How do you confuse a blonde? Paint yourself green and throw forks at her.

How many holes can you poke in my chest, When my chest is by far the best If you believe you can stab Then then grab a knife...that you can grab Skewer my breast Which lies on the best chest And you will discover A man under your covers Yes, keep on pokin' Poke my chest with the knife you are strokin' And then swallow a chode because you are stupid.

Q) What is black, white, and red all over? A) A zebra that just became the kill of a hungry carnivore

What do u call a gay dinosaur Tyran a sore arse

Take part of what?

A black man walks out of a police station

Teachers be like "Hold on class, I am almost done with my lesson!" Students: " Aint nobody got time 4 dat!"

A man drives down the road in a van that says "Candy" He was doing his job in a professional manner

Q:why is walmart so big? A:Years ago a man named Sam Walton had a vision for one stop shopping. And it goes without saying that being a one stop shop must mean you have a lot of inventory thus the size of Walmart is a lot larger to hold and support the increased mass of inventory .

HEY YOU! TISSUE!

If your Jewish, then don't go to Germany.

What did the statue say to the other statue? stat-you?

why did the dog went inside the church? because the door was open.

How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to drop it and die of gas poisoning.

Why was the girl's clitoris cut off? Her country practiced Sharia Law.

Knock Knock Who's there? Jehovah Witness

Why shouldnt you take the virginity of a 14 year old? Their pre-frontal lobe is not developed enough to sufficiently judge the affect of this action on their life.

Mom says my name I reply Coming.

Why did the boys shout ZACHATTACK? Because zach was attacking

Why did the chicken cross the road? He grew tired of hearing the most over-used joke set up in recorded history.

His name is Frosted Mike, and he neither has nor does not have a penis.

Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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Whats the hardest part of the vegetable to eat? The wheelchair.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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