What did the Mexican shoe salesman say to the man? Excuse me, do you whih way to main street?

Why did the blonde arrest the man? Because he brutally murdered his wife and children.

How to smash an apple Iphone <<<<<< Use A Hammer >>>>>>> PS : if u want to break a hammer use an iphone

Yo momma's so old, she lives in a nursing home and is on various medications that she needs to take to stay in optimum health.

What do you call a deer with no eyes? No eye deer

yo mother is so fat, the recursive function computing her mass causes a stack overflow.

A black man walks into a store and buys a gun based upon the increasing crime rate in his area. He stops for lunch and heads home.

How do you make a kids parents mad? Fly an SR71-BLACKBIRD into him.

You can pick your nose and you can pick your friends but you can't wipe your friends on the couch.

A lil girl walks in to a bar........................ all a sudden a giant purple bunny jump up into her butt... now every time she poops its an easter egg hunt. LBall

Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

Why did the black man die? He was shot

Someone offers your friend one of two things he say's "choose witch one you want" your friends asks you and you say "if i were you, i'd be ugly"

A black guy , a white guy and a jew walk into a resturaunt They are offered the special.

What is the most dangerous place to be right now? Rodney Kings pool.

why can't you hear a pterodactyl go to the bathroom T H E R E ' R E A L L D E A D!!!

A man walks into a boar. The tusked beast accepts his apology.

whats worse than unloading a truck of dead babies with pitch forks? Finding one alive

Why didnt Steve Jobs make an iphone 5? He died

Why didn't Billy's parents get him any birthday presents? Billy was an accident.

Why black people are so good at football? Because they have white feet.

What's the best way to cross the road? Ideally with your feet and legs, consdiering as disabled people usually don't recommend their unfortunate state of affairs. However there are other alternatives which may or may not be better than common or garden walking, such as crane hire - crossing in a crane bucket in a safe spot; chauffer driven limos, which don't do the straight, direct route, generally; and being carried on a replica of Cleopatra's carry couch (but with modern suspension, unless you prefer the up and down motion)

A man walks into a bar and the bartender says "Sorry sir we're closed" So the man goes: "Oh, okay. I wasn't sure if you guys were open till' 10pm tonight" and the bartender goes "No, thats only on the weekends" The man thanks the bartender and proceeded to leave the bar. He now knows the arrive earlier the following day.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...