Why did suzy get in the car? She wanted to go somewhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's worse than getting a paper cut? Getting shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree It was dead. Why did the second monkey fall out of the tree It was stapled to the first monkey Why did the third monkey fall out of the tree Peer pressure.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why was the blonde on the train tracks? Because she was tied up by a madman on crack.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

I saw a stray dog the other day So I petted it and got on my way.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Person 1: I need an adult.... Person 2: I am an adult. Person 1: I need another adult... Person 2: My friend's an adult too. Person 1: I need a third adult Person 2: GOD UR NEEDY!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q.What's green and smells like grass??? A. Grass

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What do you call a black guy flying a plane? A Pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's long, hard, and black, and goes into wet things? A submarine.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Knock knock, Who's there? Justin Bieber, LEAVE!

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why do black people like fried chicken?? Because it was fried

thumb_up thumb_down +8

whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a red corvette? i don't have a red corvette in my garage

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What would you do if your penis disintegrated? Never mate again.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Your momma's so fat: she now considers her body to be a metaphor for post-industrial excess.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who are we kidding, when have you ever seen a chicken crossing a road?

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the toilet paper roll down the hill? ... To get to the bottom.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

What is small, yellowy-white and emits a kind of cheesy smell? A lump of cheese

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the redneck leave his wife? To marry his daughter.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

WHAT DOES A NUMBER DO WHEN IT'S HORNE? MATHDERBATION

thumb_up thumb_down +8

rarw

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Q: what comes after 69? A: 70

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops