How many feminists does it take to change a lightbulb? One, although depending on how high the light in question is and where it's located she may need someone to help hold a ladder for her, if it's particularly unsteady.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side. That's what she said

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Why was the boy holding his breath? A man was holding his head under water.

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A man walks into a bar. I don't remember the rest, but your mother's a whore.

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What did the cat say to the chicken? Meow

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Shakespeare walks into a bar, Having just seen someone that has been dead for over 400 years, the young man in the corner quits his drug addiction; it was clearly messing with his brain.

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A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

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Knock knock Who's there? Dave, I've got a fucking gun. Let me the fuck in.

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What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

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what do you get when you come across a old dog with herpes, a fat man with herpes and an apple? you get nothing but the satisfaction of seeing such a horrific sight

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Yes

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Horse walks into a bar. 'The barman says 'why the long face?' The horse says 'I've got cancer'.

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Just aids, and gonnoreah, and... Jk, I wont type it here, and I am not "suffering" from nothing, its a condition, it can be a struggle, and yeah it could turn fatal, on the bright side its not contagious (its genetics, flawed genetics) but on the bright side, so far chances are greater of me dying from a giant meteor falling on me as I sleep, than from this... Not disease, genetic flaw, take it from a guy that was born without toenails, has two eardrums and some weird tiny holes on his ears (I can send you a pic of those tiny weird holes, they are not weird, kinda cute I been told and can say so myself) so you calm yet?

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99 bottles of beer on the wall, 99 bottles of beer, take one down pass it around, 98 bottles of beer on the wall. 10 minutes into the song one man succumbs to alcohol poisoning.

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What do a software designer, a civil engineer, an airline pilot, and a long-distance swimmer's support team have in common? All of them use angles and trigonometric ratios to help solve problems.

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Roses are brown Violets are brown Someone keeps shitting in my garden

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Next season on teen moms, Justin Bieber tells her story.

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Q: What did jerry sandusky do with little boys alone? A: Teach them how to play football

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I ordered the "Anti-Joke" book Jk, waste of money

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If you listen to Justin Beiber all day long, what do you become? Very hungry and thirsty. And you need to go to the restroom.

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Q: What do you call a dog with no legs? A: It doesn't matter what you call him, he isn't going to come.

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What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

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What do you think when you see an asian woman behind the wheel of a car? She's very attractive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops