What starts with C and ends with UNT. Ciretrunt

Why Did The Boy Fall Off The Swing? Because He Had No Arms.

A red-head, a brunette and a blond are trapped on an island 10km from civilization. The red-head swims 1.5km's, but is to tired, so she swims back to the island. The brunette swims 3km's, but is too tired, so she swims back to the island. After watching the first two fail, the blond evaluates the situation and decides that she does not possess the swimming ability required to reach the 5km point (At which swimming back to the island becomes equally as far as swimming to civilization), and instead stays on the island and creates a signal fire out of bits of debris scattered on the island, getting rescued within hours.

Q. Whats the diffrence between a squirl and a chipmunk? A. A squirl has a squirl mom and a squirl dad while a chipmunk has a chipmunk mom and a chipmunk dad.

what do you call someone who cant breathe? dead

Knock Knock. Not home.

A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for winter and now I am dead." It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

Two guys walk into a bar together. They are diagnosed with a concussion and later on in life have serious brain issues

You are walking down the street. You see 3 black people and you don't talk to them because they are complete strangers.

how much fish could a chicken

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side!

You know what is funnier than 24???? I don't know that's why I was asking

Ice cream rules kids are great how thinks of this? Michael Jackson

Ask me if I'm wearing pants. Are you wearing pants? Yeah.

What did the black boy wear for Halloween? A costume.

What happens when a baby stops crying? it dies.

How do u wake up lady gaga You go into her room and yell at her

Q: Why did the man die of starvation??? A: He didn't eat for 3 days!!

What do call a man with no arms or no legs that sits on the couch? Grandpa after his amputations.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind and deaf.

I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

Did you hear about the three Arabs that hijacked a plane? They drove it into the Pentagon.

what's worse than a pile of dead babies? a pile of dead babies with a live one at the bottom eating its way out.

Brother: Where is my Guitar? Me: To the Left to The left Brother : No its not Me: Everything you own in the box to the to the left Brother : Im telling Mom Me: In the Closet Thats my stuff and if i bought please don't touch Brother: *Opens Closet* This is all Mine! Me: *Takes off headphones*? Huh? Brother: Nevermind - _ -

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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