a morman walks into a bar, he buys a 7up.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it had Alzheimers and forgot that he lived on the other side of the street.

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What do you call a Mexican that is jumping off a building? A suicidal jumper!

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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Why did I write this joke Because I'm board as hell

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knock knock who's there? F uck F uck who? F uck off

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Why did a kid throw a clock out the window? Because he was adopted

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A woman who lived alone with her parrot left her apartment to run to the store, forgetting that a plumber was scheduled to come and fix her sink. A few minutes later, the plumber arrived and knocked on the door. The parrot inside called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, "it's the plumber. I've come to fix the sink." The plumber waited for a bit and, seeing that nobody was coming to the door, knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber replied, a little more loudly, "it's the plumber! I've come to fix the sink!" Again the plumber waited. After a few more minutes, he knocked again. The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber yelled, as loudly as he could, "IT'S THE PLUMBER! I'VE COME TO FIX THE SINK!" Still, nobody came to the door. The plumber banged the door repeatedly, The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?" The plumber screamed "IT'S...THE...PLUMBER!!! I'VE...COME...TO...FIX...THE...SIIIIIIINK!!!" and then, consumed with rage, clutched his chest and fell over dead from a stress-induced heart attack. A few minutes later, the woman returned home and, while opening her door, noticed the plumber lying dead in her hallway. She looked at her parrot and asked, "Who is it?" The parrot called out, "WHO IS IT?"

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Why is the little boy sad? His parents died in a car crash.

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A Muslim walks into a bar He immediatley turns around and leaves as his religious beliefs forbid consumption of alcoholic beverages.

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My friend is a famous actor. Fooled you! I have no friends.

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what did the man say to then other man when he said a joke, "Ha"

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A dyslexic walks into church and asks the priest. "Father is there a dog."

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What's Blue And Fat? A Brick. I like to lie a lot.

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hers a joke... japanese people

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What did one door say to the other door? - Nothing, doors can't talk

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Why did the black basketball team beat the white basketball team? They practiced more

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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snowglobe

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Chicken. Chicken who? That's right.

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So this guy was making a sandwich...

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first

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5 blondes walk into a bar They all leave very intoxicated and die in a car accident shortly after.

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whats the hardest part about eating a vegitable getting your mouth around the wheelchair.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops