Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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Why can't the blonde dial 911? The battery on her phone is dead and she needs to recharge it. (Good thing there's no emergency.)

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What's the difference between 10 dead baby's and a Ferrari? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

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an islamic man with a strange bag walk into thr airport. he is probably heading toward his flight like any other person.

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Stacey has no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Stacey.

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Bill is walking down the street when a girl who had a crush on him 20 years ago sees him, goes up to him, and says, "I think I know you, what is your name?". Bill says, "Timmy," and keeps walking because he is an asshole.

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What does a weasel and a naked college girl have in common? No clothes

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rose's are red violets are blue I have touretts blblblblblblblblbbl

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Roses are red , Violets are blue You little dumb ass bitch Ain't fuckin' with yoouuuuuu

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A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who is driving? They take turns due to the fact it is a long trip.

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A man walks inta pet store looking for a dog. All he finds are cats.What did he end up buying. A weasel

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Who created Apple? Steve jobs.

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A working black man, Santa, and the Easter Bunny where walking down the street and find a penny, who picks it up? The working black man, Santa and the Easter Bunny take no payment for their work.

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Q: What's the difference between a trampoline and a baby? A: I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline.

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Why did Sally fall off the tree? Because Sally weighed 500 lbs and it was a bamboo tree.

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Do you like fish sticks? Yes. Me too.

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What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

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Roses are red and so is venus now kneel down and suck my penis:)

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What's the difference between a red shirt and a blue shirt? one is red and one is blue

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What do call the time things don't go the way you plan them? Reality. bitch

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Your mom is so fat, when she farts, I can use her underwear as a hot air balloon

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What's Hitler's favorite drink? Jews (meaning juice)

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How do get a cat to like you? Give it lots of love and attention

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A teenage girl walks into a bar. She sits down and watches the TV up against the wall. The bartender walks by and says "Hello, do you have I.D." The girl says "No, I'm just here waiting for my ride." The bartender then says "Well I'm sorry to have to tell you this but you gotta be 21 or over to sit in the bar." The girl says "Okay, but is there anywhere I can wait that is safe?" The bartender asks "Why?" and the girl replies "Well, I've been hiding from my ex boyfriend. I just broke up with him an hour ago. He was very controlling and he is still not over me. So now I'm here waiting for my new boyfriend." The bartender says "What you have a new boyfriend already? Maybe that's why your ex was angry." The girl says "yeah, I know, oh look there's my ride. It was nice talking with you, have a good night."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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