Want to hear a joke? Obama

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Knock Knock I have a f*cking doorbell you asshole

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Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food on the other side

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What was the blind man doing on the bridge? Getting struck by lightning.

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Violets are blue and/or violet Roses are red so's my blood, see?

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Whats the difference between Qantas and Malaysia Airlines? Qantas only looses money.

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knock knock who's there? me josh! come in.

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Who moved faster? The snail or the blind man? The blind man until he ran into the road and got hit by a bus.

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Mother: "George what happenend to your pet rock?" George:"I dont know." Mother:"Here! I found your pet rock. It was in the same place it was before!"

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a jewish person sees a nickel on a sidewalk and continues walking.

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Knock, Knock, Who's there? The IRS.

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What's the best time to go to the dentist? When your tooth breaks or you need braces.

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wnna here a joke, toby limbers playing basketball

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roses are red violets are blue me + you =the perfect 2

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We're both lawyers.

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs? I don't know, that's why I asked you.

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Weaner

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What's the difference between a hooker and an onion? You don't have to cook an onion to eat it.

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Bob: I have a funny knock knock joke, but you have to start it. Joe: Ok. Knock Knock. Bob: Who's there? Joe: Uhhhhhhh Bob: Exactly.

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Jimmy Saville

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Barbara and Martin died in their apartment. The neighbor walked in and found glass and water everywhere. How did they die? -Barbara and Martin were fish.

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I have a black friend that recently went to the doctor for a full checkup. I saw him today, and he we was dressed to the nines in a very expensive suit. "What's with the suit," I asked. "My doctor told me I'm impotent! So I thought, if I'm going to be impotent, then it'll be harder to attract a long term mate without the ability to give her children someday. So I've decided to showcase my impeccable taste in style to make up for it." He seemed really bummed out, so I gave him a hug and we went and had some ice cream.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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