I walk up in the morning feeling like pdidy who's pdidy grab my glasses out the door I have no glasses girl going to hit the city how do I hit the city ugh this confersasion is over song hmmff

what happens when a mexican makes love to an octopus? It makes a freaking weird looking animal

How do you get a one-armed man out of a tree? you wave.

what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

Forget about them, do not compare yourself to those beneath you, you always wanted to help as many as possible, in a world where everyone fights for themselves only.

Yo momma is so ugly that she should probably consider suicide

What's the difference between a sewer pipe and a French fry? A lot

What do you do if an elephant comes through your window? Pay For a new window

Why did the blond have a wierd look on her face? Because she was ugly

How do catch Lady GaGa's attention? Have a Bad Romance

What's worse than sitting through a boring class? Sitting on a bus that a terrorist is about to blow up.

what do you call an anoying ginger? jimmy overby

SEX

Why couldn't the boy talk? He had his fathers hairy scrote was in his mouth

I will create more jobs for americans

A man walks into the doctor's office and says "Doc my leg really hurts when I poke it like this." The doctor replies, "Yes, that is a knife."

Im sitting in class trying to write a joke. I should be writing my speech But i'm better off trying to think of the funniest joke that could get on the front page with over 9000 likes :( Lol nah thats never going to happen :'(

what did the little boy say to the man? Nothing because earlier that day his mom reminded him not to talk to strangers

Q. Why did the lady scream when she saw her husband? A. Because he was dead.

why did the black man start crying? because his ancestors were treated horribly

Bill: My brother died on 9/11 Steve: Oh, I'm so sorry to hear that. Was he in one of the towers? Bill: Both. Steve: Both? Bill: Well, he was in the first tower when the first plane hit, so he ran over warn everybody in the second tower. While he was in the second tower, he died of AIDS. Steve: LOL! Bill: Quit your laughing, Steve, and make sweet, sweet love to me! Steve: It would be my pleasure! (While Bill and Steve made sweet, sweet love on a park bench, little did they know that a hundred miles away in a beautiful Los Angeles home, actor Jeff Goldblum was making himself a turkey sandwich with extra mayonnaise)

I am fine, hungry but otherwise fine, I sometimes wish that things that come easy to you, did the same for me or others, excuse me, going to grab a bite, I hope we can chat here for a bit, it is not a chatting site the least. Say? Are you still burning mad at me? If not ill gladly give you a call, but if this is a ploy you are scheming in order to gain my trust I might be killing myself.

How many Norwegians does it take to change a light bulb? Only one. But all the replacements are high-tolerance, long-life and non-dimmable.

What do you call two black people in the same sleeping bag? A newly married couple on their camping adventure honeymoon.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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