They usually say "fuck" the police! But no one wants to fuck the police...

Hi I'm makena. I'm a cynical asshole

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Shah I'm being chased by a man riding instead a pig in a caravan smoking Apparently I'm a man riding on a pig in a caravan smoking

What do you call an African American sitting on a park bench? Elephant-man (I forgot to mention, he has a giant elephant trunk)

Why did the boy who didn't do his homework fall out off a tree? Because his overly obsessive mom threw a rock at him.

Knock Knock! Who's there? ... THE DOOR!!

What do you call a man having sex with his own mother. - Gross.

whats white jizz

Q. Why doesn't a woman need a wrist watch? A. Because they're actually becoming generally obsolete with the advent of the cell phone.

what would happen if american army lost their air supprt ? lmao

A Jewish man walkes into grocery store. He buys some groceries, and leaves.

A deaf man sits down puts on his headphones presses play on his ipod starts to nod his head and realises what he has just done

Send creepy emails to this email address: matt.harrington@highlandcatholic.org

Theres an irishman , scottish man and a welsh man on a plane they where going to france

How did the cookie monster die? Diabidies

Hey, dude, wanna hear a joke? Sure... Pussy. ...I dont get it... Exactly! HAHAHAHAHAHA

Why did Helen Kellers dog run away? It didn't. She did not own a dog.

*insert lame joke stolen from the top 10 jokes and act like it's original because I changed one word*

What is long and painful? It's a sword, get your mind out of the gutter.

HAHAHAHAHAHA.....shut up your joke isn't better.

-How much wood would a woodchuck chuck, if a woodchuck could chuck wood? -Probably a decent amount.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It felt like it, no particular reason. Why did the hippo cross the road? Same reason as the chicken. Why did the Fred cross the road? He was with animal control, and a chicken and hippo had just been reported to cross this dangerous stretch of highway.

A 14 year old boy's mother walks into his room whilst he is naked. The boy requests for his mother to leave; so she apologizes and leaves as the whole incident was rather embarrasing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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