why did kermit cry?Ms.Piggy knocked him out on Christmas and he slept through the party and all of the presents

What did the black fire-fighter do when the house caught fire? The heroic man ran inside and got every animal and person inside to the out side and then proceeded to extinguish the flames with his fire-extinguisher out, thus saving most of the families valuables. He was then awarded a raise in his salary for his heroic valor. Although any fire-fighter could have done this because of the hard work and dedication that is put into training. So really describing the race that this heroic man is was totally pointless.

How do you kill a blind man, run over him in slow motion

What's green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

What did one ginger say to the other? W are both gingers.

whats funnier than a banana an orange -may bieber

Q: What's worse than biting into and apple and finding a worm? A: being severely malnourished, thus physically inept to do most simple tasks

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

If the blue man lives in the blue house, and the yellow man lives in the yellow house, who lives in the white house? The blue man. He has made a good living with a high salary and has enough money to afford two houses.

What do u call something that's sticky and in a stick form? A glue stick :)

what is the difference between an octopus and a dead dolphin? one as tentacles the other is dead.

Why did Romney loose the election? Because Obama had more votes

what's wose than finding a holocaust in your anti-joke? the potential offspring of courtney love and al gore

what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It's really irrelevant when you realize this joke is about a suicidal chicken...

whats the difference between 69 and 6.9 theres a period in the middle

How many people like gang rape? 9 out of 10

Why did the all black baseball team beat the all white baseball team? Because the black team scored more runs than the white team.

How many kids does it take to get a day off of school? ...26

A woman asked me today if I'd ever tried crazy golf. I hadn't actually ever tried it.... So I replied "no".

Why is Megan Fox so hot? Because the air conditioning broke.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the lesbian's house. Knock knock. Who's there? The chicken.

what do you call a bunch of black people running down a hill Exercise

One time, I saw this guy on stilts and thought it would be hilarious if someone pushed him over. Then some guy pushed him over and broke his neck.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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