How did Billy tip the cow? He didn't, cows are animals and that would be wrong.

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In Soviet Russia you don't drive car, because the Soviet Union was disbanded in 1991

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Why did the blonde walk into the bar? To get a beer.

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I have three heads and nine eyes, what am I? I'm a liar.

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What's the difference between an elephant and a plum? Their color. What did Tarzan say when he saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the elephants over the hill. What did Jane say when she saw the elephants coming over the hill? Here come the plums over the hill. She was color blind.

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A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

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Dwarf Shortage

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What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? dead parents.

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Did you hear the one about the dead guy? Apparently he was no longer living.

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Whats worse that having cold soup? Cancer

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Q. What do you call a guy with no arms and no legs in front of a door? A. Matt

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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A young boy is crying in the park, when priest walks up to him -What's the matter son? -My parents died in a horrible car accident 2 weeks ago and now i'm held in an abusive household.

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How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

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Know what im sayin'? No but im wearing pants

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Why did the balck man sit at the back of the bus? Because all the other seats were taken.

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Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

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Your mom is so fat she is larger then the average person.

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Granny P-O-R-N!!!!

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whats sad about justin bieber getting hit by a car and dying ? I wasnt driving the car that hit him.

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Q. How many blondes does it take to put in a lightbulb? A. Cause of 7,8,9!

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OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

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Q: What did the skeleton order when he walked into a bar? A: A beer and a mop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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