why did the dead baby cross the road? it was stapled to the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why aren't there Olympics in Mexico? Idk Because everyone that can run jump or swim are already across the boarder.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's green, has four legs and falls from trees? A praying mantis that lost a battle and had it's frongt two legs removed causing it to lose balance and gripand plumet groundward from the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is black and blue and red all over? A woman that just learned a valuable lesson.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

moonshine most none americans think its just when the moon shines we have another story

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is worse than getting hit by a car? Getting hit by a truck

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Yo momma so fat that they've diagnosed her with type 2 diabetes and she has an extremely elevated risk of heart disease. You should really encourage her to try and eat better and get more exercise.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What do you do when a blonde takes the pin out of a grenade and throws it at you? Take cover as there is a person close to you wielding an active grenade.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

One day 2 people were gonna fight after school and the final bell wrung then they started the mtch and the challenger says, "Hey whats the one thing that you say when you don't want to fight and ypu let the other person win?" The other guy says, "I give up?" Then the challenger says, " I WIN!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the chicken cross the road? To buy more crystal meth to fuel his addiction while his wife and children starved in the public houses.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Not only did 7 have that intimidating look to him, but 6 had recently found out that he was a well known mob boss who also went by the name of Lucky Seven. he was in charge of a gang called The Prime Numbers. They had been terrorizing 6's city for sometime now, whether it was stealing, mugging, or even killing or vandalism. 6 sure had a lot to fear, but he knew things might turn out well, as 6 had a great ability to try his best and do what he believed in: Justice

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What's the difference between a cow and some dirt? They're the same except for almost everything

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Pilot: We need to lighten the load of this plane Italian: I'll throw out these pizzas, there are too many of them in my country Mexican: I will throw out these tacos, there are just too many of them in my country The american stares in horror at the two men, the pizza and tacos were their only food and they were lost in the Himalayas.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

What do you call a deer with one eye? Nothing. The deer was transported to a specialist animal hospital and now has two working eyes, eliminating the purpose of this joke. We apologise for wasting your time.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Q. Why dont people like rian mcreesh ? A. Because he smells bad and gives off a creepy vibe ...

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

why couldnt the african child eat enough food? he didnt have a mouth.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

A man and a woman walk into a bar... They both die from cerebral hemorrhages.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Little Johnny was walking through the park... only he had no legs. Little Johnny was raped later that day... while he bled out from him having his legs cut.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Don't chop the dinosaur daddy! OK.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops