John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt has a really long name.

they say a rolling stone gathers... speed until it reaches maximum potential speed and cannot go any faster.

Life is like the Titanic. You cruise along on course and everything is great -- until you hit an iceberg and 1,517 people die.

What's worse than a baby dying of AIDS? It depends upon one's frame of reference. A family living in the US might consider the death of a baby by AIDS a horrible act by the gods. But to a similar family in sub-Saharan Africa, this might be a regular, albeit tragic occurrence.

A dog says to a horse "Hey, why the long face?" the horse just looks at him.

what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

If you woke up in the morning feeling like P Diddy, get tested. Immediately.

the other day i was walking down the street and saw a black man carrying a tv. i thought to myself, "hey that looks like mine!" but then i was like nawwwwwww, mine's at home...... shining my shoes -_-

What's funnier than 10 dead babies? 11 dead babies.

Why did the dinosaur cross the road? It couldnt because a chicken was obscuring its path.

I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

Why was Martin Luther King shot? The shooter strongly disagreed with his viewpoints.

A Redhead, a Blonde, and a Brunette are all standing on top of a cliff in Ireland. They took a few pictures, and all in all it was a lovely vacation.

Why did the man have sex with other men? Because he was homosexual.

A cripple and a Jew walk into a bar. They sit down and begin to discuss all the stigmas that they have faced their entire lives. The conversation goes on for an hour, at which point a black man walks in. Just then, the bar explodes and they all die.

What do you call a guy with a puppy, candy, and a windowless white van? You're next baby sitter.

Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, I have a retinal hemorrhage

I know that a lot of people don't like morbid jokes, for it isn't everybody's cup of liquidized dead baby.

-Is your refrigerator running? -Yes. -Just wondering.

What did the golfer do on his vacation? He played golf.

What do you call it, when a jew makes fun of a black guy? Racism.

How many women can fit on a bus? It depends on the size of the bus.

Once there was this duck. he was the best dentist in the world...

When the going gets tough... Commit suicide.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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