A Jew walks into a bar and says drinks are on me.

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Going up to someone and saying, "my mom is dead and my dad tryd killing himself, can i have a ride home?"

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Why was the minority sad? Because the police beat him and then he was raped in jail.

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you know whats funny?! nine eleven!

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Why do showers have 11 holes? Because Jews only have 10 fingers

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how do u make a plummer cry? Kill his children.... :)

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What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because skeletons don't get invited to parties because they are the remains of something that is dead and that would be a very ood thing to have at a party.

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How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

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Why did the black man bleed to death? He was stabbed, but he bled to death because his doctor had just prescribed him some blood-thinners for his serious headaches.

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Why wasn't the cab driver sent to prison after bombing the school? It was a suicide bombing.

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roses are red, violets are blue with a face like yours, you belong in a zoo but don't worry, cos I'll be there too not in the cage but laughing at you!

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Why did the man cross the road? He was in a state of depression and chose to commit suicide.

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There is two guys named tard and retard on a boat in shallow water. they both fall off. Who gets back up onto the boat? - Obviously Tard because ur dealing with a retard here.

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why did the magician stop doing magic ? he got hit by a bus and died

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What did the boy say to his father? I don't know. With the seemingly infinite number of topics that two people could discuss and the fact that both the father and son are fictional, it would be unreasonable and border edge mentally unstable for me to assume that you would know what they may or may not be talking about.

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

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Heads or tails? Heads. Sorry, I'm fresh out.

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Why was the little girl crying Someone therew a dump truck at her

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if a tree falls in A Forest, would Robert Smith hear?

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A horse walked into a bar. The bartender said "why the long face?" The horse then panicked, and feeling threatened, it kicked the bartender with its hind legs and galloped out of the bar. A civilian took immediate control of the situation and dialed the number for animal control, who arrived shortly and tranquilized the deer and put it back in its natural habitat. Don't worry, that didn't actually happen

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What did the white man say to the black man at midnight? It's really dark out.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Nothing. I killed them both with a fire axe and proceeded to kill all the patients in the hospital.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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