Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead! Why did the bird fall out of the tree? It was attatched to the monkey! Why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? .....................peer pressure

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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meatspin.fr

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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Roses are Red, Violets are Red, Everything is Red, Retinal Hemorrhage.

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Your mother is so dumb, that she had a very poor ACT composite score.

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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What's big fat and ugly? A monster

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Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

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What do you call a black man in the south? An example of diverse America

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A dyslexic man walks into a bra. He was at Victoria's Secret and he wasn't watching where he was going.

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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why did the boy fly away because his mum shot him out of a cannon

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2 drums and a cymbal fall off a cliff. Bu dum, cshhhh.

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What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

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What did the cat say to the dog before chasing each other You have a nice looking ass

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What is similar about Michael Jackson and Walmart? Nothing they have nothing to do with each other

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Hey babe, do you like going to sleep without shoes on? Because most people find it more comforting to remove footwear in order to rest and relax peacefully during bedtime.

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Is it colder on a farm than in the winter?

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what did the potato say to the apple nothing food can't talk

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When my parents said that they chucked a flipper baby into the Atlantic ocean I assumed a baby seal, I later found out that happened to my disabled brother.

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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Who's the best player in Madden 07 on the PS2? Michael Vick.

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What is lazy? My balls. All they do is hang.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops