A horse walks into a butcher shop and asks for two apple pies. The butcher says "sorry, but we don't have apple pies. It's a butcher shop." And the horse says "nevermind, I came here on my bike."

What do you call a man sitting at the bar drinking alone? An alcoholic.

What did the milk bottle say to the other milk bottle? Nothing. Bottles can't talk you silly goose.

What did Anne Frank say to the German Officer? Nothing. She had to keep quiet in a cramp attic in order to survive.

Doctor doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains!" "Never-mind that, you've got AIDS.

If I said you had a beautiful body would you stop asking me if those jeans make you look fat?

Why did the boy fall off of the swing? Because he had no arms

Guy: I have a gun get in my van Girl: SHOTGUN!

A man walks into a bar. Splash.

A man walks into a bar. and buys a drink.

Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

whats the same about a donkey and a horse? They are from the same animal classification group.

Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was suicidal.

What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

WHAT? FRIENDS? DID YOU NOT READ MY QUICKFUCK PROFILE? Likes: Orgies. Favorite color: Pussy. Description:Looking for women with vaginas (maybe an asshole is fine too) Please, I am a womanizer, of course we are friends, heck I am even romantic, you know romantic as in... Uh... Well, maybe not my rose bud... (because that did really not appear at the solve media right now)

What did the black man do to the white woman? I Dont KNow ask him

Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

Duncan walks into a bar and is greeted by his friends Eric and Tom. Duncan tells them that his wife left and took the kids. Duncan then goes home and hangs himself.

What happens when an alien goes out in the rain It gets wet

My wife was diagnosed with cancer yesterday. Yeh I didnt find it very funny either.

whats worse than failing your maths test?

Where do you go when you find a fork in the road? To the nearest restaurant.

what did the first fire hi-grin say to the second fire hi-grin nothing they can talk it what just really awkward.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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