Knock Knock Who's there? Ken. Can I some and use your toilet, I really need a shit.

roses are red violets are blue i have Alzheimer whats a rose?

Why did the boy fall off the bike? Because he was a paraplegic.

"Why is Barney purple and green?" "Because the producers of the show decided to make him that way"

What is brown and sticky?… A shit…

Why did Little Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.

Hey Shea

Why is the melon having a wedding? Because it cantaloupe.

hi little boy you want some candy i dont know do you want some candy you creeper

Why cant Sally ride her bike? Because she has ceribal pausly

Knock Knock. Doors open

"Knock-knock." "Come in, sorry that the doorbell is broken."

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall, He cracked his skull and died on impact. He will be missed.

Roses are black Violets are black Everything is black. I am blind.

how do you stop a baby from crying? Slit its throat

What starts with f and ends in uck? Firetruck.

MR MCANN WHAT COLOUR IS YOUR PUBES ?

knock knock WHO'S THERE?! ARE YOU A SEX CRIMINAL?! NO ONE WANTS TO DO THAT TO YOU MUM!

In a tangential universe Crispin Glover is the head of scientology

A black guy and a Mexican are in a car, who's driving? The taxi driver.

What did the rugby post say to the tree? Good evening George!

What is the difference between a black man and a bench? The bench is a piece of wood, while the black man is a human being.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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