What did the fat man eat for breakfast? Nothing, he died of heart failure in the night.

What is a six letter word for cactus? Cactus

On a tusday night, three guys walk into a bar After realising they have to work they proceed to exit

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a canoe at him.

What do you call a blonde who can't read? an infant

A man walks into a bar said man is escorted out of said bar said man may have died from a serious case of alcohol poisoning whilst in said bar he was escorted as dead people have trouble moving of their own accord experts discovered later that the man had actually been brutaly beaten by another man wielding a bar stool this shows that experts are not very smart

How do you tell if a politician is lying? You make him take a polygraph test.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

What do you call a guy with a rubber toe? . . . . . . . Roberto

A man accidentally chops his thumb off while preparing his dinner for the night. He immediately calls an ambulance and has his thumb preserved which is later reattached back onto his hand. He then continues his dream career as a solo pianist.

A man was walking home when a little boy ran up to him. He said "hey mister, how do you sleep apples?" Then the man wasn't sure why he asked him so he spelled it out for him "that's easy my boy, A-P-P-L-E" the little boy said "you said pee pee!" Then he laughed and ran off

one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

How do you know if a woman is cheating on you? If you catch her cheating on you

How do you stop a dog from humping your leg? Suck its dick.

Why are anti jokes not funny.... Because they make sense.

what do u call a joke with no punchline? A non-harmful joke

Why did Anti-Joke.com close down? It didn't. If your reading this, the site is fully operational and up to date with your system.

what's blue , and you can urinate it? a rim block.

Q.How Do You Make 7 People Laugh? A.Tell Them a Good Joke.

Once upon a time there was a man that was exercising and he pulled a muscle and had to have his arm removed. The end.

Why did the 15 year old commit suicide? Because his parents and 3 sisters died in a car accident and he went to live with his uncle, who constantly raped him.

Question: What do you call the black guy wearing a white shirt? Answer: Steve. His parents game him the name at birth, and he is called that ever since.

There once was a man from Nantucket He decided to sail to Portland Now he lives in Portland.

A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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