How many dead babies can you fit in a bath tub? 17

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what's worse than falling and scraping your knee? living within a 10 mile radius of a Japanese nuclear reactor

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What did the cannibal say after he ate the clown? I am not sure as the tragic situation occurred while the clown was hiking alone.

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Two chavs jump off a cliff, who wins? Neither. Leaving aside the fact that two people would jump off a cliff in any kind of competitive context is highly improbable, due to the laws of physics objects fall at the same speed and therefore both people would hit the ground at the same time, meaning that, unless either of them deployed a parachute mid way through, they would, in fact, be in a dead heat.

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Knock Knock Who's there? Orange Orange who? Sorry, what? your door is kind of thick.

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Why did the chicken croos the road? It didnt, my father caught him and cooked him for dinner.

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You- I came up with a new word! Friend- What is it? You- Plagiarism.

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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What happens when a man goes to college? He gets a degree and graduates most of the time or he fails miserably.

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You: Want to hear a joke? Person: Yeah You: Me too

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A brick

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What do you do to become a hairdresser? Set Off the fire alarm

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Roses are red Grass is green Get in the van If you know what I mean

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Can you spot the polar bear Probably not because global warming killed it

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a guy went to a bar and ordered a molotov cocktail. he died.

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I wumbo, you wumbo, he, she, wumbo, wumbology the study of wumbo

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leedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedleleedlele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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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I'd like to make a withdraw

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jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

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What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

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What did the deaf-blind kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

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I am thinking of a number between 1 and 100 what is it There are many numbers between 1 and 100 so it is highly unlikely that I will guess the right number

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Santa Claus is so hairy he need to shave more often.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops