—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

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Did you hear about the guy who had his head chopped off? He's dead.

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What did the boy with no arms get for Christmas? Love and attention from his parents.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Joe Barkley. Joe Barkley who? ...

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What's worse than being raped? Finding out it was your uncle.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? it doesn't matter, it got turned into KFC before it crossed.

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whats black and hangs from my tree my neighbor

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What is the difference between 1 and 2? 2 is a higher number than 1.

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have you ever seen an elephant hiding behind a flower? No? well it must have been hiding pretty well.

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Why does Greg steal? Because he is a thief He is also scouse!

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Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

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Knock knock. Whos there. Your landlord. Your landlord who? Bitch, i'm here with your eviction notice you haven't paid rent in weeks

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What starts with a J, and burned in the oven? My Jumbalaya, i left it in for too long...

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Did you hear about the man who played the lottery? He lost.

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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Why is the old lady crying? I threw a fridge at her.

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yo mamma so fat that when she goes out in high heels she comes back in flip flops

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A frog and a toad eat a pie and then realize it is weird and then die.

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Think of a number, add it by 7, subtract it by 2, and multiply it by 4. Now close your eyes, isn't it dark?

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Who looks like Justin bieber, and is really cool? Justin Bieber, but I lied about him being cool.

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How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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What did the indian boy say to his friend? He didn't he was too busy studying

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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