What do you do if you see a black man in your backyard with a bullet wound in his head? Take him to the hospital.

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Ask me if I'm a cucumber. Are you a cucumber? No.

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what's the best way to get your younger sibling to stop being annoying? Shoot Him

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An animal entered my house tonight ! It could only be one thing : A bear or a dog.

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A: What do you call a female bombing the white house? Q: A terrorist

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Roses are red Violets are T I T S I like T I T S T I T S

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You were born.

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue I'm really drunk so show me your tits.

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Yo momma is so stupid that the only test she passed was the mental retardation test.

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A) why did the black guy leave the bar B) cause he was tired and wanted to go home

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what did johnny's dad say to him after his baseball game? nothing because johnny's dad was an abusive alcoholic who beat him until the neighbors found out and called the police. the dad was arrested, tried in court then promptly thrown in jail were he was raped in the showers repeatedly by a very large and intimidating black man. he vomited suicide in his cell today by drinking drain cleaner

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what did joe eat for breakfast? he didn't eat, joe is schizophrenic steve's best friend

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roses are gray, violets are grayer, f*ck this poem and listen to the slayer.

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What did the disrespectful cow say to his parents? Mooo. I hate you both

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I SWEAR TO GOD I'M NOT GAY! But my boyfriend is. Love you, Jeff.

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Go online. why? To get a quote. why? To save money. why? Because we said so! Parenting can be hard. See how easy it is to save with GEICO.

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why was the blond so easy,because ALL blonds are whores.

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Why are pills white? Cause they work.

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Knock knock Who's there? Owl Owl who? Owl Johnson, your neighbor. Oh hi Owl, please come in.

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people say i have big feet but you know what the say about people with big feet? :) big socks. sl

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What did the Farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Where's my tractor?"

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two friends are hanging out, one says to the other "whats 5 plus 5" the other says, "you know i didnt finish school and i dont appriceate you making fun of me" the other boy looks away and walks off

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Your mama's so stupid, she gave birth to YOU.

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Why was the Mexican lucky to have a job? Due to the failing economy, lack of available jobs, and amount of people getting laid off, it was considered lucky to have a job.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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