Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

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If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

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What's worse than tornadoes in the USA? Earthquakes in Japan.

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like most people my age. im 27

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad A: you kill his family lolololololololololol

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Where did Tommy go after the bomb went off? Everywhere

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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Why did Shrek eat the onions? Anyone who has seen the Shrek films would know that Shrek never mentions anything about eating onions. In the first movie, Shrek and donkey have a conversation in which he compares himself to an onion, but the scene lasts maybe a minute and never again does Shrek mention onions in any way, shape, or form. For whatever reason, this one scene has turned onions into the strongest signature icon associated with Shrek.

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Three explorers are walking through the jungle when they are suddenly captured by a group of cannibals, the cannibals, going through years of culture and hereditary custom, kill the explorers, skin their bodies, chop them to pieces and cook their flesh, finally they eat it giving them a prosperous feast while the rest of the world is unaware of whatever happened in that jungle.

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What happened to the young baby after her mother died It grew up got a collage degree and had a great life growing up with her dad and visiting the cemetery every year

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A Jew buys something that is not on sale

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a black guy a mexican guy and a puerto rican guy are driving together in a car whos driving? Whoevers car it is.

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How did the guy fall off the roof? He was pushed

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how did harry styles get in one diretion god

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johnny goes to the shops asks the lady at the counter, can i go home The Lady says ..... Buy one get one free

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what's funnier than a dead baby nailed to a tree? Pretty much anything because infant mortality is in no way funny

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Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

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Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

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What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

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knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

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What is brown and smells like sh!t Actual sh!t

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Why couldn't the color blind orphan find his apple? Because he was also blind.

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Theres a blonde and a brunette at a party. The redhead is left out because she has no soul.

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Whats worse than a dumpster full of dead babies? A landfill full of dead babies.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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