Got a card in the mail from my estranged uncle today. Yep.

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what did the penguin use as a napkin? a napkin

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How can you tell if a woman is stupid? Yell the word "STUPID'' and see if she turns around.

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Knock knock Who's there? John Oh hello John come on in mate.

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A banana walks into a bar many people leave considering bananas certainly don't walk. many people are wondering if they are dreaming

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Whats sadder than 20 dead babies nailed to a tree? The Parents...

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Do you know how to save a drowning laywer? Approach with caution as drowing victims can panic, thus pushing you under. If possible throw a floatation device rather than go in yourself, or hold out a stick and instruct them to grab one end while you pull them in with the other. If necessary perform CPR. Call an ambulance and monitor for hypothermia.

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A gay man watches football.

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? A lot.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the chicken fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the monkey.

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A man walks into the kitchen tells the woman to make him a sandwich and walks out.

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What does an Eagle and a Mole have in common? The are both of the kingdom Animalia, possessing many organ systems and cellular similarities. And they both live underground. Except for the Eagle.

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what do you call cheese that isn't yours? not your cheese, you probably stole it.

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What did the chilean miner say to the other Chilean miner? I wish we could get out of here.

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yo momma so fat, Bob's furniture store is having a sale on wednesday at 5:00.

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Why was 95 lb jack able to chug so fast? Because he is a diabetic

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Whats the difference between right and left? I stabbed your mom with my left hand.

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How much signal does an Asian woman need to cut across 4 lanes? None

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Why did the little girl have grass stains on her white dress? Because she was dragged into the forest and raped.

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Your mum is SO fat... She died of a heart attack

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I scream, you scream, we all scream because we're getting murdered.

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Why do they call it "Unsweetened Tea?" Did they put sugar in it and then take it back out again?

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Q: Whats red and not a penis A: A lot of things

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If you don't see banners here, it doesn't mean they are not there...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops