Why didnt the teenager have a smartphone? He didnt live close to a cell phone store

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How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

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why did the squirrel cross the road? -because it was stapled to the chicken.

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Knock knock Who's there? The bank. We've come to evict you from your house.

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knock knock who's there? to to who? to whom*

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Why did Quinn yell at his group project partner? Because he hated him.

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Know whats worse than a worm in your apple? Getting fridges thrown at you.

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What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

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Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

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Why did the man go to Lourdes Because he has lost all hope

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Why did Dan fall of his bicycle? Because somebody threw a refrigerator at him.

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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knock knock whos there? andy andy who? andy gold hi come in

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A man invites his Irish friend to his house. "Would you like something to drink?" the man asks. "Just kidding, we don't have any drinks." Later, they die of dehydration.

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Why did the chicken open door? It can't. Chickens don't have hands.

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How do you stop a blind kid from walking into oncoming traffic? .................to late!!!!!!!

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The Dark knight rises................. From the place he was before he rose.

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the WNBA.

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What did the Muslim receive for Christmas? Nothing. Muslims don't celebrate Christmas.

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Matt Gregory Harrington is a bender, pylon, hoser, duster tripod, and puck bunny!!!!

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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What did the man say when he put his penis in the blender? Arghhhhhhh!

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What did the bad boy get for Christmas? Incurable cancer.

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Three men are stranded, mid-ocean, in a small rowboat. They realize quickly that their imminent demise is slowly creeping into the forefront of their consciousnesses. Just as all hope seem to be lost, one man noticed an island covered in luscious foliage about five hundred yards away. A problem reared it's head as it became apparent that an unrelenting riptide was dragging the boat further and further from the shore and, in turn, salvation. It became further apparent that the men would have to abandon their rickety rowboat and swim the rest of the way. The first man bravely jumps into the vast uncertainty of the ocean and attempts to swim to shore. He is met by a large shark that promptly severs his arm from his body. A bloody mess, he manages to touch down on the sandy beach. The second man, more reluctantly, also jumps in. He balanced his chances: "100% death in the boat vs. uncertainty in the ocean." Like the first man, the second man meets the shark's vicious bite. His leg is severed and he too drags himself, bloody, to the warm embrace of sand and freedom. The third man, sure that he would be bitten also, jumps into the ocean and swims to shore. Alas! The third man arrived on the island unscathed and completely fine. Perplexed, the first two men asked the third why the shark did not attack him. The third man simply smiled and replied..."what do you expect me for, a typewriter?"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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