Why did Tommy fall off the swing? Because he had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Tommy.

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why did little johnny start choking? because somebody shoved a bag down his throat

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A plane crashes on the border of canada and america, where do you bury the survivors? I lied there are no survivors and the bodies were incinerated by burning jet fuel so theres nothing to bury.

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Okay.. So a dyslectic man walks into a bra...

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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How to make deep fried chicken. Step 1: Go to your local swimming pool. Step 2: Throw a dead chicken into the deep end. Step 3: Strike the chicken with lightning. Step 4: Remove your newly fried chicken. Enjoy!

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So, Ryan Dunn was driving under the influence of alcohol. The result of this action proved to be fatal for both Ryan and his passenger; who happened to be his close and personal friend.

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why does the man appear fat he is

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What do you get when you see a black man writing? A man devoted to getting a education.

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Two chinese friends are chatting, and one says ????????? His friend says ??????? After that, the first one says ???????????, and you keep reading this like if you understood chinese.

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What is wrong with being a black Jew? You have to sit in the back of the oven.

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Why didn't the 1 month old chicken cross the road? Because by that time it's already a Mcnugget.

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Why did the Black man buy some slaves? They were his family

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What's worse than dropping your loli-pop? The Holocaust

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I have a really funny joke.

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What's black and white and red all over? A greyish red object.

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A black man, a gay man, and an Asian woman are sitting at a bar. The black man gets a phone call, and after the call all three of them are excited because they are all friends and the black man just got into a good college.

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What did the soldier get for his birthday? Shot in the face.

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What did one cannibal say to the other cannibal? Nothing, because he was eating him.

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What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

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What do you call a griraffe and a duck who's favorite colors are both purple? A coincidence in which two unrelated species have the same preference in colorant hues.

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What kind of movies do pirates like? They don't know, Somalia doesn't have much of a film industry.

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What do Chinese kids have that African kids dont? Chinese citizenship and at least one Chinese parent.

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What happened when the boy stood up? He had all his limbs hacked off and soon after died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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