Jimmy Saville

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What kind of shoes does a pedophile wear?white vans

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Why did seven eat nine? Because six was afraid of him.

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I Couldn't afford a hair cut... so i purpposely contracted HIV

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There's a black man in my family tree. Therefore, I could be considered biracial.

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So three men walk into a bar and buy a round of drinks for everyone. As they do this, three kenyans die of dehydration while their families weep at their feet.

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Knock knock, Who's there Why did the chicken cross the road? Idiot.

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I heard a joke one time about a Rabbi, a Priest, and a little boy. It wasn't funny.

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A white kid, a black kid, and an Asian kid all try out for the basketball team. Which one makes the team? All of them, because they are all very good.

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Who's a tool and a NARC? Josh Brami!

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What do you call a deer in the wild? a deer

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You know why one side of the "v" formation of a flock of geese is longer don't you? Cause it has more geese in it.

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A man walks into a bar. Splash.

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why did the chicken cross the road? it didn't it got hit by a bus.

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Why did Ben Franklin Invent Bifocals? He's a jive turkey.

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Why did the jew put a parking meter on his roof.? ....So santa would have to pay to park.

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In soviet Russia, your dead because it doesn't exist anymore

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Why did Jimmy fall over? Jimmy was hit by a bus.

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Is your refrigerator running? Yes. Good because it is important to keep food chilled to prevent it from spoiling and wasting you money

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What's the difference between Paris Hilton and a cow? Cows are ruminants, meaning that they have a digestive system that allows use of otherwise indigestible foods by regurgitating and rechewing them as "cud". Paris Hilton, on the other hand, is a human being. Therefore, her stomach digests the bolus (masticated food) only after it has exited the oesophagus into the body of the organ, where it is digested into chyme and then passed through the pyloric sphincter into the duodenum.

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A man asked a guy in a store for football cleats The guy got all confused because footballs cannot wear cleats

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Roses are red I got a new phone But no one to text Forever alone

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Knock Knock Who's there

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Three guys walk into a bar. Soon after another man tries to walk in, but is stopped by the bouncers because the bar was at capacity.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops