Did you hear the one about Helen Keller? Neither did she.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

What is just as important as Woman's Rights? Woman's Lefts, to maintain equality.

Knock Knock Who's There Not you... What? *Pulls out finger gun* *Screams BOOM!*

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was walking.

What did Larry do when little Billys baseball crashed through his window? He raped and murdered little Billy for Larry has raped and murdered many children.

Man walks into a hotel on Friday, Stays for three days and leaves on Friday. How is this possible? A. His horses name was Friday

A boy got scratched by a dog and nearly killed him. When he grew up, a dog came running up to him and started biting and scratching him till he couldn't handle it. Then a plane crashed into him and he died.

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies on fire and a pile of living babies on fire? The dead babies are usually not as loud.

How many Cancer patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Cancer does not affect one's ability to install light bulbs.

If you had 4 oranges in one hand and 7 oranges in the other, what would you have? Really big hands.

What is worse then losing your remote? Falling off a cliff landing on a sharp rock and dying slowly.

What is a black guys favourite thing to eat? Food.

Roses are crimson. Violets are purple. I don't understand why this poem is so popular.

A musician without any music walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Who do you think you are, a hobbit?" The musician without any music says,"yeah" and turns into a hobbit

What's red and can't find a family? A fire hydrant

How did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. On its way there, he got hit by a bus.

What do you call a boomerang that doesnt come back? A stick.

if you don't like this you're gay

Q: What did the homless man get for chritsmas? A: Frostbite

what did hitler say when the allies invaded germany i did NAZI that coming

Roses are red, Violets are Blue Last night was amazing, I have Aids

Q: What did the Jewish man say to the Muslim man? A: Hello, how are you today? Nice weather we're having, isn't it?

a cow walked into a bar and asked for a large whiskey on the rocks, 'long day, eh' said the barman, 'yes' replied the cow, 'first a large moving obstical was cutting down my food, and then my friend was raped from his milk.'

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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