What happened when the white man saw a black man running with a purse? He called the police. The police proceeded to chase the black man down tackling him into a dumpster, causing permanent spinal damage. Upon investigation into the situation, the black man was deaf and he was bringing the purse, which contained an epi-pen, to his dying wife a block away. The police officers involved were fired and sued by the family, ruining their lives. Months later they both committed suicide.

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What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

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KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

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A man wins 1 million dollars on the pokies. He goes home and tells his wife and kids about the big win. The next day the man goes go the casino and and loses the 1 million as he is addicted to gambling

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How do you find a jew amoung italians? Through a dollar and see which one whines its not enough!

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Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

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the only people that will miss whitney huston are her drug dealer and possibly bobby brown

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Hey have you seen Stevie wonders house? No? Don't worry he has'nt either.

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what did the father say to his son whom had only one arm? hey son.

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Why am i so sexy? Because a dog raised me.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Orange. Don't be ridiculous. Oranges can't talk.

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why didn't bob die? because he liked his hair just the way it was.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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funniest joke ever!!!!!.....chris.

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What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? A catfish could never pass the LSAT because it is unable to perform high-level critical thinking.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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A man falls out of a boat. What happens next? Well, you would think he'd know how to swim, but due to his alzheimer's he didn't, so he drowned.

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Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

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What do you call a man who rides on unicorns? A liar. Unicorns don't exist.

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what do you call a black guy under water? A Scuba Diver

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven has an extra penis

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Why was little Mat petting his dog? Just kidding his dog died in a house fire... so did little Mat

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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