Roses are grey. Violets are a different shade of grey. Let's go chase cars. -Dog

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A clown walks into a bar and orders a pie. After about 2 minutes, the bartender gives him a pie. Later, a blonde walks into a bar and orders a cake. After about 1 minute, the bartender gives her a cake. Then a dog walks into a bar. It doesn't order anything because it's a dog.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A boy grows up loving tractors. For birthday and Christmas each year he got a tractor toy of some kind, until the age of 17, when he finally gave up tractors and got himself a CD player. One day, listening to all the latest tunes with some headphones, he looks outside to see his neighbour's house on fire. He goes outside to find firemen trying to put out the blaze. He jumps into the blazing house and inhales as much as he can, which astonishingly puts out the blaze. A fireman confusing asked "How did you do that?" The boy replies, " I'm an ex-tractor fan."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A deer looks at the ground and sees something strange. He wonders what it could be. A rabbit comes along and thinks the same. A badger promptly arrives after the rabbit and thinks the exact same. 4 seconds later they all get hit by a train.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

There is a Asian a black guy and a white guy the black guy loves apples the white guy loves pears and the Asian loves Macaroni the white guy gets a apple the black guy gets a pear and the Asian has no lunch so the black guy kills the white guy for the apple and the Asian kills the black guy because he is hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -9

- How do you save a black man from drowning? - I don't know - Good!

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What happened when the Asian girl got a B on her report card? She committed suicide

thumb_up thumb_down -9

If a red house is made out of red bricks, and a blue house is made out of blue bricks, what is a green house made out of? Green bricks.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do you call a fast black man with big muscles? A good source of minorities evolving.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

the person who wrote 1 under me is gay

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What do call a man with a daranged wife? Married

thumb_up thumb_down -9

An asian man walks into a bar and lights a cigarette. He is politely asked to leave due to smoking being prohibited indoors.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

why did andy wake up this morning. because he wasnt tired anymore

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did the apple say to the pear? ...Nothing they can't talk...

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Repeat after me: Silk, Silk, Silk, What's the square root of 465?

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A mosquito is a common insect in the family Culicidae. A blonde on the other hand is a Homo sapien, a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Roses are blurry so is everything else I need glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -9

2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Smoke Day, Every Weed.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

What do you call a black man with big cuts on his arms? You call an ambulance to help him!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

An American man and a Chinese man have a conversation. The American man asks the Chinese man after a couple of minutes of speaking, "How long have you lived in the United States?" The Chinese man replies, "I moved to the United States when I was ten years old."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

A Sodium atom walks into a bar. A Chlorine atom bumps into it, taking the electron, then making a bond. Suddenly, the police come in. They arrest the Chlorine atom, of course, but they also arrest the Sodium atom. He says, "what did I do?" The policemen say, "you're too ugly to be out in public."

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Why did blonde drown? As a child a child she never learned to swim since she did not enjoy swimming.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops