What happened to the turtle that was on land Dead

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what did the obese kid get for chistmas? an athsma attack ,which led to death.

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How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

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A man walks into a bar. He then takes a step back and notices that his head hurts.

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Q: What do you get when you mix root beer with a cloud? A: Nothing, you idiot.

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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What do a plum and a bunny have in common? They're both purple. Except the bunny.

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why didn't the unicorn have a horn? It was a horse. Why didn't the horse have a horn? it was not a unicorn.

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If a man shouts in a forest and there is no woman around to hear him, is he still wrong? He could be, he could not be. It really depends on what he says. The greater concern is that he's shouting alone in the forest. Either he's in trouble or he has a major psychology disorder.

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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Why did the chicken cross the road .... The traffic light turned red

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Why do things made by Glen taste so good? Because he has mastered the cream

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i like candy and other things that are edible... please dont thumbs down just cuz this suxxx just put thumbs up and santa claus will haunt u :)

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why was the boy sad? there was a frog stapled to his face.

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What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

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What do a Nazi and a Democrat have in common? They are both members of a highly supported political faction.

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I'm attracted to you like the earth is attracted to the sun. With a force that is inversely proportional to the distance squared.

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Three penguins sitting in a tub. The first penguin says to the third penguin, "Hey would you pass the soap?" The penguin in the middle says, "What do you think I am a typewriter?"

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Who do u talk to when everyone is ignoring you? Nobody will talk to you so what's the point?

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How do you confuse a bar tender? You ask him how tender he is.

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what happened to the man that got shot.... He died.. 3 secs after

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What do you call a black man on a rope swing? Usually whatever his first name is, but if he goes by a nickname you should use that

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What do you call a dead guy under the ocean? Murder.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops