Why do black guys always have sex on their mind? Because they are men.

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Whats worse than the holocaust? Sex with helen keller.

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Today we eat large amounts of pizza. The one piece had a lot of mushrooms. Like more than the other pieces. The cheese was flawless except for the burnt edges.

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You know what's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Because you touch yourself.

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm going to murder you Did you look behind you?

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter what you call him he isn't coming anyway!!!!

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Why bouriquet fall off the swing? Ask him.

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"You just went and made a new dinosaur?" "And due to its well-developed core muscles the staff behind Jurassic World has called it - 'ABDOMINUS PEX'." "That's a stupid name."

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Spilling Dr. Pepper on your carpet

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a gay guy is in a club, from across the room he sees another attractive man with now shirt and he gets an erection.

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There are two parrots sitting on a perch. One parrot says to the other parrot, "Do you smell fish?"

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Wanna know a Chuck Norris fact? He is 72 years old and likely to die soon

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Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

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Why was the dog barking? Because I lit him on fire.

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

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Mary had a little lamb. Then Died.

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Why did the little girl cry when she fell off the slide? Because when she fell she hit the dirt ground, cause dust to fly into the air, he eyes started to water in response to keep her eyes from being damaged. The slide however, was taken down, too many children had been hurt while playing on it. The community is now pooling money together in order to build a new playground.

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What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

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The baby started screaming in the dead of night. It woke up his mother, but his father did not be woken by it. why? Because the father left the mother some time ago, and emigrated to Australia with a new girlfriend, who is incidentially a model, and therefore he could not have heard hs child scream whilst on the other side of the world. His new girlfriend dosen't like him.

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Q: Billy has 47 pieces of cake, he eats 38. What does he have left? A: Diabetes

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Roses are red Violets are blue These two lines are overused I wonder to what poem they originally come from

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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