I hate it when people pour my cereal. They don't know how much I want. They don't know my life. They don't know what I've been through.

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A man walks into a bar, the bartender says, "why the long face?" the man replies, "my wife has terminal cancer and has been given 2 weeks to live."

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Whats big and red and eats rocks? A big red rockeater.

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A whole 'nother.

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Whats white, fat, and looks like a horse? An albino horse who apparently has a high chance of diabetes.

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How could you tell Adam and Eve wasn't black? ANSWER--YOU WOULDN'T BE ABLE TO TAKE A RIB FROM A BLACK MAN. ISSAIAH FROM OHIO YOLO:]

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Why did the duck cross road? It didn't, it got ran over.

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what happens when a migit and a horse have sex..... probably nothing

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Felix? The Lucky cat? That is the only thing that comes to mind, I am dead tired, but I really don't mind staying up until I cant anymore physically, as for mentally I am getting pretty bad as for company.

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Bitch

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Q) How many times did the woman jump off the cliff? A) Once she died.

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How do you confuse a terrorist? Speak another language other than Arabic

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was late for its laser bypass surgery.

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Why did the sloth cross the road? To slaughter your entire family.

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What do you call a black man driving an airplane? A pilot.

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Whats worse than stubbing your toe? Obama being re-elected

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Q: What's green and has four wheels? A: A green car.

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a naked man walks into a bar. he is promptly escorted out because you must have shoes and a shirt to be served

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Those who believe that Sarah Palin is dumb are living in some fantasyland. She could damn well speak as much as anyone else!

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Barny the purple dinosaur has no imagination, stuck his finger up his ass and called it masterbaition!

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What's worse then getting a broken bone? A large marsupial charging at you with vicious speed

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Dude, you're playing call of duty by yourself and in last place...HOW IS THAT POSSIBLE!!??

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My wife's star sign was Cancer and its quite ironic how she died really... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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Q: If Ann has 5 apples and she gives Michael 2 apples, and then Jason comes and rapes Ann. How many apples does Ann have left? R: Who the hell cares, she needs to go to the police.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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