A. why'd the chicken cross the road? B.a dog got hit by a bus.

I am green. You are blue. Jokes are infinite. This is too.

If life throws you lemons, what do you do? Well unless life throws you water and sugar also, hen your lemonade is gonna taste horrible.

what is purple and smells like poop? very weird looking poop

A horse walks into a bar. Realizing the severity of the situation, the bartender heads toward the exit... stumbling over a chair.

Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder and help him down

A man walks into a bar and breaks his nose, he asks the bartender for help The bartender says "no you're a f***ing idiot"

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have schizophrenia, and so do I.

How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

Why was the clown sad? Because he was found guilty of raping and murdering 33 young men, and sentenced to death for 12 of those murders by a jury of his piers.

How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

guess what? bannanas

Why did the bear turn red? Because he was emBEARessed. Nah just kidding, a hunter shot him.

Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me

Why did the kid cross the road? To show his friends that he had guts. And man, did he have guts.

What did the Jew say to the black guy? Hey whatsup?

Why did the boy wear glasses? Because he had bad eyesight.

An elephant walked into a bar. By bar I mean jungle. Elephants aren't capable of walking into a bar.

What can be smooth but also rough? Endoplasmic Reticulum

Why did the baby cross the road? Because he was stapled to the chicken.

Why was Helen Keller's leg yellow? Because her dog was blind too.

Your mama is so fat, we are all severely concerned for her health

A blonde was taking a Math exam, so she brought her Asian boyfriend with her. It turns out they were going to his father's retirement party afterwards.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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