Knock Knock? Why did you just say knock knock just ring the doorbell

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What is white, black and blue all over? A zebra that was assaulted by Chuck Norris.

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A dyslexic athiest..."'There is no Dog!"

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what did the boy say to the alien? ET i will protect you. The alien slaps him for being stupid

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why is ginger kid so sad? Because his all family was killed

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What do you call a black person who was in the U.S. army and survived WWII? A veteran, considering he fought a war and is still alive.

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What do you call a woman who is addicted to crack, has a light mustache and huge saggy tits, has had 4 kids with 4 different fathers and makes her living giving hand-jobs behind the bus station? Mom.

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If you are riding on a boat and all the wheels fall off, how many pancakes would it take to make a dog house? It does not matter because fish don't like tomatoes.

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Q: Do you know what you can make when you have enough cents? A: Dollars

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how do you make a blond girl cry? kill her family

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What should you never give to your friends as a wedding present? An old plastic bag full of rubbish.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic and so am I

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What happens when you walk around with a kick me sign on your back? you get punched in the face. How are you supposed to know it says kick, you cant see your own back.

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What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

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the mean terrorist said "i am going to kill your mother" that mother is now dead

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What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

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How do you kill a fat guy Keep giving him food he'll die eventually.

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What has a skinny head and specky? Josh Moran.

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Why does an ostrich have such a long neck? Because its head is so far from its body.

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A man walks into a bar. His family has died in a tragic accident and he is trying to drink down the pain.

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Why was it really gross when the blonde dove into the swimming pool? Because the swimming pool was full of phlegm!

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Roses are Red Violets are Blue Even though I can't tell Because I am color blind

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what's the difference between a dolphin and a ghost? dolphins aren't ghosts!!

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Q: whats red, spins, and screams? A: a baby in a blender

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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