You can pick your ur nose u can pick ur friends u just can't pick ur friends nose.

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What is funny about a man who chews tobacco? Nothing, the man was diagnosed with mouth cancer at a young age and got his jaw removed, he was very upset.

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How many amish does it take to change a lightbulb? Presumably only one, but since they do not generally use electricity it has yet to be tested.

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Whats Pink and fluffy? Yellow fluff thats been dyed pink :D

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Q; why did the German ask the Jew to go in his shower? A; because the Jew had stayed the night at the Germans house.

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Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

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how do you stop santa from laughing? snap his neck.

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Have u seen Ray Charles' piano "no" neither did he

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Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

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Jake likes to have tickle parties with McCauley Culkin.

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A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

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What's black and white and red all over? I don't know I asked you

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Q: Where does the queen of england live? A: This was the question I had to anwser to be able to post this joke.

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What did one blind person say to the other? Nothing. He is also mute.

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A dog walks into a bar, followed by his blind owner.

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the second koala fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first one. Why did the third koala fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Tall asians

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knock knock. who's there? Kony. Kony who? Kony says:" Uganda be abducted"

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

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Jimmy: Knock Knock Nick: Whose there? Jimmy: Joe Nick: Joe Who? Jimmy: Joe Mamma Nick: No shes dead.

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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A man sees another man standing at the edge of a tall bridge looking down. Man: Don't jump! No one wants you to die. You have your whole life to live and I'm sure you will find happiness somewhere. I was once in the same position as you, questioning if god really wanted me on this earth at all. But I decided to make something of myself and now I am a very successful business man. You can do the same if you just put your mind to it and put your troubles behind you. Other man: I was just admiring the view.

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What happens when you die? Your body gets decomposed by bacteria

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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