Yo momma so old that she has started to look into an affordable life insurance plan to ensure all her final expenses are taken care of.

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What's black, white, and red all over?? A penguin that just got hit by a truck and is now struggling to live.

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Far from, yet all organizations are money based and put capitalism in front of all, so if lets say, one organization, needs help from another, a money transaction is made, I play a role there, as a well... Diplomat, its not my title, but my title is something I cannot reveal to anyone, not even my wife, id be putting myself and people in danger, but since I master things such as hypnosis, I can well, influence people, this is how I can pull of favors myself. Not favors such as "kill that guy for me", but more like... In your case. "If you are going to kill the wizard, please let the rest be, I know they are good people"

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Three guys walk into a bar. The four man hastily ducks, grabs his phone and calls the local paramedic.

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what do you do when life gives you lemons? take them, free shit is cool!

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this website is a bad joke

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What did the dinosaur say to the human? For one, dinosaur's don't talk. And two, humans were not roaming the Earth during this time.

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Why doesn't the chicken cross the road Because his dad got ran over by a car when he crossed the road

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An elephant walks into a bar. Several people are trampled.

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Why did the little girl drop her balloon? Because she was getting raped in the face.

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Girl: What's up? Guy: If I told you, would you sit on it?

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How do you put your babysitter in jail? Kill your kid on her shift.

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Haikus are lovely But sometimes do not make sense Refrigerator

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got a smoke dectecter, You died in a fire

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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What did the rich white student to the poor arabian teacher? good morning Mr.Stevenson.

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Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being ripped apart by an angry orangatang because orangatangs have the strength of ten men.

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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knock knock! who's there? Jim Jim who? Jim Goldenbach

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What was the black kid carrying when he was running down your street? His television set

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Blind jokes are not funny! I just don't see the humor in them

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whats brown and sticky? Doody

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops