Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Knock, Knock... Whose there? No one... you have no friends.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A black man walked out a window of a 20 story building a detective arives at the scene it was night time and he said wheres the body.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's black, smoking, and sitting at the top of the stairs? Steven Hawking after a house fire.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

This is SPARTA! SPARTA? THIS IS MADNESS! (kicks guy down well) What is hurt! Baby dont love me, dont love me, no more. Moral: The funny thing is probably that the line makes a lot more sense all of sudden does it not?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How do unwed mothers celebrate Mother's Day? The same way all mothers do.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Whats 2 Plus 2? God Just Solve It.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

"This is the best of all possible anti-jokes," said Pangloss.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the Mexican cross the border? He was hoping to achieve greater economic prosperity and well-being for his family. penis.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

How long does it take jimmy hoffa to screw in a light bulb? A: Jimmy Hoffa is dead and incapable of screwing in a light bulb, however if you change the tense of the question to "how long WOULD Jimmy Hoffa HAVE TAKEN to screw in a light bulb" then the approximate answer would be around 1 1/2 minutes if Mr Hoffa had proper dexterity an motor control that was comparable to the average human.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's long, hard, and contains semen? A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why could the penguin not fly? It was shot in the wing.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

what do you call a fat man standing in the middle of the street a fat man

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red violets are blue i have aids and now so do you

thumb_up thumb_down +2

chinga tue madre Ryan

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Boy it's sure cold out today. Die

thumb_up thumb_down +2

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

whats the difference between 10 Ferrari's and 10 dead babies ? i dont have 10 Ferrari's in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms. Why couldn't she get up? Because she had no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

A group of young men walks into a bar. They drink some booze, laugh, have a great time and then go home to sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

So, there's a man and a bar. He gets a hacksaw.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops