What's the worst part about eating a vegetable? Putting her back in the wheel chair.

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69...you know how awkward this is now...

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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you pick up 10 students from a school, you buy a pish from the fet store, and then drive to new york whos driving the bus? a fat guy with a level 80 org in world of warcraft

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Knock. Knock. Who's there? Banana. Banana who? Are you mentally handicapped? Bananas are fruit.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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How many pancakes does it take to lift up a dog house? Silly goose, alligators can't fly!

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why couldn't the tree grow? Because I cut it down with a chainsaw

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In which state does the Mississippi River flow in? Liquid.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? About 800 pounds

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How many squirrels does it take to screw out a light bulb? None because squirrels lack the strength and mind set to screw out a light bulb.

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

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A horse walks into a bar and the bar tender asks "Why the long face?" The horse says nothing because its a horse. It then poops on the floor and leaves

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Why was the man so angry? Because the woman was not in the kitchen

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Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

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What do Mike Tyson's handwriting, the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and your Grandma's apple pie have in common? Nothing.

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Why are leprechauns so happy? The grass tickles their balls

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Women's Rights..

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Hey i just met you, and this is crazy, i have amnesia, i'm Skepta

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how many friends does tomas have 0 he is a loner

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What did the farmer say when he finally found his tractor? 'Where's my tractor?'

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Why do elephant tusks stick out? For uprooting trees and bushes, and for defending their young.

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KNOCK KNOCK whos there Malcom i dont know any Malcom go away!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops