why did you poop because you are a poop

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Roses are red My bulb is blue My pants are extending When I look at you

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the user is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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You have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars. You both have the same amount of money.

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Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

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What time is it? 2:47 PM.

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Why can't you hear a pterodactyl going to the bathroom? Because dinosaurs died out 65.5 million years ago.

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What did the dinosaur say to the centipede? It's funny cause the dinosaur is big and the centipede is small.

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How much does Michael Vick love his dogs? More than Casey Anthony loved her daughter.

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Q: how do you get an clown off a unicycle A:You hit it with a police baton

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Why didn't the man go to work on Friday the 13th? Because he was unemployed.

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Roses Are Red Violets Are Blue I Have ADD ...

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Four black guys have a picnic. One of them pulls out a bag of KFC. Another pulls out some Kool Aid. The third pulls out a watermelon. The fourth pulls out a box of cookies you racist prick

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If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm Helen Keller Everything's black

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what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

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If my wife has got 6 oranges in one hand and 6 apples in the other hand, what has she got? No chance of stopping an uppercut.

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What's black and white and red all over? A racially integrated society.

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What's the difference between a leopard and a jaguar ? The rabbit flies faster, while the pigeon can breathe underwater.

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Q: Why did the kid get Christman presents in August? A: Because it was cheaper than chemotherapy.

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Then none of us want to be right.

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A Mexican, a Jew, and a Colored guy walk into a bar, the bartender looks up and says: "What can I get you gentlemen today?"

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A goose walks into a bar. Maybe he should have ducked.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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