One day a duck was swimming on the lake and sees an alligator. The alligator says "You will be my next victim." The duck says "Quack."

Geography Teacher: What caused the earthquake of Japan? Me: Godzilla constipated too hard, and it caused an earthquake. Tsunami was the result of his poo. Geography Teacher: then how do you explain the after shocks...? Me: Godzilla shat his pants after the toilet

Why did the boy fall out of the tree? He died Why did the other boy fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the first Why did the third boy fall out of the tree? Prepressure

Why did mallisa get to go to the bar instead of jeremy... jeremy has prostate cancer and he needs to be examined every 2 1/2 minuites plus he's 7 years old.

Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but smell this towel, you won't remember a thing.

Gary: Stick your tongue out and say "I live in a pirate ship" Bruce: *sticks tongue out* "I lib inna pile of shiiit."

whats worse then a truck full of babies? if it went off a cliff into a canyon full of knives.

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What do you call a black man standing on a podium? Slave trade

My father stole my mothers heart, he's in jail for murder

Knock Knock. Who's there? Doctor. Doctor Who? Doctor Watson - I'm here to see your little sister who is currently terminally ill and every second is of vital importance. Therefore this exchange of words is only worsening the already terrible situation that we find ourselves in. Please open the door.

a grasshopper walks into a bar the bartender says hey we have a drink named after you the grasshopper says what dave?

what did the prostitute say to the black man after they had sexual intercourse? I have aids

Why did kenny the koala fall out of the tree? becuase kenny was dead. Why did kesha the koala fall out of the tree? because she was hit by kenny while he was falling.

Hi I'm Ben What's your name? I forgot. Hi "I forgot" what's your name? Ben

What is Hellen Keller's favorite TV show? She doesn't have one - She is blind and deaf.

Q: What is strange about Arabs? A: Very little.

Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust Whats worse than finding a repeated joke on anti joke? The holocaust

Whats better than 1 person in your oven? 9 people in your oven.

A black guy walks into a bar with a dog. He is asked to leave because his dog is not on a lead.

What size pants did the gorilla wear? An abnormaly large pair compared to the average human because their weight and width are porportionaly larger for their speices.

why is kool-aid so sweet? Because it contains sugar

How old are you? 7

a man walked into a bar because he needed a part time job to support his family.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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