Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting mauled by a pack of hungry wolves

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Who doesn't love finding money in your pocket when you go to put your pants on? a rape victim

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Your mother is so fat because she inherited poor genes and dietary habits from her own parents.

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B=boy G=girl B:hey i got a good nock nock joke but you have to start it G:okay nock nock B:whos there?

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A duck walks into a grocery store. He looks at the shopkeeper, who then grabs a broom and shoos him back outdoors.

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I wonder what mute people say to themselves. :/

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What's worse than celery stuck between your teeth? A cruise ship stuck between your teeth.

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I have a dirty joke. Yesterday I fell in the mud.

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what is the difference between hitler and the jews? They had different religions

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Q: What would have been the easiest way to stop the second world war without killing anyone? A: Paid Hitler for his art.

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NEVER

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What did the black guy get for Christmas? (In 1938) A bruise from the Klu Klux Klan.

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Bible Games aka Bible Buffet: SEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEGAAAAAAAAAAAAA! Sometime after the death and return of Superma... Jesus. God: RAISE FROM YOUR GRAVE! Jesus slays holy white beasts: POWER UP! POWER UP! HOMO UP! Uh did he say homo u... ARGH! CANNOT CONTAIN LEVEL OF HOMO! TURNING FURFAG/ALTERED BEAST. A wild Saten appears!: WELCOME TO YOUR DOOM! Jesus used gay wolf punch, it was not very effective... wild Saten uses OMFG HE TEARS OFF HIS OWN HEAD AND THROWS IT AT JESUS! Its super effective! Jesus Dies. Moral: Second coming? He came back to meet his disciples and crap AFTER quoting "ill be back", did he promise some third coming? Is that why people have been waiting for over 2000 years? :P

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So i was writing a letter to my girlfriend on valentines day right ? So this is how it goes . " hey lisa happy volentines day!" my black friend walks up to me and says" its a mightyfine day out! " The moral of the story is... Tomatoes can't fly planes

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What's the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? I don't have a ferrari in my garage.

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Q:Whats the difference between Glenn Close and a black widow? A:one is a person, the other is a species of spider.

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what did the blind, deaf, paraplegic child get for christmas? other than cancer, nothing.

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"Wise old man, what is the meaning of life?" "I don't know why do people think old people are so wise these days?"

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what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

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Q: How do you wake up Lady Gaga? A: You murder her friends and family.

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Roses are red Violets are blue We decapitated some little children Now I'm in jail too.

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What did the dying man say to his friends? Nothing. He had no friends.

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my ilkshake brings all the boys in the yard. and the local health inspector's like , have you got a permit to be selling dairy beverages from a home based business?

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A man walks into a bar, and then a second man walks into a bar. The third man ducked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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