A man dies from a cat attack. he goes up to heaven. At the gates, St. Peter asks him, " how did you die sir?" The man doesn't reply so Peter says, "cat got your tongue?" "No," he says, "cat got my throat!"

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get slaughtered.

What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

What did Helen Keller say to the little boy with cancer? Hudd Wahher shelper, ghh o.

What does it mean when people say your mom? it means that there name is Hunter

Why do black guys have ashy elbows? Because of 9/11

what's the difference between northerners and southerners? southerners live to the south of birmingham, and they don,t stink of urine.

Pickup line: Hey babe, do you work at a grocery store? Because I wanna spill some milk on the floor so they can call spill on aisle 9 and I'll be there waiting for you and watch you clean my mess.

What did modern scientists say to Einstein? Neurtinos travel faster than the speed of light! :)

Why Americans are so bad at League of Legends? Because they can't defend their towers.

why does stuart own alot of hollister because he is autistic

Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

An obese man walked into McDonalds and ordered 6 Big Macs. He proceeded to walk to a booth in the back corner and eat them all. Turns out he was white.

Q: what did humoure say to lie A: u must be tellin a lie

A black man texts his wife to tell her that he is going to be late coming home from work.....Just kidding, pay phones cannot send text messages.

What did the pig do when the farmer died? He just stood there cause pigs are stupid.

Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? She was blind.

Did you know that Claire Seiter likes to drinkapplseiter? No. Oh well she does..

Why did spock look in the toilet he was concerned with his poop

What happened when the blackman saw the white man. they both said hello

Why can cats jump so high? Cats leg muscles are different then ours. They work kind of like springs that build up energy and then release suddenly. Its kind of like a budgie cord. This gives them the ability to jump so high. If humans were built the same way, they could easily jump up on a one-story roof.

A penguin is walking through the snow, and comes across a polar bear with a hat on. He stops and stares at the polar bear for a second and then compliments the polar bear on his hat. The polar bear smiles and promptly consumes the penguin, building up a fat layer for the coming Winter.

What's harder than killing a baby? My penis while doing it. by: Lucky7 LG

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...