What is "race car" spelled backwards? rac ecar.

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Want to hear an anti joke? Me too thats why Im on this site.

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Why did Johnny fall off of the swing? The swing was defective. Knock, knock. Who's there? Johnny's lawyer.

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Why did the little boy fall off his bike? His mother threw a washing machine at him.

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If 2 trains are going 60 mph, their going in opposite directions towards each other, they are slowing down 1 mile per hour per 10 miles and they are 100 miles away, would you rather have Coke or Pepsi?

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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Easy, you get a phone with a recorder that rather than playing a "please leave a message after the tone", plays the same tune as if the phone was still not picked up. Now tell me here and now, because I wont waste more time on you, what part did you play in this? Jenny Chatterton? Another one of your pseudonyms? What the fuck did you think would happen? You live in the Uk, london, so, tell me everything, or I will share every single detail here.

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There was a little boy (Jewish edition) Saten: Look father, my silk vestments make me look so much more fabulous than you! Gad: Oh! Hawt sweetie! But not as pretty as my dress... Err I mean "silks"... Anyway you are no longer my son! Which means we can do you know what ;) Saten: Hmpf! I am feel disappoint in of your dress! Gad: ITS SILKS! just *basically* a dress... Oh my gawd! You refuse to give it to your "daddy" ;) You are losar ant not gonna get to hang around this club anymore! Saten: OMFG you are so enrage! You are liek not classy or flamboyant at all anymore, sorry pimp "daddy" :/ Imma leavin! And btw Adam my secret lover has such a bigger wienersnitzel anyways, and he is totally eating my fruits if you know what I mean ;) Gad: Oh me so jelez I am completelay going to panish him! I am throwing him out of Paradise and he will only be abley to get children with women now, lulz I am liek so evel. Saten: OMG WEMEN! UR LIEK ZO EVEL! What u goin to do next huh? Forbid Sodomy? Omg tat would be so mean :(... Moral: "NEVER WEAR A FINER SILKS THAN GAD!"...Well, it starts with two flamboyant faggots fighting over who has the "prettiest silk vestments" (basically dresses)... The rest kinda kinda figures.

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Why'd the monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was dead. Why'd the other monkey fall out of the tree? Cus he was stapled to the dead monkey!

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What did the mute man say to the president? Nothing, he is mute

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Random link time! http://www.booksie.com/thrillers/novel/declan_mckimm/pure-evil

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Man :A homo-sexual panda walks into a gay bar. Homo-sexual Panda : Wait...wait I'm gonna stop you right there. I will not take part in this odd joke, so just ummmmmm ya. And another thing, my species is extremely offended by your inferior remarks. Why can't homosexual panda just have piece?

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what did the child say to his mother? daddy raped me!

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Why did the koala fall out of the tree? Because he was dead.

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What's the difference between a gluten free cereal and a regular cereal? One has gluten, and one has no gluten.

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Once upon a time, a duck named Jim went to work, he went up to the steps to his new job and and he was paid all day to sit in a hot tub. Little did he know it was a boiling pot and he was served at Christmas dinner

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Knock Knock. Please stop peddling your religion on my doorstep. .

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Doctor, Doctor I think your gay. thats because i am

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Two hippos are in a lake with water up to their eyes. One of them then says, "i keep thinking it's tueday"

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How do you scare a blonde? Paint yourself yellow and call yourself big bird.

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"Knock knock?" "Who's there?" "Two dead kittens."

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A black man has a job.

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roses are red, violets are blue, if you want to success, stop being a mess..

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What did the schoolgirl say to some of the people of Anti-Joke.com? You're sick. Stop talking about the Holocaust.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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