Weaner

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What do you call a person with no arms or legs? I don't know, that's why I asked you.

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Here come the elephants over the hill!

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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Why did the clown's ballon animal pop? He was a victim in a drive by shooting.

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Friends, they're like food. If you eat them, they die.

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Variants: :) I will always assist you in whatever you want. :( I want to kill you all by myself! Sense? Non? Fuck? Mind? Fission Mailed? Impossible Mission.

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What do u call a white hourse with no ass Penelope

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Q: How do you get a blonde out of a tree? A: Throw a moneky at her

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What's black, white, and red all over? A: Me after domestic abuse.

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What do you call a black guy that flies a plane? a pilot.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd probably put all the labials, coronals and dorsals in separate places sorted into plosives, nasals and fricatives, with the vowels at the beginning sorted by their relative IPA chartings, to make it more logical and easily attainable to foreigners.

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There was a girl that got on the bus . The bus started moving as soon as sat . The bus driver looked up at the window and saw the girl coming closer . Every time she came closer , the more he looked , the girls nose kept on bleeding more and more . When the girl was right next to the bus driver , he started to shudder in fear looking forward , knowing that she is there . When he looks to his right , the girl looked at him , then looked at the window . And started to pick her nose .

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A man asks his wife to make him a sandwich, she proceeds to make a sandwich using rye bread, lettuce, two slices of tomatoes, a variety condiments, mustard and several slices of American cheese. The man eats the sandwich at a parade with his wife celebrating Woman's Rights.

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Why did the baby fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Go away still nothing to see

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What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

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Whats the difference between a black guy at the beach, and a black guy at the zoo? One is at the beach, and one is at the zoo.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill to get some exercise. They were getting terribly overweight.

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A kid finds a bag of heroine. He is a good Samaritan and asks the nearest junkie if it belonged to him.

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Yo momma is so fat that....actually she's quite fit and i'd love to take her out on a date.

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ajkswhfuilafhgkfdgbluft

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, i thought violets were violet. hmph.

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What's smelly and Dirty? Someone who hasn't shower in a reasonably long time.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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