- Anti Joke

Your mothers so ugly that when memory sees her it says " Damn-it I hate my job!

Man- Where can I find a book on the holocaust Book keeper- Have you tried comedy? Man- no I havent Book keeper- good it won't be there

how much fish could a chicken

Q: what do you call a hooker you pay in spaghetti? A: a pasta-tute.

What's the difference between tires and a black guy? Tires don't scream once there are chains around them. ;)

Your moms so fat she weighs 200 kilograms

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, My vagina is Red, Im on my period.

A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread

roses are red violets are blue hey fu i'm making stew out of my own poo

Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She got shot in the head by her drunk step-dad.

Whats the difference between a black man and a bike? I don't enjoy riding bikes.

Q: Why didn't the bunny eat the carrot? A: The bunny didn't have any carrots. Poor bunny.

what do yo call two dog? dogs.

A man walks inti a bar and asks for a drink, he shows the bartender his ID and is kicked out because the man is underaged.

what did little johnny get his grandfather for christmas?nothing his grandfather died on thanksgiving

Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

What did the Asian dad say to his son when he got an A- in math? Good job son.

This "anti-joke" got me an A+ many many years ago, shortened though, so you can make Your own conclusions. Beware of the rising sight, do not stare at the sunny dry sky... The poles... Do not stare at the blood as it drips it, the sand covered ground soaked red... Cover your ears! The seal is not looking above, with but is shouting to you! "WHY DID YOU FORSAKE ME!!!" HE ASKS AS YOU AGAIN AND AGAIN HIT HIM, smirking sadistically, SMILING, yes... Even LAUGHING! The rain soaks you wet, as the skies themselves cry and hide in shame... ...The seal is broken, so watch as your kin, those among your children twist to hellish beasts whose demon is the only name they bear... Readying to conquer the world! ...Yet they need to be certain, to be certain that your master is gone, yet we have waited FOR TOO DAMN LONG! The master answers no more, darkness covers the skies as the blood soaked earth beyond your feet decays, yet you feel no fear, no adrenaline pumping, no tears, no soul crushing fear! What kind of MONSTER ARE YOU? Darkness falls, you struggle with no defense... No excuse... You BROKE THE SEAL! The first three awaken, as the conquest of this world IS AT HAND OF THE DEMONS! ...This leads to war... To strife, to disease!... Until you cannot run no more... Hope... You fall to your knees saying your last prayers, as the pale one appears before you... Jesus? No, his hateful father which abandoned you over two thousand years ago... ...Salvation you shout to the skies! Our savior is here! As the forces of darkness stare in defeat... Yet as his father, the father of sin, the father of the seal gazes into your soul with red eyes and demonic teeth and laughs, you no longer wonder where is your God, nor what has he become... ...But rather what you made him, the light of glory, now the new KING OF DARKNESS! AND ALL THANKS TO YOU MOCKING THE MEMORY OF HIS SONS DEATH! You had it coming, this world belongs to us... And we are not your kind... TRUE GLORY BE KNOWN TO ALL! THE ERA OF THE TRUE DEMONS IS OVER! ...You are the last remaining, lying on the floor broken, the very last words you hear... ...Revenge is mine! Humanity is dead... You feel the holy spirit, yet all you feel is satisfied quenched screams of centuries, even millenia of revenge... ...Rule new children of the dark, humanity is taking its deepest, saddest last breaths, "The death of my only true son, shall no longer pass me by" God has finally returned... But not to save you... ...God is against you! and you know why FAR TOO WELL!... :You know far too well who I am... But then again, do you know me and what I am at all? You will... Soon enough children of the forsaken one... Because I am his prophet.

(Pretend you're an orphan.) Knock knock. Who's there? Not your parents.

What did the resently released criminal get for his birthday? a nice sweater

Knock knock! Who's there? Alexis. Hi, come in!

A man reaches to grab a womans chest and then realizing hes gay, backs off and everyone goes home happy

What do you call hunter ? An anerexic that is skinny as a tooth pick. Duh

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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