An ant tries to climb and sit on a tube. It couldn't. Do you get it? … I don't either.

Why did the midget cross the road? He needed to buy a ladder

Did you hear the joke about the vacuum? It sucks.

Why was the school girl called a dork. Because a whale penis is called a dork, and she identically resembles a giant aquatic dick.

Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

What did Tarzan shout when he saw the elephants coming? "Here come the elephants!"

I'm a burrito... With a big shirt.

Q: What did the Jew get for Christmas? A: Nothing you dumbass, Jews don't celebrate Christmas.

An Asian walks into a bar with his girlfriend He proceeds to buy himself and her food Pays Then leaves

Chip and Dale walk into a bar. Chip is black now.

What do you call an alligator in a circus? Testicular Cancer.

whats worse than walking in to the doctors office and he says you got aids heaps of stuff can be worse but haha you got aids

Whats worse than getting broken into by a robber? Looking at Obama

Everyone believes in something. If you believe "you'll have another drink," you may be an alcoholic.

A young blind boy is being tucked into bed by his mother. The mom says "Now Billy, pray really hard tonight and tomorrow, your wish will come true!". Billy says, "Ok mommy." and goes to sleep. The next morning, Billy wakes up and screams "MOMMY! I'm still blind, my wish didn't come true!", the mom answered, "I know - April Fools!"

How many chickens did Moses bring to the ark? 2

A thief walks into a bank. He has an account there and withdraws 200 bucks.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was forced by the man with a gun.

A redhead and a blonde both go out to smoke a cigarette. They are both at risk of lung cancer.

I haven't been this tired since the last time I was tired

What happens if you accidentally say your best-male friend's name instead of your boyfriend's name during sex? Nothing, they're both named Adam.

HOREY SHIT!! OMFG!! I win? Yeah I think so.. Wait. Why am I talking to myself.. Aww not again.. My doctor warned me about this.. D:

What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A jew is a human being who will understand and laugh at a joke, while a pizza will just sit there because it is only a delicious thing that people eat.

Q: What do you call a fish with no eye? A: Fssshh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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