What did the cancer patient say before they died? I am in so much pain. I love you all

How did the three girls get free drinks? Two of them were attractive and out of obligation to "the game" the third girl was also purchased a beverage.

Q: Where is the One Piece? A: My girlfriend is wearing it.

A: Knock Knock B: 7

Why did the man not get home to his loving family? He blew up.

Knock knock Whos there Your Ma Your Ma who Your ma's in jail!!!

Why Are Parking Lines White? - So You Can See Them...

Q: What do you call a black person living in the United States? A: An African American.

How many feminists does it take to change a light bulb? That's not funny.

Fred: says hi Bob: says shut up why the hell do you have to be so rude!!! Fred:thankyou ob thats better

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? A bicycle.

What's the difference between a duck? One of its legs are both the same.

How did the black kid get in school? By taking the bus.

How does a penguin make pancakes out of skis? Purple because it's the best.

If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

What's the difference between a duck? They are mostly the same, only one leg is shorter.

How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

Roses are red Violets are blue And so avatars And so is blue paint

Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

Just so you are warned here folks, some of the jokes down here are really nasty, like you know... Antijokes... But luckily you got my family friendly stories about sex, incest, panties, grenades, dripping Meows, yeah... Regular family show stuff... IT HAPPENS TO US ALL! Right? Please tell me right? Riiight? Right? Yes? Phew, okay, for a moment I actually thought you where gonna tell me I was normal...

Excuse me, I have a shitload of stuff to do, so you are Eliza huh? I thought that was just one person conveying something to someone. Anyway, what is your name? My name is actually Nero, but you do not strike me as an Eliza, first name is more than enough. You know, if you dare, Ill be back shortly, I was gonna shower but then again, I haven't moved at all today, so yeah. Saved you? I have never saved anyone well, excuse me then, see you around, worry less about people bothering with us chatting, hell they might risk learning something (not a chance, people here are fucking jackasses, with one exception, and I do not mean me this time).

Q: What did the Rabbi say to the butcher? A: "Do you have the time?"

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

What are 3 skills black people have that they use for basketball? Great hand eye co-ordination, communication and encouragement.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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