knock knock. Who is there? You have. You have who? Your entire family in my basement.

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Is it not a antijoke? When your granpa uncle or whatever used to pull out basically worthless coins out of your ears? And each time you wanted for him to drag out so many you can actually buy some bubblegum or something, the "stash" you where saving diminishes the moment you receive a new coin? Moral: Dont believe in yourself! Believe in me! Because I believe in you!

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You are so dumb that you receive poor grades in school.

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If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

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A fat man walks into a gym, and comes out fatter

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what's the difference between a pound of liver and vomit? £3.24

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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what do you call a girl that just took 15 loads to her face? sasha grey.

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What's the difference between a park bench and a black man? Nothing. They're both capable of supporting a family of three.

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i just cant stand up to cripple jokes

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what do you call a old guy who touches children? my dad

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A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

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Chuck Norris ordered a Big Mac at Burger King. After being told politely that Big Macs were served at McDonald's and not Burger King, he walked out and drove to the nearest McDonald's.

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What did the man say to the other man. Hi

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You're adopted.

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What do you call a middle-eastern man flying a plane? A pilot

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Knock Knock... Who's there? Nine... Nine who? Nine Eleven.

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I'm called the! no i wish am I left

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How does Batman's mother call him to dinner? She doesn't, she's dead.

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Knock knock Who's there? Eiiiiijajajaajaja EIIIIJAAAA

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why did Kanye interrupt Taylor Swift at the VMA's? because he had a little too much scotch before the ceremony

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How do you get a Mexican's attention? "Excuse me, may I have your attention?"

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'How do you make a plumber cry? Buy him a belt for Christmas.

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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