Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

Why was the girl so stupid? She had mental retardation caused my Down Syndrome.

What did thirty starving Jews fight for on the train ride to Birkenau? A crumb. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

Where's my baby??

Q: If I have 5 pencils, and you have 3 spoons, how many pancakes will stick to the ceiling? A: Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

Would you like to go to my jinga party, if you do save the date 9/11?

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Noooooooo...

Have you ever tried grabbing a bottle of 7-up free and walked away with it? Moral: If it says its free, its free ffs!

Why did jimmy fall off the swing? He had no arms or legs Knock knock Who's there? Not jimmy

My mom farted, she also has Alzheimer's, I also have Alzheimer's. Also pizza didn't like it

When is it ok to drink urine? When you're Bear Grills

what do u call a blonde in the libary? alexandra wallace

What did the man with candy say to the little boy? I have Candy.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To rape a duck

What do u call Lindsay Lohan fall from grace? Probably likely tragic and is also a very useful metaphor for The USA's projected path for global and economic superiority.

Knock Knock. Who's there? Guitar. Guitar who? Violin.

Roses are red Violets are blue This poem sucks Because violets are purple

Whats worse then finding a worm in your apple? Watching your mum get sandwiched by two black guys...

Three children had stumbled into an old cottage where they were met by a wizard. The wizard pointed out a slide in the corner of his cottage. He told the children that they could each go down the slide and that they could shout out a word while sliding. He told them that what ever they shouted, they would land in a pool of it at the bottom of the slide. So the first child began sliding and shouted out "GOLD" and sure enough he landed in a large pool of solid gold. Due to its extreme hardness the child was killed immediately on impact.

what did the man write down? nothing,because at that time, his pen was out of ink, so he had to open his dest drawer to get another one

Hollywood today: If you Like Dragonball Evolution you are gonna love this. Peter Linkoff a 16 year old boy, is being chased by his half brother Jack Ganonbad as Peter Falls into a hole, which contains a cellphone... ...THE LINK TO PLANET ZELDA! There he discovers that he holds the Link between earth and Zelda, and just then planet Zelda is threatened by The Evil Master Sword! A Meteor so destructive, that it sheer force could destroy the entire universe! *Random scenes going by so fast that you cant make shit out of them begins* "PETER LINKOFF YOU ARE IN DANGER!" *BOOOOOOM*" "BUT WHAT IF HE IS NOT THE DELIVER OF THE BOOMERANG!" Iiiit is said... Thhaat heee that wields the lasergun known as the wooden sword...<

What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? They're both purple expect the rabbit

why did the chicken cross the road? well... to get to the other side.

I have a joke Who is better, Kobe or Lebron? Kobe. But I lied, that wasn't a joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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