I really want to know something would all of you like to go on Suspension for 3 weeks? Mr Goodwin

A carpenter walks into a bar. After ordering some wine he tells the bartender that one of his 12 friends will betray him. He also says that once he was captured, the government will execute him on a wooden cross for everyone to see. The bartender in disbelief says to the man "You gotta be kiddin' me, do you think you're Jesus or something?" The man throws his glass of wine to the floor, grabs the bartender by his collar, and says "Hey man, I ordered red wine, not white wine you bastard!" After a few minutes, a group of nurses escort the insane loon back to the mental clinic. The bartender never saw the man again and proceeds to sweep that mess the psycho left on the floor.

A baby seal walks into a club.

Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

What's an X-BOX? A box where you find a treasure

What is the difference between a pig and a crow? One is a animal that Is butchered to be eaten as a wonderful meat product. And the other is a pretentious asshole bird that no one likes.

How do you know when everybody on a plane crash is dead ? When your the only one who walked out

how do u make a snooker table laugh? TICKLE ITS BALLS HAHA

A praying mantis is very graceful

Why did the little girl run to her mother? Because she saw a police inspector, who had already tried to kill her several times that week, aiming a poison dart at her forehead.

What do gay horses eat? Horse dick.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, This is a poem, Whoop-dee-do.

Whats worse than Sandy Hook Massacre? 9/11

Q: Why couldn't the blonde add 10 and seven on a calculator? A: She couldn't find the 10 key.

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what did the duck say to the other duck Quack

There was once a little boy who started feeling sick. His mother gave him some soup. He died anyway.

How old are you? 7

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What the **** did i just do? I have no clue......

If life give you lemons, throw them at people.

Q: What present did the Taliban's wife get on the islamic holiday A: a beating

what happens when steven hawking walks into a bar? everyone cheers at the miracle of science.

Roses are shut the f*** up. Violets are shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up. Shut the f*** up.

How many electricians with a suitable ladder does it take to change a bulb? If the bulb fitting is now obsolete it may not be possible.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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