What did the cop say to the speeding black man? "Can I see your license and registration?"

What's the best thing about twenty three year olds? there are twenty of them

One, two, three, four and five

Why were two black men fighting for a dollar that fell on the floor? Because they both lost their homes in the crashing market and have to care for their ill children that need money for medical expenses.

Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

Q:What happened after the snake tricked Adam and Eve into eating fruit from the tree of wisdom? A: Nothing, but the three of knowledge was a whole other story though. Moral Man.

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

Jimmy comes home from school one day and goes to his mother. "Mommy, guess what?" "What?" "I had sex with my teacher today!" Naturally after hearing such news the mother gets appalled and tells her husband. "Well, that's my boy" he says "Now that your a man Jimmy we're going to go out and get some drinks tonight be ready in a half an hour." So they arrive at the local bar "Wait here son, you can sit down and save us a table and I'll go get the drinks ok?" "No dad I think I'll stand" "..why? What's the matter son?" "My butt hurts"

Q: How to make a man who suffers from hypochondria want to kill himself? A: You take a shet on his face.

I road a horse to school. My friend stabbed it with a Javelin and screamed.... The horse was his Dad

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's better if you don't understand

Why couldn't the kid eat his vegetables? His parents stabbed him...

Whats faster than a mexican running down the street with your TV? An airplane

A blonde woman, a brunette woman and a redhaired woman walk into a bar. They can be considered fiscally responsible because it was two for one Ladie's Night.

Daughter: Mom can i watch a movie? Mom: Sure. Daughter: Thanks mom! You're the best mom in the world! Well....Mary is, since she had Jesus.....But anyway. Thanks!

Why didn't the black boy get any presents from Santa? Because he isn't real.

why did the blonde put on a coat? because she was cold.

Have you ever had Ethiopian food? No. Neither have they.

You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

Boy: Mother, I'm dying! Mother: Ha, lol, I put poison in your cheese! Boy: MOTHER! Boy: *dies*. Mother: Ha, lol!

What does a black person and ebola have in common? They both kill people

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

An Asian with a big dick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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