? My stool - is that normal?

I came up with one when my friend Sam told me the fortune from her Jone's Soda. A change of heart may lead to a new living environment, a change of heart may also lead to death.

What do you call cheese that isn't yours Stolen propety....

Your mom is so fat that she has trouble walking up the stairs because she gets easily winded.

Q: Why does a hamburger doesn't taste like an ice cream? A: Because.

There was a bunch of kids on a bus. One boy yelled "Look a squirrel!" Nobody saw it because he's dyslexic

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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