I don't have friends, so I'm anti-social.

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What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

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A man walks into a bar. Three hours later, ambulances arrived, because the man was knocked out. The man who saved was known as a hero, and was awarded a medal for his good deed.

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What's Arabs' cutlery? Bread

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I took my blind grandmother to the art gallary

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se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Bridget, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and since it is rather long, it brushes against her round breasts. Even though she is a little sweaty, you realize what a beautiful woman she is, and you decide not to kill here. You instead ask her to marry you, and after she replies "yes", with tears of joy streaming down her face, you two make passionate love in the front seat of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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Why is the interesting goat so talented at chess? He's Bobby Fischer's dad.

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I got 99 problems, and most of them involve my terminal illness.

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What's invisible? A lot of stuff.

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What's better than your first Hanukkah? Not being a Jew.

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roses are red, no one gives a shit, get back in the kitchen and bring me my chicken dips!

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How do you know when you're on the wrong side of the tracks? You don't. (Wyndellberg)

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man walks into a bar his lack of awareness means that he didnt notice the maintenance sign in front of him he falls in a 200foot deep hole and dies.

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wheres an unexpected place to find sand? a human pancreas.

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Call of Duty is a good game.

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i got 99 problems.... and aids is one

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Q: Why did the guy fall off his bike? A: He got shot!

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What's worse then ten dead babies in a barrel? The one at the bottom is still alive.

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A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

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Why was the woman angry with Santa Claus? Because he kicked her hands.

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What's a pirate's favorite video game? Pirates lived in a time before such technology existed

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Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

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I would tell you a joke about a broken pencil, but it's pointless.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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