Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It died.

A blonde walks into a bar. That's it.

awkies when jamie and jacob hook up, and u have to tell the dog..i maen danni that this has been going on for 2 months

Roses are red, Violets are glorious, Don't try to surprise Oscar Pistorius!

What do you call a straight A student that takes 6 Vicodin's, 5 Percocet's, and 7 Adderalls? I don't know, but he will most likely die of drug overdose.

What did the the White blood cell say to the bacteria? Nothing. Its a cell. It goes through phagocytosis.

Wanna hear a joke? no

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

Why cant kellen heller drive? She was born with the disabilities of being blind and deaf, thus rendering her unable to operate a vehichle.

Your momma's so fat: She feels uncomfortable in public due to current trends in ideal body shape and aesthetics of beauty.

a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

What do you call an animal with 4 legs ? A dog...

What is red and has two legs? Half a cat.

rodents are bed violents are glue i have lysdexia and short attention spa

roses are red violets are blue I suck at poetry time for lunch :D

How do you stop a little boy from annoying you? You chop his balls of. Why was the little boy sad? Because someone chopped his balls off.

How do you stop a bus? You try to wave down the bus driver, they're usually nice people who will stop for you if you put in some effort and act appreciative.

What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

Why was the wife disappointed in her husband? He hasn't been very talkative since the suicide.

what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

What do you call a pig that does karate? By its name. Pigs are often referred to by something regarding the 'Oink' sound that they make. Perhaps in this instance, the pigs name was Oinky. However, this is only a supposition. The range of names is really too wide to make a fair prediction.

what happened when the shoe turned into a shoe.......... nothing, it was a raisin

Knock Knock I have a door bell It's broken Oh

Go to this website and this game is an antijoke to laugh at http://iamhelenkeller.com/

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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