What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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What is black and white and red all over? Interracial sex partners with smallpox.

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Jesus on the cross promised he would return rite? So three days later he returns in ghost form and leaves. So why people still waiting for him? He returned and left already! (Lack of Moral?): The third coming: this summers blockbuster hit!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was a socially responsible chicken and his family was on the other side and every day walks his ass across the street to go to work to provide for his family, unlike your dead-beat ass.

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Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

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what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

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Why was the tree sad? Because a bird shat on it.

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why did the 42 inch plasma screen blow-up 6 hours before the england match ? because it knows .

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Why Johnny's parents threw out his broken bike? - ´Cause Johnny got ran over by a drunken driver yesterday, when he was cycling back home from school.

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So a Mexican a Jew and a Philippino walk across the street What Happened? the border patrol shot them

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* Why is this dog barking? * Because he's a dog, if he were a cat it would meow.

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who likes to gets to get fisted A) sock puppets

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When Harry met Sally, she slapped him twice without reason, walked away and kept on with her day.

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HELLO EVERYONE

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

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Why did the boy fall off the swing? -Because he didn't have any arms!

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Knock knock! I'm in the shower, i'll be there in 5 minutes

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Why couldn't the blonde have children? She had pelvic inflammatory disease.

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What is worse than ten babies in the street, eleven babies in the street.

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What do you call a man who never farts in public? A private tooter!

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Actually it was me Josh brown

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"Knock, Knock." "Who's There?" "Banana."

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What's worse than dieing? Not much.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops