Bill Clinton, George Bush, and Barak Obama all found a magical lamp. The Genie appeared and said, "I will grant one wish for all of you, and one wish only." Bill wished to become president. The other two thought that would be pretty cool and did the same. (ic3)

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like if your cool

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding out your Grandmother died.

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A man travels to the park, and kills a person, throws them in a bag and runs away. He then travels to the grocery store, kills 2 people, throws them in a bag and walks away. He then travels to the gas station, kills 3 people and walks away. He keeps traveling around killing people until he has claimed 69 victims in all. From this, we can infer that he was a psychotic murderer with a perverted sense of humor.

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So my friend told me to go shot myself I got my Canon and shoot myself The image came out very clean and profession.

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Why did little Jimmy fall off his bike? Because I threw a fridge at him.

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whats worse than 10 dead babies in a bucket 5 are alive and eating the others

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What did the black kid get for Christmas? Your bike.

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Where do cows go on the weekends? The slaughterhouse.

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Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

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What is black white and red all over? A zebra which a lion did not finish eating.

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A women driver prepares to park in a small space between to cars on the side of a road. She safely and flawlessy parallel parks, and proceeds to enter a nearby coffe shop for an important business meeting.

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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How did the person die? He got hit by a car.

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Why did Jimmy drop his ice cream? Because he was hit by a bus Knock Knock Who's there? Not Jimmy -thatcooltyguy

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What's worse than a bee sting? A large number of things ranging from getting stung by two bees to falling off a cliff.

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Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? She had no legs. Why did noone help her up? She was fat.

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What do you call a fridge painted red and brown? A fridge.

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What's better than a stick? A stone

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what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

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What was the black woman doing in the kitchen? She was simply washing her hands after eating dinner.

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How do you fit 100 dead babies in a box? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla Chips. hehehehehehe

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Roses are red Violets are blue I've got to say I hate you!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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