Q. What's The Best Thing About Having Sex With Twenty Three Year Old's? A. There are 20 of them...

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How many apes does it take to put in a light bulb 3

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I'm a fish out of water. Help me I'm suffocating.

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A Japanese Nuclear Scientist goes to the swimming pool, and buys a ticket. He went to the changing rooms and proceeded to have a lovely bit of exercise, which helped him burn off the calories from his carbohydrate based luncheon.

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A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar, because they have turned to alcoholism because there is no God. GO COMMUNISM, BOO AMERICA.

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A horse walks into a Bakery and asks "Do you have any wheat bread?", and the Baker replies "No, we only have white bread." So the horse says: "Thats okay, I rode my bike today."

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1-"What's the worst thing about a joke?" 2-"The stupid punchlines at the end" 1-"No-- when someone dies and can't live to tell it..." (laughter) 3-"What joke you guys laughing at." 2-"None of you're business" 3-"Damn I really wanted to know" 1-"Didn't we all."

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Why was the little boy sad? Both of his parents died in a tragic car accident.

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Phoebe: Joey, it's a birthday party. Joey: Yeah, but for a one year old. What's the point? The other day, she laughed for like an hour at a cup. Just a cup with a picture of Elmo on it dressed as a farmer. And he's standing next to this cow. And the cow says...."Elmoooo!" Joey: *starts to laugh* Yeah...that's a funny cup.

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What did the man say to the other man. Hi

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Why did the middle-aged lady have a heart attack? Years of heavy smoking, alcohol abuse and lack of exercise had taken its toll on her body, causing it to age prematurely. @JWest

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What do you do if your walking into a room full of Lions and Jaguars? You stop walking.

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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Why did the bear turn red? Because I fucking stabbed it!

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pobody's nerfect

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roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

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Why did the mailman deliver the wrong mail to people's houses? He's a bad mailman.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't.

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Ask me if I'm a tree "are you a tree?" No

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my Tractor?"

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The chickens have become self-aware!

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What do you call a black guy driving a bus? A bus driver

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had gotten out of its coop.

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Ask me if I'm well Are you well? No

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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