what do you call a man that has a terminal illness and is named James - James

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A homeless guy was walking along the beach when all of a sudden he see's what looked like to be magic genie's lamp so he pick the lamp up whipes it off then sells it for black tar herion.

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The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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What happened after Will Ferrell took a dump? He wiped his ass and flushed.

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A middle aged woman walks into a bar. Its Friday and there is a breeze in the air. She leaves shortly thereafter.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Pansies are purple, Nothing rhymes with purple.

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why did stuart buy an ipad from the mall. because he wanted an ipad

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Whats long and hard? a baseball bat

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Why did the muffin not eat the other muffin. Because muffins do not have a digestive system.

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Why did dallin fall off the swing he got hit by jds big penis

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What is a pedophile's favorite thing about twenty-six year olds? There are 20 of them.

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A blonde walks into an electronic store...she buys an IPhone because someone stole her blackberry, her money, and everything she cares for. Nah, I'm just kiddin', she was murdered.

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One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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how do you confuse a blonde do nothing

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to your house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

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why did the plane crash? because the pilot was a tomato.

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Do you know what would happen if Hitler was still alive today. Nothing he's not.

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why did the man beat his wife? why not?

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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An overweight man is at a gym. he is trying to lose weight because he feels uncomfortable with his size.

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How many Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? Only one, but he may forget to finish the task due to his Alzheimer's.

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A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

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What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist bastard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops