Why did the boy get hit by a bus? Because he was standing in front of the bus.

A kid goes into the ocean on a boogyboard and then gets eaten by a shark because the shark thought he was a seal.

Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad with colours Nice T!ts

A white man walked into a bar, and an indian walked into a totem pole...

Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

What is Jetlag? When your computer is running too many applications/programs, thus causing the game Jetman on Facebook to lag.

A man walks into a bar. He goes up to the Bar Tender and says, "Hit me with all you got!" The bar tender then ducks down under the bar out of sight. He comes back up with a sledge hammer and viciously murders the man. Blood spews everywhere and many others are brutally murdered shortly afterwards. :)

what did your mom say to you? go fuck your self you stupid greedy shit. you start crying later in your bedroom, then your mom comes with a bag full of your fathers semen, and dildos. and forces you to drink the entire bag.

don't take life to seriously nobody gets out alive

Why do people who walk into bars never have names?

Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

I'm hungry.

Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

What's so funny about Mexicans? Nothing. They're all humans too.

sandwich. roller coaster. brain sprout. cholera, meander. time. rivet.porcupine. mayonaise. frying. x-ray forever.

Bob goes to the store and buys some food.

What is black and blue and red all over? My wife.

Why don’t stores sell mouse-flavored cat food? It’s a matter of marketing; tuna, chicken and liver flavors sound much more palatable to the humans buying the pet food.

roses are red violets are blue i have 5 fingers the middle ones for you.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 8, 9, 10

How do you kill a blonde? Kick her off a cliff.

Why did the chicken fall down? Because it wanted to have fun

A car walks into a bar.

…What did you put in the drink that made me fart, and kill my horse?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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