What's worse than having a gay friend? 9/11.

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Two gophers are in a tank One of them says how the heck do you drive this thing?

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What did the girl say to her ex? Fuck you.

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What did the doctor say to the other doctor? Hey bill

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Why couldn't Suzie put on her boots? Because she got her legs amputated.

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Why did Jimmy fall off of his bike? Well, he was always known for his lack of balance.

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Knock, Knock Who's there? Knock, Knock Knock, Knock who? Knock, Knock

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Asian: what time is it? other person: time for you to open your eyes.

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a priest, a rabbi, and a nun walk into a bar...and the bartender goes...what is this a joke? mr. healey

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knock knock whos there? steve oh hi steve please come in

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What is the connection between a blonde and a halogen headlamp? There is none, one is a female human being with blonde hair and the other is a headlamp with a halogen lightbulb.

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar Was it you? No

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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Sir, do you know what time it is? Yes, it is 5:15 PM

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How do you stop a black kid from jumping around in your bedroom? Chuck him out of the house.

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What do you get when you cross an owl and a bungee cord? My ass

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Q. Why is Obama stupid? A. That's an opinion, therefore i cannot answer that.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumpty had a great fall Humpty Dumpty is an egg so nobody cares

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How many apples does it take to keep the doctor away? 1 if you throw it hard enough! haha

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Why do fat people commit suicide

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Johnny: I saw you long time ago. You were quite the school clown back in the day. Boy I remember back when I was just a whipper snapper we used play around and goof around all day. Whatdya think? Richard: Shut up, motherfuckingbitch

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Teacher: What is 1+1? Student: 2 Teacher: Next time raise your hand before answering a question.

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A duck walked into a bar and said "ouch."

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flink geit, nei ikkke kneck bena hans jeh er på "forgiftnings avdelingen" third flor deen ask arund I mena i am the ønly guy in the world named Angelo Nero, so ull find me, srsly, got some ritalin on u? Do not respond, u know am not into drugz, but i waanna stay awak, get the detailz, remembeeer if you kicke his nuts, you get paid, if not go back. God jobb gutta, seriøst, kaffipiller ritalin, stimulanter? Not opiats, come with my phon so i can fuuk this netwerk,.. Ps: Okay break his leg, but ust one, hurry up remembr, cut his tungue (it grows bak jes) then tell dem you save him, you can be heroews, goat, tell fingern that when im bak, we are takin a trip on da limo, galz included becuz Mr.Black is the gentz. NO MOR REPLYES whre u? I want my phone not answrs her. Nero is a fucking demoppsn

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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