Q:What happened when the bear walked into the bar? You cannot answer because you were seriously injured by the bear.

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what did the duck say to the monkey.............. QUACK!!!!!!!!

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what do you call 100 muslims on a plane? Passengers

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Why did the officer arrest the black man? Because he suspected him of littering. ...and because he was black.

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How do you stop a friendly bear from bouncing up and down on your front lawn? Shoot it in the neck.

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i should have been sad when my flashlight died.... but i was delighted.

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How does Lady Gaga like her meat? As a dress.

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Why was the boy crying in public with no clothes on? Because he had no clothes on in public.

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I cant believe they been together after all that shit. (person ask what) and you say your buttchheeeeks:]

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This sentence will not end the way you octopus.

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Q:What did the homeless guy say to the business man on the cell phone A: Nothing because he doesn't want to disturb his phone call

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Why couldn't the man sleep? Because he was a wax model in a museum, and as we all know wax models are inanimate objects thus incapable of consciousness and therefore incapable of unconsciousness as well. Many other inanimate objects are caught up in similar problems relating to their incapability to do anything.

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What's yellow and can't swim? A bulldozer.

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in a swimming pool? Determined.

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What did the mexican say when two houses fell on him? Nothing. He was dead.

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"Hey ask me if i'm fat" "Are you fat" "Leave me alone"

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S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

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What's the difference between an apple and a banana? One's an apple.

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Where did the two Jews ride when they got married? In the back of the oven.

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Knock knock stop knocking you idiot, it's the 21st century

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Come in! Come in who? I'm just com in' inside.

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roses are red violets are blue polar bears are white grass tends to be green

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What happens to the blond when she reaches the top of the stairs She falls down them

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks "why the long face?" the horse, confused, looks at the bartender with a bewildered look, neighs loudly, and runs out of the bar knocking over a few tables and chares.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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