Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What's the difference between celery and a truck?

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Are you from Africa because you sure look likes you've got Ebola

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Once opon a time there was a black America He name was Bob

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? Because he was content where he was.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was the boy dead? The boy was hit by a bus ran over by a train and stabbed to death by a murderer then put into a grinder for a meal for the murderer.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How many chickens does it take to screw in a light bulb none, because chickens do not have opposable thumbs,therefore prevents them from preforming such a remedial task.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

How did Helen Keller burn the side of her face? She didn't use enough sunscreen.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I was raped when i was little.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why was 7 afraid of 8? Because 8 knifed 10.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? The pizza doesn't scream when it goes into the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

I remember the last words my grandpa said before he kicked the bucket. I bet I can kick this bucket. He missed and had a heart attack.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What happens when Chuck Norris and Mr. T get into a car accident? They trade insurance information.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Did you hear the one about the avalanche that crashed into the bar? It was such a tragedy.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

What's blue and smells? A dead girl guide.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

why did the chicken cross the road? he was stapeled to a cow and the cow got hit by a bus so they died.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why was the boy sad? He had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Whats the difference between a rake and a sack of dead babys? i dont have a rake in my garage.

thumb_up thumb_down -23

How did the cat get outside? It fell out the window

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Why did the chicken cross the playground? Thats what she said

thumb_up thumb_down -23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops