What did the boy with cancer, no arms, and no legs get for his birthday? Nothing he was dead.

What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

One a upon of time there was man named Cinderella. He was so mad because his name was Cinderella. The end.

Q: Why did the boy have blue balls? A: because the respectable girl with high self esteem refused to give him head.

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a loaf of bread!

A couple elopes in Vegas. The next morning while eating breakfast the woman tells her husband she thinks it was a mistake, using her alcoholism as an excuse for her inability to make practical decisions. The man proceeded to cry and called his attorney to arrangea proper divorce.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

This one time at Concentration camp.... My friends all died cause they were chosem in the Selection

Why didn't the octopus have any friends? Because they are antisocial creatures by nature. -Louis

THER ONCE WAS A jueny WITH A TEN FOOT WENNY AND HE WENT TO SHOW IT TO THE LADY NEXT DOOR SHE THOUGHT IT WAS A SNKE SO SHE HIT IT WITH A RAKE AND NOW ITS ONLY FIVE FOOT FOUR!

why did the chicken cross the road it didnt it got eaten

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

What do you call a man with no legs? A leg-less man.

If your mom is a teacher and your dad is a gynecologist, how many pancakes does it take to stack on top of a dog house roof? 12. Because footballs don't have feathers.

What does a boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

swag

What did the cop say to his belly? "Hey in there!"

How did the fat man die? He was fed porrage until he died. Who killed the fat man? Leonardo DaVici How did Leonardo Da Vinci die? Natural causes (Actually I have no idea how Leonardo Da Vici died but if I am wrong please correct me) Thank You for your coperation.

Are you ready kids "Aye Aye Captain" I Can't hear you "AYE AYE CAPTAIN" Ohh... Who lives in a pineapple under the sea "Spongebob squarepants" Absorbant and yellow and porous is he "Spongebob Squarepants" If nautical nonsense be something you wish "Spongebob Squarepants" Then drop on the deck and flop like a fish "Spongebob Squarepants" READY Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants Spongebob squarepants SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS!

What do you call a black man driving a plane? A pilot, you racist.

An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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