What did John name his dog? Doggy

What do you call a black man standing on a sidewalk? Preferably race shouldn't matter in this situation, but in most social circumstances the man would be described as black to elucidate the person being depicted.

what's the difference between a duck? one leg's the same.

what did the cop say to the robber... freeze bitch hope you like prison food and penis

Roses are red Violets are red Grass is red OMFG MY LAWN IS ON FIRE !!!?

A baby seal walks into a club.

Q :Why did the girl fall off the swing? A: She had no arms.

who is the shortest man in the world? ADITYA DEV

Knock Knock there's a doorbell

make me a sandwich! what kind?

Did i just hear a joke about birds? No? Well this is Hawkward.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She has no arms. Knock Knock "Who's there?" Not Sally!

Roses are red Violets are blue The sky is also blue

Why is Osama Bin Laden scared of the dark? To be honest, I don't know, and I doubt you do either. Osama Bin Laden has been a fugitive on America's Top Ten Most Wanted list for over 10 years; there is no way that you could possibly know such personal information about him if the United States government can't even locate him and prosecute him for the heinous crimes he committed against the U.S. Don't ever lie to me again.

A group of 8 paintbal professionals land on an island to battle another paintball team. The team is then faced by a challeng of the other team ambushing them. Everyone is okay and not touched. A case breaks the window of the bus they hide in. They open the case and find a bullet proof vest. A man placed the vest on himself. They made it one by one out of the bus and to the otherside of the field the man with the vest was shot and started going... eghegeheghdjrhherbehgh and they pulled out a real gun bulet. They were now under attack by an enemy with real amunation. Then next man to run across the fied was killed. Tehy ran fr their lives.

Q: What did the dog say the cat? A: nothing, because dogs cannot speak, and even if they could, I highly doubt they would speak cat.

what did the homeless kid get for christmas? nothing he probably doesn't know what christmas is

Haikus are simple but sometimes they don't make sense refrigerator.

If a brick said "hi" what you reply with? Nothing. You can't reply to something that doesn't speak.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A hurt animal that should promtly be taken to the RSPCA for surgery.

How do you get a black guy out of a tree? hit him in the head with an axe

What is white and shaped like a refrigerator? A refrigerator.

A woman gets into the front seat of a car and starts driving.

What's worse than stepping on a piece of gum? A clown following you around all day throwing toothbrushes at you. ___ Zertop™

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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