- Anti Joke

You're momma is so dumb, she has troubles passing her math unit and should seriously consider a math touter

rock-a-bye baby on the treetop When the wind blows The bass will drop!

roak

Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

What's big and green and I gets stuck in your teeth will kill you? A tractor

A man walks into a bar. The initial impact knocks him violently to the ground, where he lies gasping in agony. Flustered and in a state of psychological shock, he shakily reaches up and touches his head in an attempt to asses the damage he has sustained and establish the seriousness of the situation. He lets out a resigned whimper when he realises his hands are stained a deep red. More blood gushes in torrents from his left temple, and the man chokes on his vomit as he writhes on the ground uncontrollably, incessant waves of pain washing over him. The protruding metal bar left so carelessly in his path has done a lot more damage than the man is aware of. His skull has been shattered in several places and he has suffered additional fractures to his cheek bone and jaw. Also, the sheer force at which the man has collided with the bar means that he is severely concussed and the onset of brain haemorrhage is becoming very likely. Brain haemorrhage is a very common cause of strokes and, if left untreated, the bleed will almost certainly kill the man in later life. However, the chances of the man reaching this stage in his life are now almost non-existent. He is losing copious volumes of blood from the wounds sustained to his face, and is becoming weaker by the second. He needs a blood transfusion immediately if he is to live. But nobody is there to go to his aid. The harsh reality is, he is doomed...

A guy walked into a restaurant. He sat down and had a lovely meal left the restaurant got in his car and went home. The End

why didn't the donkey go to the party? Because, unfortunately he did not have the required linguistic skills to communicate with the person inviting. This is obviously dependent on whether the person who invited him was a human, if it was another donkey then perhaps this would of happened. However, this is also very unlikely as donkeys do not have parties or really communicate

What did the man say to gguy we are both g

Q: Why is asprin white? A: It works.

why did the plane crash?.............the pilot was a tomato

why couldn't the girl make her bed? she is homeless.

What was the last thing that went through the crashing helicopter pilot's head? The propeller.

What did Tiger Woods do when he saw a woman taking her shirt off? He looked the other way so he could make his birdie putt

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Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 has been convicted on multiple accounts of murder and Grievous Bodily Harm

Praise Paisley

Why did sally drop her ice cream? She got hit by an 18 wheeler Knock knock Whos there not sally

Knock knock. Who's there? It's Tyler Oh hey, come in

A newly wed couple is at the beach and the wife asks for sunscreen and the man says he forgot it in the car. He goes to the car only to find that the car had been broken into. He goes to call his wife and they go back to the car only to find that the car had been stolen. #Turns out the thief broke the window to steal the car but saw the owner coming and hid behind a bush and upon the man going to call his wife he continued with his mission

There is no "i" in "team," but there are two in "indigo."

A Japanese man, a Canadian man and a French woman walk into a bar. They do not converse because they don't speak the same language.

Why did the male propagate the female? Because he was drugged. Slyly, this foxy female had slipped the male the date rape drug and a dangerous amount of viagra. During intercourse, the male ripped a gaping hole in the female's stomach and killed her. He woke up confused inside a dead stinking corpse.

What did the little boy say to a stranger? Nothing. He is very shy, and his parents always said to never talk to strangers.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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