- Anti Joke

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

why didn't the girl like that one guy? he hurt her, hurt her real bad.

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

How did the black guy swim across the Atlantic? He didn't. He was prepared to, but then went on Expedia and found a ticket with Continental Airlines that was in his budget. He did not like the amount of service he recieved, and decided in the future he will save up and fly with a different company, or in fact swim across.

A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to the until he **. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

How will the world end? That information is unknown

W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

Whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing.

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari. There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

what does dana do in her free time? make love with jarrett

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

why didn't the girl like that one guy? he hurt her, hurt her real bad.

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

Knock Knock.

A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to the until he **. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

How will the world end? That information is unknown

What is 9+10? 19

W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

Whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing.

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

A plane carrying an Englishman, an Irishman, and a Scotsman is destined to crash unless some weight is lost. First they drop the spare engine, but there is still too much weight. Then they drop the luggage, but still there is too much weight. All three men then jump out. The plane crashes anyway.

What is the difference between a dead baby and a Ferrari. There isn't a Ferrari in my garage.

what does dana do in her free time? make love with jarrett

What do you call someone who can legally murder? OJ Simpson

knock knock... whos there? NOT BIN LADEN!

how many dicks can you fit into mia khalifa's ass

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

What happened when the president cut the hedge That is a highly improbable solution because he would probably have a body guard do it.

why didn't the girl like that one guy? he hurt her, hurt her real bad.

What happens if you're caught strangling a purple leprechaun? You are taken to a mental institution because you have schizophrenia

A black man is escorted into a prison. He's the new warden, and he's been shown to his office.

A detective? I think more about that chip and dale thing, that was not funny, the classics are okay I suppose, but that newer thing detective-ish maybe. Uh... Do I get a clue? I have not like watched all of them.

Knock Knock.

A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to **** the **** until he ******. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.

How will the world end? That information is unknown

What is 9+10? 19

W. If I was one thing other then a person why would I be? M. The sun. W. Aww, so I brighten your day? M. No, you're just hard to look at.

How to shrink China's population in a few minutes? Nuke them all, simple.

whats the difference between marmalade and jam? you cant marmalade ur cock up a girls arse

Whats worse than the holocaust? Nothing.

So my wife was in the kitchen, and I asked her to make me a sandwich. She agreed. I then volunteered to make her one. Lesbian relationships are amazing.

A man walks into a bar........ gets eaten by a lion.

What did the lampshade say to the other lampshade? Nothing they sat in silence

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

A drunkard walked into a bar, and up to the bartender. He proceeded to the until he **. I proceeded to break down in immense frustration over censorship.